hey guys need some advice been dating this girl for a few months

>>18614430

you are normal, she is a narcissist. dont' know what to tell you. feels like you are a short term thing for her.

>>18614434
you sound confident in your answer... sorta makes me worry a bit aye. can you explain a bit more please man?

>>18614430
She's damaged goods. Sounds mean but a normal girl doesn't act like that. Don't fall for that retarded "If you were confident and trusted me...." meme. You are acting rationally and if it was me I would have realized she was nothing more than a slam piece.

I completely agree with >>18614434
Also when she says her body doesn't belong with you she is right but a relationship is about keeping both sides happy. If you became grossly overweight although it isn't her body she would not be wrong to tell you to lose weight. That's what a relationship is, an exchange.

>>18614436

im old, i've seen this before. does she have a little girl voice?

another question: where is her dad?

im guessing he's not around or left at an early age. if im wrong its not as bad as it could be.

>>18614440
ok I see.. fuck man. really wished it was just all in my head and she's alright but now im a bit scared hearing about her being a narcissist. any signs I should keep an eye out for?

>>18614444
you hit the nail on the head dude. she hasn't had her dad around since a very young age and she has a very school girlish sort of a voice, higher pitched and quite stern. tends to hoard conversations with large groups of people around and talks about herself or tries real hard to be a part of it. are they red flags?

>>18614447
Watch out for ways she may try to manipulate your valid concerns into insecurities (as she has already displayed)
>You going half naked to these marches were anyone can see your tits makes me feel uncomfortable
"Don't you trust me? Are you not confident?"
>Having you take naked pictures also makes me uncomfortable. I'm not sure I would like my girlfriend to behave like this
"It's not YOUR body. Why are you being so insecure about it and possessive?"

She feels validated when she views the photos because she has objectified herself in her mind. Whether that be due to the past molestation is irrelevant in this case, you won't fix her. She doesn't go to these stupid movements to "take back her body" she does it to feel the validation of men drooling over her and giving her what she wants. I mean honestly, think about the where this leads. The same arguments she is using now she can use to validate why she should become a stripper or do a porn.

Be grateful you found out what type of person she is so you can brace yourself. Every time I've been burned in the past is because I didn't know what type of girl I was dealing with but now you do. Props on bagging a crazy hot girl, enjoy her while you can but be willing to walk away. It will save you a lot of heartache and pain.

>>18614453

yes, they are. sorry buddy. so, you can walk now or decide to enjoy the ride, but just know that you will never fix her. do not try. start being centered on yourself, not getting caught up in her stuff, and mentally preparing /distancing yourself for upcoming drama or a betrayal. Do not ignore any uncomfortable gut feelings - they are there for a reason.

good luck

-old dude

>>18614464
the examples you have provided.. whilst are true she sugar coats it, they aren't so blunt. you bring up a good point about her wanting dudes to drool over her at these movements, but then her response to that is "they can drool all they want but they wont get to touch me, you are the one who does" and then.. I see past it all and agree. am I being manipulated by someone who is actually cold hearted deep down? I have no idea. but I know these feelings im having aren't over nothing, im feeling them because of something which brought me here the only people I can ask for advice.. heh. it really hurts now dude, I have some strong feelings for her and she says she does too.

>>18614477
I got to get to sleep so this will be my last response.

I know they probably aren't as blunt but even if she does sugarcoat it that is the pith of what she is saying. Good, she acknowledges and admits what she is doing. It isn't so much that the guys "can't touch" (yet) it is that she is actively seeking these responses from other men. This is one step away from her flirting with other guys (even if they "don't touch") and two steps away from the part where touching gets involved. Yes you are being manipulated and she seems to be doing a pretty good job thus far.

