What's wrong with my girlfriend? She hates cuddling, hugs,

>>18593746
Possibilities:
1. In her relationships with close loved ones (parents, siblings, peers), there wasn't a lot of love, and she often felt neglected and began to withdraw her emotions and deny her need for emotional connection to protect herself from future pain
2. Her relationships (parents, past relationships, current relationship) have been more directly harmful, hurting her or scaring her into believing emotionally close relationships are dangerous.
3. Options I'm not currently thinking of.

When we're children, we rely on our parent. We depend on them for comfort, bonding, security. Babies that have been neglected will choose a squishy blanket over food, even if they're really hungry. This dependence on others carries over into adulthood, and as we get older we have the potential for more relationships--for better and for worse. Someone with an emotionally healthy childhood can be ruined by a traumatic event where their friends ridiculed them and they learned to shut themselves off and not let people get too close. Other people learn that as soon as they're old enough to have thoughts.

Good thing is that you can retrain your brain and open yourself up to being more emotionally expressive. It's hard work, though. It's scary as fuck letting people in.

Tell her how you feel and ask her.

>>18593760
>>18593746

Option 4. She just doesn't express love in those ways. People have different ways they express affection. My ex usually wasn't that much of a kisser, but over time got used to it because this
is how I expressed it. But it took a few months. Tell her that her behaviour makes you feel rejected and ask her why she does not like this. Be supportive and curious instead of accusing and demanding. After all you're learning more about your love to help your relationship grow further. Make sure she knows that. She should feel more comfortable. Maybe she'll "let you in", maybe you'll find another way of showing love that you both really like. Talk. A lot. It really helps in relationships.

All forms of expressing love can be broken down into five basic categories
- Physical Touch
- Acts of Service
- Quality Time
- Words of Affirmation
- Giving Gifts

Everyone's got their primary way of showing love--it's like their native tongue. Unfortunately, two people rarely share the same love language. As a result, when we try to express our love for each other, it can feel like one of us is speaking Greek and the other is speaking Russian. It's important to learn your partner's love language, both so that you can learn to show love for her in a way she'll understand, and to notice when she's trying to express her love for you in her primary language, even if you may not understand it as well as your own.

>>18594010
>>18593983
>>18593760

The answers are largely in abuse desu.
Every single person who has problems with physical affection has had a troubled experience with people in the past.

My best friend can't stand hugs, cuddles or anything. She can't stand a guy even getting slightly attached to her, if he wants to hang out outside of sex she cuts and runs. She straight up just left because a guy tried to spoon after sex.
She's also had an abusive father and her first boyfriend turned out to be a possessive stalker.

The honest answer is she likely has feelings for you but struggles to deal with her own issues.
My friend finds it really difficult to show basic affection to even friends but I notice the little things she does that reminds me she does give a shit about her friends.