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Sup /adv/. Excuse the long post but maybe you're willing to help me here.
There's this dude I met about a year ago at class. I've been always the more introverted type but he seemed to be receptive enough. Personality wise he was a troubled individual, a bit perfectionist and more vocal than the rest, perhaps because he was also older and more experienced than pretty much the rest of the class (however he was more quick to jump to the wrong conclusions than anyone else as well). We built a fairly strong friendship for a while, including his family. His step daughter was a little bit awkward but for a while we also established a friendship.
Most of the time I tried to help him out, knowing of some of his personal issues. At first he pointed out my flaws quite frequently, one of which was me being more agreeable than I should, and he was quite right about it. Problem is eventually I would see myself as not really changing that but adapting that to him as well.
Things halfway through got a bit more fucked though. His daughter went back to her old "crazy" ways, with her stealing, lying and punching her way through anything she wanted. This brought him and the people around her down, as well as me because I had a different image from her. Everytime after that, every little improvement she would show to people was a façade, and she would keep deceiving the day after, doing this for months. So basically, one of his big problems for a good while is effectively her attitude. But also shrinks. And his wife. And his other family members. And his multiple jobs. And a plethora of shit.
Eventually, as I tried my best to put my time away just to help him, he got more demanding and I was seeing a pattern. Not everything that he complained so much about had the same level of importance. Little things would get him tense and angry at everybody, and I was a target for his anger half of the time.
(cont.)
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A few solutions were presented, like kicking his step daughter out of the house (she's 23), divorce because the wife was enabling her and they were always fighting... but none were exactly "easy" so he would just pop more pills and go on. I treated all of this as part of my own problem as well, maybe because I wasn't doing everything right, but I was also getting tired of him and his family. Many times we would fight over little things.
So, at some point he got really angry at a teacher for one of the final exams, almost got physical, granted this teacher didn't do his job as well as he should but it was rather clear that my friend was in the wrong and he was looking for a way to ease his pain. I helped him out of the situation and he was quite successful in comparison with the rest of the people in class, he got pretty much what he wanted, it was rather exhausting to have to be there for him at every single point but I felt that it was probably for the best.
So the aftermath is, the last time we met he was in a pretty decent state and all, we discussed some things, nothing unusual. I considered taking a "vacation" from him, but not in a literal sense, as I would hang out with him if he asked. The thing is, I haven't heard of him in a good while. Last thing I read from him was a message telling the class group that he got a new job and wouldn't see them again, but he told me absolutely fuck all about it. In a whole month I haven't really heard anything from him, but considering all the trouble I went through to make his life just a little bit easier, I'm thinking of just letting the whole thing go completely instead of contacting him.
tl;dr had a decent friendship that got quite rough for enough time to perhaps break it, helped this person out through hard times but now there's no contact for no reason whatsoever, should I just get away from it or put myself in contact with this guy again?
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I'd say if he values your friendship as he should, he'll come back and things will be peachy. Dude sounds caught up in his own business, which often comes off as selfish but its human. Take care of yourself.
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>>18558883
Thanks, I guess time will tell.
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