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This doesn't deserve its own thread, but there isn't a catch-all thread for things that don't deserve its own thread.
The feeling of depression is starting to feel overwhelming. My chest hurts, I feel like I'm not getting enough oxygen when I breathe in. It feels like the light inside is fading. I really, really want to kill myself. It feels like no amount of talking about "permanent solutions to temporary problems" or my family is going to talk me down off the ledge this time.
They always say you should call a hotline or check yourself into the hospital, and I thought about doing so, but wouldn't doing either of those things mean you don't actually intend to do anything? If you're calling the prevention hotline, that means you want them to prevent you from harming yourself, which means you probably weren't going to harm yourself. So that must mean that if I'm thinking up the phone, then there's inherently no reason to.
I started dry heaving midway through typing, and now my clavicles hurt. I feel like I'm suffocating or drowning. This feeling is oppressive.
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The purpose of talking to someone else with depression in mind is to get some outside perspective on it. Getting a second perspective on your misery, lack of ambition, or other self doubt can help you come to understand your thoughts in another way, which can open new pathways in your own behavior.
What responses did you expect to see, when starting this thread?
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>>18658941
So you want to want to no kill yourself? It is up to you to find meaning in your life. We aren't born with a purpose, we make one for ourselves.
I think this is the problem with young people in our culture. People have been taught for decades that if they whine hard enough somebody will fix it for them. What happens when everybody is whining? You are indolant in your personal progress, that is the problem. Nobody is coming to save you because you are fully capable of saving yourself. Volunteer for a cause you believe in (animal shelter, soup kitchen, etc.). Strength comes from within, not without, and you have plenty.
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