Do I think she is some ice cold bitch who has planned all of this? No. However, she is manipulating you and you are falling for the frames she is setting for you. I don't doubt she cares about you. Damaged people can be genuine about their emotions but it doesn't mean she won't fuck you over. It honestly seems like you're having a hard time coming to terms with it. You can either take the good advice here and learn from the mistakes I and others have made, follow all of this advice >>18614476 and start the healing process now. Or you can get fucked over and spend a few weeks in emotional torture wondering how you let this woman ruin you to the extent she did. One of those two will happen, wish you the best.

>>18614430
>im not some maniac taking control of his girlfriend im just not use to the idea of tons of people seeing her in revealing photos

OP she is not your gf but a girl you have been dating for a few months. You're like the guy that dates a stripper and mad she shows her tits and genitals though you met at the titty bar.

Well you better get used to it. You see really sweet beautiful wifey material that is all yours and possessive of everything about her and she wants to share herself with everyone. She has no boundaries and you have unreal expectations. You are being very insecure and it will become worse and she will respond by more displays of her body.

>>18614499
but we are in a relationship though? I don't see how im being insecure about it nor even unreasonable? im not trying to be possessive of her and what she wants to do, I want her to be happy. I even said that she can go do her modelling thing if it makes her happy, just no nude shit as im not comfortable with that idea yet

>>18614515
Two months OP is not a relationship and you knew what you signed up for when you went out the first time.

Now if you came to me and said she dresses provocatively and as she flaunted her body it was intended to be sexually suggestive I could see a problem but again you knew this before you signed up. You've become sexually possessive of her, normal of most men, but your sexual possessiveness gives you no standing in determining what she feels comfortable in exposing. You live with it or you don't.

>>18614529
ok I see your point but according to her if she wanted to go into public with me wearing something skimpy, then I should be ok with it? because to her at the end of the day its not them touching her, its me. but like.. it just feels she has no self respect to how much she is just throwing out there for all to see. I guess it just makes me uncomfortable knowing she wants other dudes to drool over her, like im not enough or something. lol fuck that does sound insecure

>>18614547
No dude you're totally right, she isn't doing anything wrong it's all you being irrational. Have fun being in a relationship with a girl like his. I'm sure she can't possibly hurt you in the future with the way things are going.

btw: I also like going on advice boards and shaking off the advice others give

>>18614560
no im definitely taking the advice given to me, im just sitting here paranoid now though and not really sure what to do dude sorry. I don't have anyone else to ask

>>18614568
You do what other anons told you to do. Create distance and wait for impact.

>>18614571
how would you do that exactly? you sound like a man of experience

>>18614574
Start taking breaks in between your interactions with her. I mean, if you're hanging out with her 5 times a week cut it down to 3 then start dwindling it down from there. Start building up your life outside of her. Make new friends or start hanging out more with your old ones. Get into new hobbies or start immersing yourself more in the ones you have. This is all done with the intention so that when she does leave your life it isn't some catastrophic event. By then you will have already built a healthy and sustainable life that does not revolve around her. It will help with the healing process and if you begin getting into the right mindset now it could help mitigate the shit you will deal with when it all ends.

>>18614580
ok thanks for the advice, I will take it. I don't know what other replies you have given but how are you so confident that she will fuck me over though? have you experienced something similar to what I have explained?

>>18614588
I know because a girl who has similar traits to the one you're describing fucked me over and left me a mess for a few months. She loved male attention at parties and would pursue it. I let her get close when she started telling me about her mother's death and really felt like I had something genuine with her. To date one of the happiest moments in my life was waking up in the earliest hours of the morning and feeling her head on my chest as she breathed gently. The serenity I felt at that moment is something I've been chasing with other girls but still haven't found. She later send me a picture of her sleeping with another guy.

>>18614602
im so sorry dude. thank you for your wisdom you might have saved a bro from heartache

>>18614547
I don't think so far she is doing this to be sexually suggestive but it is intended to get attention and make people uncomfortable including you. She may get to a place she realizes people are aware there is some naked girl in their face but they don't really give a fuck because they are living their own lives and she says fuck it whats the use. That day is a long way off however and as long as she has you feeding the discomfort there is no incentive to stop.

