How do I get over my misogyny? I've been treated badly by

>>18577266
Our brain is great at protecting us. Millions of years of evolution developed a brain that can expertly avoid pain and danger. One of the ways it does that is by making a note of times when you were hurt or perceived you were in danger, and it tries to avoid those situations in the future. It's great at doing this because it makes assumptions and generalizations. When we were out in the wild, risking life and death every day, this was a fantastic way of keeping us safe. Better to be safe and live another day than risk losing everything.

We no longer live in a world where our survival and physical safety is constantly threatened. Unfortunately, we've still got a brain geared towards that. We still have assumptions, prejudices, generalizations. They help keep us safe, but more often than not, these days they also keep us from connecting.

It's good to recognize that your current interactions with women are tainted by your past. Awareness is great! Awareness is the first step of stopping your thought process and giving you the ability to rise above your amygdala and use other parts of your brain to open yourself up to connecting with other people

>>18577266

>How do I get over my misogyny? I've been treated badly by women since childhood so I tend to treat them horribly by default.

Get some therapy. The fact that you know your behavior is illogical is the first step to fixing it. Work towards addressing your dysfunctional thought patterns and changing them, not validating them through confirmation bias.

>>18577266

Go to therapy. Work through your issues.

On the short term, just stop yourself when you realize what you are doing. No need to apologize or try to fix things up. As long as you stop when you see you are being unfair, you are on the right track.

>>18577282
Also, I'm not sure if this will help you, because you and I are completely different people and just because I feel one way doesn't mean you will, or should in any way. But maybe it will help you to hear what I've experienced.

My father was an angry, scary man. He would curse, yell, break things, and once he even picked my mother up by her throat and threw her into a dresser. He also enjoyed telling my older sister and I that we were hot, from the start of puberty until he died in a fiery motorcycle accident. My male cousin tried to get a video of me naked, and it took him jerking off under a cover next to me before I realized just how many times he had jerked off while my two sisters and I were in the same room. I was friends with a boy who had no friends, only to find out he'd been spreading rumors that he'd fucked me using a balloon as a condom. I dated a man who guilted me about my fears of pregnancy until I agreed to anal, only to have him try and shove his penis inside me without any prep work or lube. When he did happen to ask how I was feeling, I responded the same way: it hurt, and I didn't want to keep going. He said to just give it more time, until he got frustrated that he couldn't fit all the way and gave up. I immediately went to the bathroom and discovered I was bleeding. I was with another man who knew I wasn't okay with having sex, but then he tried to slip his penis inside me only when he thought I'd fallen asleep. I conveniently squirmed, just as I had when my father had groped my crotch, only I had to keep doing it until he fell asleep. I didn't trust that he'd fallen asleep, so I didn't sleep that night.

Do I hate men? Absolutely not. Those men are not all men. To take my past experiences and apply them to all men would be doing all of the decent men out there a huge disservice, including the man I've been in a loving, supportive, healing relationship with for over 6 years now.

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Literally nothing wrong with it as long as you're good looking.