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All I ever wanted was a girl that I could love and be proud of, and start a family with.
I started wanting this when I was like.. 11. Essentially, every move in life I've ever made was to this end. School, job, how hard I try in regard to everything... nearly every endeavor was to be as best a "catch" as I could be and prepare for this future family.
I have concluded this is not in the cards for me. There is something critically wrong with me... women I am interested in (smart, attractive) are just not buying what I'm selling. They just want none of it. Maybe its my looks, maybe my personality, I dont know and its really beside the point.
I should mention that I know I could just hook me a fatty and be done with it, but I dont want to look at one and I dont agree with that lifestyle or level of laziness and... its broader than just a shallowness, I just wont be able to stop wishing I had something better. I'm very fit, I'm not lazy and I feel like I have enough self value to warrant a quality partner.
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What do I do? What does a guy who has been working towards a singular goal nearly his entire life do when he finally has to accept this goal is unattainable?
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Is there a drug I can get hooked on that would block me wanting this? Would lobbing off my balls be worth the trouble? I think about this 24/7/365 for fucking years, decades even. I can't stand to be worried about this anymore, I want to be freed from this obsession.
I feel like its as deeply-ingrained a human trait as there ever was, but still there are guys out there that just never think about women (or at least, not being with one longterm) so I have some hope that maybe I can find that mental space.
I'm so drained from worrying about this and I cant stand to get rejected by another girl that seemingly should be a good match. I cant fuckin do this anymore, I'm dying.
>tl;dr How do I enter a mental state of not wanting or wasting energy concerning myself with a partner/wife/gf whatever?
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How old are you OP?
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>>18667623
32 now.
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>>18667574
>>18667658
Kind of feel you though I'm a decade younger, I came to believe that the only solution would be to chemicaly castrate yourself, just getting rid of that instinct, haven't come to it yet cause I still hope... yeah...
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>>18667698
See, you've got time to improve yourself.
Back then I was full tilt ahead, i'm gonna have a cool job and be fit and all this, ill get to just pick who I want.
But no, no thats not how it works.
I think I'm kind of a rare case though, I think generally if you strive hard to be a good catch you'll hook a good one too. and at 22 your looks (if you have any) havent peaked yet so you can still attract good ones. if you are fugly like some of us in this thread then i dunno what to tell you. give up, nothing matters. fuck this gay earth, everything is horrible.
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I think is an fixed expectation, just try to live your life man, and then you will find it.
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>>18667574
Hey OP, I'm 34 and also want to start a family with a great woman. No success here either, but learning to meditate has helped me be more calm and accepting of my present situation.
Not saying it'll remove your desire or make you into a robot, but it's given me some peace.
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Get on tinder and have lots of hookups.
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how short are you?
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>>18667574
I've always wanted the same thing, I'm a girl tho. I got tired of waiting and settled for a guy who I really love but he's not a hard worker like me and it's really hard to except that. Especially now that we have kids and it affects them too. Don't be to overly picky but don't settle either, you have to be able to except your partner for who they are. Just know your not going to change them
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