Anyway you chose the wrong girl OP and I'm perplexed how the two of you got together in the first place. I know you think you are in a relationship but does she?

>>18614633
yea I hear you. its what gets to me the most is that my approval or something of her being attractive or sexy isn't enough, and she needs more of it from other people by doing the shit she is doing. so I don't know how im going to tell her that but I don't think ill be able to handle that. I think she knows we are a relationship, she says she loves me... she addresses me as her partner afterall

>>18614654
>she needs more of it
Op listen to the wise anons that's a red flag. Everything you need to do about this relationship has been said in this thread but for your sake i'll reiterate.
Just enjoy the ride and start making a backup life that doesnt include her in it. Brace for Impact

>>18614654
Here's what I told a gf that had stopped stripping when we got serious but started again and admitted to me it wasn't for the money but the attention but she loved me, wanted to marry me and have a family and would never cheat.

I was tired of arguing how silly I thought it was she had to have attention that badly when she really couldn't put a finger on why she needed it. I told her it is her life and she should live it however and with whomever she chooses but so should I and I choose not to live mine with someone that takes off her clothes and dances suggestively for men she doesn't know. Not saying it is right or wrong but for me personally it won't work and I'm out. She cried and begged but in the end she was unwilling to stop so she never saw me again.

>>18614681
Moral of the story
Men should have principles and it should be on the highest order higher than religion and even family.

>>18614699
Exactly, you must have the courage to walk away when a personal boundary is crossed.

>>18614681
yea that's fair enough I would have done the same except my girlfriend isn't a stripper... but I guess she might as well be? I don't know.. she was molested and this is her way of feeling sexy so I don't really know how to handle that without looking like a controlling cunt. im trying to steer clear from being seen as that sort of partner.

>>18614588
not the other anons, but think about it like this. she's empowered by putting herself out there to be objectified by men. she knows exactly what's going through people's heads when they see her walking around topless or posting up nudes. she enjoys the rush. maybe she won't cheat on you, but it doesn't seem worth it to put all your faith in someone like that. it's only a matter of time before it all comes off the rails.

-different old dude

>>18614731
okay.. I see. I gotta question myself whether its worth it or not.. I just hate walking away from shit not knowing what could have been sort of thing. it's not like this relationship isn't serious either, she talks about kids and marriage.. and seeing that sort of thing with me. a bit quick I reckon to say it but at least I know what she wants. I guess im just gonna have to keep an eye out for more red flags and if there is one that just pulsates a big no, then ill have that talk to her

>>18614746
do you want the mother of your kids walking around the city topless or putting nudes out there?

>>18614746
Seems like you already have a firm grasp of what you want OP. GoodLuck

>>18614444

Nice quints

>>18614430
Red flags anon. Gut feeling telling you shit aint right and you are wise to ask to confirm your suspicons. Dont get feelings for her and whateer you dont marry her or get her preggy. Your life will go down the toilet.

I can see her getting gangbanged and her excuse will be that it helps her with the pain of past trauma, which may be true but whatever she is still mentally loopy.

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>>18614762

Poor guy, I would give him rope to hang himself with but it seems like someone already has that covered.

My /adv/ ? There are plenty of women out there. Like... A lot more than you can count kiddo. What could have been? It could have been great, but say it does work out decent and you guys start a nice family. Won't you think what could have been if you were single? You could have been that guy fucking topless bitches at parades that are easy game due to their psychological state jus sayin boi

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>>18614805

>>18614798
>>18614799
true.. thanks for the advice dude

>>18614816

Anon I wish I knew you in real life so I could take you out for a beer at a strip club and then take you home to suck your dick

>>18614832
thx dude ive never had my dick sucked

>>18614718
Yeah but my ex was always modestly dressed when in public, never told anyone she stripped but in the club she took on a totally different persona. It made her very successful compared to the other girls hustle. You're girl wants the world to see. At least my mother and father never saw her naked or knew what she did.

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>>18614833

Yeah but you got dubs bby