A friend is trying to groom me into a dysfunctional relationship

do you care for her or do you just see her as a way to keep yourself afloat?

do you think you would be able to help each other in the long term, or just stave off the inevitable?

>>18572614
I'd want her to thrive and be happy but I've known her for ten years and I know she is not going to, even without my involvement.

We are both miserable people but then again her dad is a cunt (he's my car man and odds are if I wasn't a friend of his daughters I'd want nothing to do with him) while mine was a harmless sperg save for the clinically depressed self-destructive bullshit, the dynamic she is used to is worse than what I've grown up with.

To be honest it sounds like you both have to work on yourselves before getting into a serious relationship, where your problems are just compounded. If anything, you could use the potential for a healthy relationship with this girl as motivation for improving yourself to the point where the relationship would work.

>>18572638
I was considering the latter possibility. I've been in and out with shrinks since I was 14 (I actually sought help for the depression) and I've found them completely useless.

She only got help this year, and I really don't believe she's ever going to actually confront and deal with her traumas.

Sounds like it could be a positive relationship (even if you keep it to friendship) if you talk about your issues with each other in an open and honest way.

If you want to fuck her, fuck her.

>>18572647
Then my advice is not to get into the relationship. I've been improving myself so I can get into one as well, and the loneliness has really given me the motivation I need to get better. I've seen so many relationships with underdeveloped people fall apart because they think a relationship will solve all their problems, it doesn't. It's even worse when they have kids before the relationship falls apart.

>>18572683
I have no sexual desires, which has been one of my worries. There's a chance she might not be content with a sexless marriage.

>>18572687
Unfortunately loneliness only guides me to alcohol.

I know relationships aren't a magic cure, I've seen it so many times and I've had it happen to me.

But then again she'll just sit there being sad anyway while I'm drinking myself into an early grave.

>>18572700
I can't begin to understand alcoholism, but I've gone from being a whiskey lover to totally sober. I made fitness my hobby so had less and less time for drinking, and less incentive to consume the empty calories. All I can suggest is to find as many new things to obsess over that you have little to no time to drink until you no longer even want to. Hopefully those obsessions will be productive, making you a more attractive person to date.

>>18572725
Sweetheart, I'm from Eastern Europe. I know it's not an excuse but fatalism, alcoholism and clinical depression are in my blood.

Alcohol makes me happy. It is the only thing that makes me happy. Drunk, I am warm and content and safe and happy. While sober, I only want death.

I daydream about finding out I have some mortal illness because the thought of only having two years to live instead of 40 or 60 would be such a relief.

>>18572592
There is an organization called Adult Children Of Alcoholics that can help you and her recognize the traps she's falling into