I have depressing thoughts all the god damned day. I've had helicopter parents that have seemed to see me as a means of taking control of something and lessening their own existential dread, but I've never been able to have my own experiences without going behind their backs. What's worse is that when I tell people (even those I know) about my depressing thoughts, I can expect them to not respond or to even start avoiding me for a while. I'm fucking stuck beside myself, and if I don't become self-sufficient within the next year, I don't see how I'll make it. I'm 22M and about to graduate college with 3.8 BA in Business.