im a lazy irresponsible loser. how do i turn my life around and

find something that you want to accomplish and work towards accomplishing it.

then do that again about ten thousand times

You won't. You don't change unless you decide to. Chances are you'll stay the same until you're forced to change, then you'll bend or break

Very generic and common advice compilation: do it one step at a time with regularity, do not be too harsh on yourself, if you're past your 30s do not aim for the top, you can still find happiness with a modest income, do things that cannot be undone to force a little responsibility at a time upon yourself.

Slightly less common tip: give yourself a deadline for some serious improvement, like 1 or 2 years from the moment you've taken your first step (2 weeks without breaking your sleep cycle or consistent workout for example) ; consider drastic measures afterwards if you don't make it, like drugs to increase productivity and concentration, with carefulness and previous research ofc.