So my gf of 6 months told be today that she identifies as "queer"

I'll stay with her for awhile because the sex is good, we get along, and I genuinely do like having her in my life. We've talked about this kind of stuff, and I've delicately dissented from some of her SJW views, but if it's clear after maybe a year that she's still not maturing and instead continues to play along with SJW identity masturbating, feeling like some kind of minority even though she's a white woman, then I will have to move on.

Does this seem justified? We're fine in all other respects. I'm just thinking ahead to what my eventual relationship goals are and thinking to myself that I don't want to marry a woman who'll bring these immature ideas into my household and fuck my children up.

There is literally like 1 million something+ women who are better looking, with better personalities, just waiting for a man.

This is a non-issue. Just leave her.

>>18541404
Frankly anon, to me it seems like you're making a mountain of a molehill. Is this really such an issue? If she's in a committed relationship with you what does it matter if she finds girls and guys hot? It sounds to me like you've given this anti sjw stuff more importance than it deserves, as maybe she's given the queer stuff more than it deserves.

File: IMG_3100.jpg (42KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 600x600px

>>18541404

Lol. Not marriage material. For me if im dating a chick its because they are possible marriage material until proven one way or the other. If theyre not, then they are just a fuck buddy until somethijg better comes along.

Definitely stick together if you enjoy banging her. But yeah, start looking for your exit. And make sure you dont knock her up or you will be so totally fecking fecked you will end up looking like pic related

>>18541411
I think his issue is that she's becoming a living meme and he doesn't want her pushing her pseudo "hey look how cool and special snowflake I am" views on their future kids.

Tumblr has done a lot of damage to women.I met a girl once that legitamtely thought she was a wolf trapped in a persons body. She was normal but then got weird roughly at the same time Tumblr started picking up and of course the animal kin shit began.

Have fun with her now OP but you know full well it will be a marriage of horror if you stay.

>>18541404
If you already know she won't be your life partner I wouldn't waste any more time. Way too much potential for unnecessary drama. I get the steady pussy angle but her declaration is actually a warning of what's coming. Detach and replace.

>>18541424
>I met a girl once that legitamtely thought she was a wolf trapped in a persons body.
That's called otherkin, aka furrier than thou, it's a subset of the furry community and is far older than Tumblr.

>>18541411
I didn't really give it any thought at all at first. I thought just what I said: She was sexually repressed and experimented during her senior year in high school. I didn't care that maybe she could find some girls attractive since she was with me, the same way she'll find other guys attractive and I find other girls attractive, but we're still in a relationship and don't cheat. It's the fact that she can't put it behind her, and instead college fucked her up even worse and made it a part of her permanent identity.

So instead of thinking it's something she did, but being mature enough to say that we're in a heterosexual relationship now, she's only been with guys since, and for all intents and purposes she's a straight person who experimented with a friend back in high school; she defines herself by it. She brings it up all the time, and has been doing so more and more often.

And as I said, I really want her to just move past it and not let it define her entire life and identity. I want her to be mature, but she's not. She loves being able to call herself "queer" and "LGBTQ" and be in a community of those people, even though she's only ever dated men, other than that one friend in high school.

One day, high school is going to have been a long time ago (it already is somewhat), and if she's still using that to define her identity, I think that shows immaturity. And on top of that, I wouldn't want that mentality and the normalization of same-sex attraction and gender-fluid/gender-queer ideology in my future household.

>>18541403
How old is she?

If she's young (college-aged or younger) then you really are making a mountain out of a molehill. She probably is bisexual, it's not that uncommon, and plenty of bi girls go through phases like this. She'll probably grow out of it.

People here flip their shit (I don't love the phrase "sperg out" but that's really what it is) at any hint of identity politics, and I agree that a lot of it is pretty eyeroll-inducing, but it's really not that big a fucking deal.

>>18541435
She wasn't aware of its existence until she started using Tumblr though. While some people no doubt are like that, many people are just influenced and start to believe it just because they want to be special.

>>18541440

Its a pretty big deal when you are dating with the intention of possibly marrying the person, having children, and spending the rest of your life with them like OP is.

Yeah, if its just casual dating, it really isnt the end of the world. But it sounds like OP is looking for marriage material, and is curious if other people think this is a dealbreaker. It is. Marriage is serious fucking business, its not something where you settle with someone who has glaring flaws in their personality and temperment.

