>43 years old >Married highschool sweetheart >Had a

maybe you didnt have time/willpower to mourn your wife since you had a teenage daughter to raise

do you have friends? ones that dont require you to put up a fake smile everytime you see them

do you have any hobbies as banal this sounds, you need something new that doesnt remind you of your wife if this feeling doesnt go away in reasonable time

maybe a new work and new place, id imagine that house is not exactly the best place to be in where you were with your wife

>cheer up

round two, grandkids

also, lots of guys at my office, re-marry filipino gals 10+ years younger

>>18627573
>ones that dont require you to put up a fake smile everytime you see them
Not really. Our daughter is the only person I don't have to put a fake smile on for.

>do you have any hobbies as banal this sounds, you need something new that doesnt remind you of your wife if this feeling doesnt go away in reasonable time
No. I've started playing video games again, which I haven't done since before our daughter was born but I don't think that counts.

>>18627579
I don't think she's planning on having kids for a while and to be honest I'd rather have no strings attached sex with a mildly attractive prostitute than an Asian girlfriend/wife.

>>18627597
if you just want a sloot then hit on dumb whores or single mothers, plenty of golddiggers to hop on that creditcard

>>18627597
>I don't think she's planning on having kids for a while and to be honest I'd rather have no strings attached sex with a mildly attractive prostitute than an Asian girlfriend

Yeah nah dont introduce this into your life you're quite correct.

What you need to do is take the time to Learn to be alone.
It's incredibly hard and you'll never fill that hole in your life. What you need to do is learn to live with the hole and focus on sharing yourself especially the good parts of yourself with people worthy of you.
If you don't overcome this it will continue to eat you over time and you'll be an emotional burden instead of a positive force for those around you.

And you're right about the travel.

I'd recommend you take up some solitary pursuits, music, or writing. Something creative that will lead you new places even if all be it kicking and screaming. You strike me as a decent, balanced and sensitive person and it's a shame to see that all going to waste

Shit OP i would say spend time with ur daughter but if she could care less (with all she respect that's shitty of her) then take up some hobbies. I know it sounds cliche but at least for me hanging with ppl doing things ienjoyed made shit a lot less lonley. That all I've got good luck

>>18627619
You misunderstand. She comes over most weekends and spends time with me and I love her because of that because I don't have anyone else. But I just have a nagging suspicion that she would rather spend her weekends doing her own thing with her friends instead of hanging out with her depressed dad. She's moved out and is completely independent of me right now, but I'm not independent of her. If that makes sense.

>>18627630
Oh got it... hmm maybe look to date younger women. If u want a relationship as for patching up loneliness just try new stuff

>>18627530
Find a person to do things with, who preferable would give a fuck about your mental state after getting to know you.

Otherwise, try doing something like making something new, could be a game, could be a computer or some other contraption.

Even playing games with ppl around your age and talking through some voice app should be fun. It isn't hard to find ppl to play with.

>>18627530
I hope you manage to feel better soon, OP

Find something new that just consumes you and also has a social element. I'm an older anon myself and took up rollerskating/blading at my local rink this year having never skated in my life and I am having an absolute blast. It's thrilling on its own, great exercise to help stave off depression and stay fit, it's extremely social and I've met plenty of people at the rink (lots of girls!), there's fun music, and a vibrant atmosphere. It's cheap to go and if you like to tinker or customize stuff in your hobbies the sky's the limit with skate gear. You can custom build skates and there's a huge spectrum of different types of wheels, plates, boots, stops, cushions etc etc. It's great fun, and very uplifting.

>>18627530
You're compounding three separate depressions.

There is nothing wrong with continuing to grieve for your wife. And there is nothing wrong with feeling the "empty nest" syndrome and the "I'm not primarily a father any more so who am I?" crisis.

They are all normal and common responses to painful and emotionally confusing situations, so don't add to them by beating yourself up over them.

In a way, the third might be the key to it all. A big chapter in your life - being Daddy - isn't actually over, of course, but its nature has changed. What lies before you is "Who do you want to be now?" and the answer might not lie primarily in dating. What couldn't you do while you were being Daddy that you now have the opportunity to do? Advance your career? Change careers? Go back to school? Work on that invention you thought of a long time ago? Read? Write? make music/art?

Get involved in something - anything - new and you'll regain your zest for life.

(And much respect for being Daddy so well)

>>18627530
>Dublin and got all the way to London
Brother that ain't traveling but a weekend trip

Anyway, you are an empty nester now since your daughter moved out. When you wife died you still had support and raise your kid. Forget the dating scene and start looking for some hobby or study. Make a list of 10 things and start. If you tire of one move to the next and then make a list of 10 more and do the same. Somewhere on that list will be something you really like but don't know it yet and connected to that you will come across women interested in something similar. No need for the dating scene because you are out there increasing the likelihood of a chance encounter.

>>18627597
>Not really. Our daughter is the only person I don't have to put a fake smile on for.
A social circle will help you greatly. It offers great support and good company.
Also, try to pick some hobbies. But not anything just for the sake of it, try to rediscover yourself, what are/were you interested in?
You can stay idle at home, it is unhealthy. Maybe consider moving to a new place, more suitable for you? Is a big house in the suburbs suitable for your needs?
Maybe this will help: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Art_of_Loving

You have to find new meaning in your life. It's hard and there will always be a void, but you have to adapt to survive.

>>18627769
>rother that ain't traveling but a weekend trip
I know. I had intended to spend 4 months travelling but quickly found out that it's not very fun doing it on your own without someone to share the experience with.
I might try that list thing though.