Periodically my gf comes out with the most hurtful stuff without

How many red flags will you ignore before you finally take action?

>>18668189
What? This doesn't sound bad at all. What are you talking about?

How is that hurtful...?

Regardless of your ages or how long you have been together, it doesn't seem like you two are compatible for the long term.

>>18668189
How is that hurtful
What are you upset about
Why would you be angry at her for discussing things like that
If you're incompatible because of goals and lifestyle then that's one thing, that's not anyone's fault
It's not her job to conform to everything YOU want, she is her own person.

>>18668194
>>18668195
>>18668197
>>18668202
all of this
>>18668192
youre on drugs

>>18668197

Listen to this anon, OP.

The biggest thing here is the fact she didn't want children, while you do. That is a monolithic difference in futures and something that usually doesn't pan too well.

>>18668195
It's not hurtful in itself. It's just the way she says this stuff. E.g she's like 'oh yeah I want to spend all my money in a few years going round the world or whatever' - where does that leave us?what about my priorities? I'm starting out in my career at the mo so travelling isn't really my main thing.

>>18668211
Hurtful's not the word to describe it then. She's just talking about her plans for the future.

>>18668197
I dunno I don't think we are incompatible. Apparently her family were the same & her parents married with the same difference of opinion re the kids. I.e her mom didn't want them initially and her dad did.

Also we are quite young in the great scheme of things so I'm not about to drop her because she wants to go travelling a bit or isn't sure about these things.

I just want her to communicate in a way that is less abrasive/ thoughtless is all. How can I broach this with her.

>>18668223
I guess so.. maybe it's just 'shocking' rather than hurtful.

>>18668226
it sounds like that's just a personality trait and you either have to adapt to her way of speaking and KNOW that she doesn't mean it in a thoughtless way, that she loves you and it just popped into her head and she always blurts things out, or acknowledge you can't deal with it so you should leave.

Unless of course she legitimately doesn't care about you or if you're around after she thinks about it a bit deeper. It sounds like it's just a quick thought she blurts out before thinking about it any deeper. I wouldn't worry about it, but you should be honest with yourself and realize that it's just the way she is. getting people to change is almost impossible, especially over something so small.

>>18668235
Thanks. This is sort of what I thought. I guess I can't expect her to change her character. But hopefully she does really care and will think a bit deeper in future before acting upon these spur of the moment comments.

look OP,

We don't know you two very well, so nobody in here can tell you that "you two don't belong together" with above 50% accuracy, but based on what you have said it seems like that.

Her behavior is a red flag, although it usually takes more than one to cause a break up.

>>18668254
Put it this way. I love her so much I would probably wait for her up to .. say a year.. if she went travelling. I could easily handle her heading off for a few months without a doubt.