Again, if you wanna have fun OP, then roll with it. But if you are scouting for marriage prospects, this is not the one - keep looking.

>>18541405
I'd like to, but though most of the other women I've dated haven't been bisexual, they've all largely been indoctrinated into the same weird ideology and found some way to be able to feel oppressed and identify as some kind of deviant.

University was just not a good place to find women. Where could I find normal women? I'm not asking that they have any particular political views. I don't care her views on the safety net or healthcare or abortion or national security are. I just want a 100% heterosexual girl who thinks men are men, and women are women, and who thinks the two have a relationship and eventually settling down to have a family, to raise those kids with good values like respect, reason, honesty, and integrity, send them to good schools, and watch them grow into fulfilled, responsible adults. I'm a law student with pretty good future prospects who's literally just looking for a normal wife to share my life with. But that's getting much harder in today's fucked up world.

>>18541420
>>18541424
>>18541425
Yeah. I know deep down that you guys are right. I know it's not gonna last. Hell, I've even told her brother that, and he was surprisingly cool with it (because he's not a fan of her weird ideology and lifestyle either). I'm just the type of guy who's always in a relationship because I don't like being alone, and haven't found someone else yet.

>>18541440
She's 23, just graduated. I'm 25, going to law school.

>>18541437
>She brings it up all the time, and has been doing so more and more often
So, the fire alarm goes off and you don't leave the building?

>>18541437
Hold on, what's wrong with same sex attraction?

>>18541459
>the type of guy who's always in a relationship because I don't like being alone, and haven't found someone else yet.
I know that feel dude. Think about it this way, you don't quit a job before you've found a new job do you? I apply it to dating. I guess it makes us assholes but nobody wants to be left with jackshit at the end.

>>18541455
Why would you want to get married, as a man what possible benefit does that afford you?

>>18541455
>>18541468
I agree. She's not marriage material. She's deeply flawed and immature and wouldn't make a good mother. I've tried to give her a chance to mature, but she doesn't want to because society and her friends now give her more validation for being immature than expecting her to grow up and become a normal, functional member of society.

I'm just considering keeping her for another year (my last year of law school), and then starting an even more serious search for a wife once I'm settled with a job. But as I said above, I'm not sure where to look for normal women nowadays, since extremism and niche internet ideas seem to have fucked so many up.

>>18541470
I don't believe thats OP's problem but he wants a heterosexual woman to settle down and have children and his gf is headed in a different direction. If OP doesn't break up she ultimately will and likely having the same relationship doubts about being with a man.

>>18541437
Considering that she's finished college and is still using a one time experimentation in highschool to define her as part of the LGBT community, the maturity ship will never arrive at port.

Have you ever been around when she waves it around? Maybe just somehow worm in to people she knows that she did experimenting once (which I think you said was just some kissing?) and let them know that she's only ever dated guys ever since. The LGBT community also really hates bi people and considers them fakers, so a fake bi person will piss them off even more. Trust me.

>>18541473

Taxes?

Everything is basically muh feels but yeah you wouldnt accept that answer so have something concrete.

>>18541475
I personally wouldn't drag this out another year. In fact she may be the one that splits from you first. Anyway, when I left law school and went to work there was pussy everywhere. You'll be able to find a like minded woman easily. I found mine in her own boutique while buying a gift for my mother.

Probably fine as long as she doesn't go further down the slippery slope.

If you look at online dating there are probably more girls listed as bisexual than straight, but do you actually think they would consider an exclusive relationship with another woman? Bring a woman to meet their parents? Most likely means they just like looking at beautiful women like everyone else on the planet.

>>18541455
>glaring flaws
Oh, please. I've known plenty of girls - dated some of them - who went through periods where they acted just like OP's girlfriend. Most of them grew out of it, and today spend their days doing things like not browsing Tumblr and not attending lectures with titles like "Smashing Heteronormativity in Gaming Culture."

Now, I'm not saying that they ALL grew out of it - a couple didn't, and turned into fairly unpleasant people. OP no doubt has a better sense of whether his girlfriend will turn out that way than I do. I'm not telling him not to break up with her, that's up to him. But it does no good to listen to the 4chan echo chamber on this, because to most of the people on here, "SJWs" are just about the most offensive things on the planet, and it's inconceivable to them that many people flirt with identity politics as a passing phase and then grow out of it.

