My partner is extremely selfish. He asked for a break and I have

>>18589449

Just tell him this
>I'm tired of trying and being upset over him and hoping things will get better.
Dump him and move on. Focus on yourself until you're better and then look for someone better suited than him. Simple as that.

>>18589449
Why did he ask for a break?

Also, I feel like you've been denying your needs in order to avoid pushing him away. We all rely on our partner for comfort and security, and when it feels like they don't or can't provide that, we either get really upset and angry, or we withdraw and pretend we don't care or don't have any needs at all. But they're there. We all long for touch, affection, closeness, and when we don't get it we feel abandoned, isolated, invisible, starving for emotional connection

>>18589477
First he claimed depression, then he pulled all these excuses out of his ass and blamed me for stupid arguments even though he was equally at fault.

I want to work on things and even though I didn't want it, I thought a break would help so I agreed to it but I'm slowly realizing he's just not making any effort at all while I'm here trying to improve myself by getting help, staying sober, working out, etc. I do have a tendency to put others needs before mine but the abandonment issues are slowly arising.

>>18589498
Just tell him your feelings. Steer clear of blaming him, try not to get angry at him. Just focus on telling him how you felt when such and such happened.

Like you can tell him that you want to get closer to him and connect with him, but you feel like he's so distant. It hurts you when it feels like you can't reach him, because he's important to you and you want to be able to turn to him for comfort. When he doesn't give you the supportive response you're looking for, you feel invisible or like you don't matter at all to him, and that scares you and makes you feel like you have to go through all of your own issues alone. Focus on sad and scared, not angry

>>18589498
What were the excuses he pulled? Also, can you think of some of the arguments he blamed you for?

>>18589449
>ghost
Nope be a goddamned adult

>Is he a bad person for not helping me with my mental struggle?
That really depends how you look at it. I would just do what you need to do in life and *stop moralizing.*

That being said, I understand how you feel. Maybe you'd be better off with someone who reacts to things a little differently. There is a reason you're taking a break. Maybe you just need to stabilize before getting *seriously attached to someone who is liable to just dump you.*

>>18589510
Our arguments were literally about political issues. It's not even serious.

At this point you're in a one sided relationship and you can do better. Dump him and find someone who won't ignore you when you need them to be there for you.

>>18589504
I told him yesterday that I know he needs his space right now but if it was okay with him maybe we could catch up after my appointment happens in a week to see how we are both doing and he didn't even give me a response to that.

I'm not angry, I'm just hurt and disappointed. I don't feel like I'm asking for too much out of him at all.

>>18589511
>>18589557

>>18589449
You deserve better.

I pull similar shit with my girlfriend.

It's because I'm a sad, selfish piece of shit.

Move on.

>>18589603
Why be in a relationship in the first place if you act the same way with your girlfriend?

>>18589608
I love her. And I owe her so much happiness.

I'm taking steps to better myself, and I dream of the day when I can repay her for everything she's done for me.

>>18589608
Not that anon but thats a dumb question mane

>>18589623
I'm the anon he asked the question to.

I dont think it's dumb at all.

>>18589603
Another anon here who did that too, but only because I wanted to try getting other girls.

>>18589630
We've been together 5 years. Since we were 16.

Other girls definitely go through my head.

I'm in the same boat but I'm done trying. If she wants me in her life she can pursue me but I'm done putting in effort and not having it reciprocated. I suggest you do the same. Tell him to fuck off.