Not exactly an advice thread, but I believe that this could potentially

>>18546030
I dislike being my goofy self around others, so I try to be "normal"/invisible.
I think I'm afraid of what people would think of me for behaving like myself as opposed to what I think they think I should behave as. I'm dreadfully afraid of social rejections, because they would validate my belief that people inherently dislike me.

>>18546068
Do you have a problem with acting normal?

>>18546074
I probably do. My idea of normal is to avoid eye contact and keep to myself so as to not bother anyone, and to speak only when spoken to so I don't seem stupid or unstable. Though deep down I would love to just have a conversation with a stranger. Admittingly I don't have strong social connections with people, and I think this affects my ability to be normal.