>>18541470
I don't care what people do in their personal lives. And if my own kids turned out to be gay, I'd still love them and want them to be happy. But it's about creating an environment where I can pass on my values. I don't want to normalize it or make my kids think it's normal or empowering or cool. I wouldn't want my wife saying it's fine that my son wears a dress, or letting my kids decide they're non-conforming at an age where they're too young because of what mom says. I've read about and actually seen in my life too many examples of young, trendy millennials making their kids a conduit for their ideology instead of trying to do what's best for them. I want to raise my kids so that they know what men and women are, biologically, so that they view heterosexuality as the norm, that they value real relationships and not promiscuity. Because I want them to have healthy and fulfilling relationships and lives. If they turn out to be gay, then they're gay. But I don't want to encourage deviant behavior from a young age, because that has an effect on children, and I've seen it. I know young women at law school who are bright and intelligent, but their mothers where avant-garde New York bohemians who experimented, let their kids know, and told them it was fine, and so many of them now have issues with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and other interpersonal issues. I don't want that because I'm an empathetic person who wants whats best for my kids.

>>18541471
I agree. That's why I'm with her for now. As I said, probably until I finish this last year of law school.

>>18541473
To have a family with that I'll invest my resources in, so I can watch people I've created growing up. I'll love them, and hopefully they'll return that love. And I'll grow old knowing that I helped make a small difference in the only way people really can: by being good to the people around them. And I'll hopefully have a loving family around me when I die.

>>18541521
>I'll grow old knowing that I helped make a small difference in the only way people really can: by being good to the people around them.
You're really not helping your case by staying with a girl for a whole fucking year when you've already decided you're incompatible and have no future together. You think she'd want to be with you if she knew you had that shit rattling around in your head?

She may have picked up some misguided ideas but to hear you tell it she still treats you pretty well and you know, motherfucker, you KNOW perfectly well it's not right to waste her time. A whole year of her life.

>>18541479
>>18541492
>>18541493
The problem is that she's not surrounded by otherwise normal girls and just sampling something trendy. I've noticed that she has less and less straight girl friends, and more and more she's been hanging out with butch lesbians, gay men, and "non-binary" people, who look like girls with mustaches.

That's become her community. So it's hard for her to change or grow out of it, because she's surrounded by it all the time and probably feels compelled to keep up her "queer" identity to continue to fit in with her "LGBTQ" friend group.

She'd need a clean break from those people, and maybe then she'd be able to start integrating back into normalcy. But she's actually been going more in the direction of only being around "queer" people. It's become her life.

>>18541488
Could you talk about how you're relationship with your current girl from the boutique started? Because if I'm honest, I think college fucked me up a little too, and made me dependent on the loose college atmosphere for finding women. How did your truly adult, post-education relationship start and develop?

>>18541535
Point taken. I guess a less sugar-coated way of putting it is that I want to produce well-bred, successful, good-valued, and well-adjusted young people. My grandparents were poor and rural, my parents are lower middle class, I'm on track to be at least middle and maybe upper middle class because my parents sacrificed and I got a prep school education, a top college education, and now law school. I want to do the same for my kids, so that maybe one day they'll be better off and more successful than me. Maybe I'm just a sucker for the old-school American dream, but that's the life I want to live.

>She's let the corrupting parts of the internet define herself

I bet you wrote all that without feeling even a twinge of irony

>>18541561
Why should I? Yeah, I come to 4chan and browse and laugh and sometimes post, but I haven't let it turn me into a woman-hating, anti-semitic, racist extremist. I'm pretty moderate in my politics. If I have some traditional views, it's because I grew up going to upper-middle to upper class private schools, and they instilled traditional values in me. Not because my parents were rich. They weren't. I got financial aid, and my parents sacrificed a lot (no vacations, few luxuries, no cable growing up, old cars) to pay the rest. Because they wanted me to be exposed to good values and good people.

>>18541541
Well in that case it will probably only get worse.

>>18541579
Alright, fair enough. I took a shot in the dark and missed.

>>18541591
No harm done, man.

>>18541403

>mission failed, we'll get em next time.

>>18541691
I'm not sure what you mean by this.

>>18541541
Well you probably wont change her mind regarding the while lgbt community. If that's where she likes to be that's where she'll stay.

If that's a complete no go for you then you should probably just end it sooner rather than later. But please make sure to think it through first, you were already imagining yourself having kids with her so it sounds like it's pretty serious. She is not necessarily going to "ruin" your kids just because her friends are homosexuals.

>>18541712
It is serious. I love her and want to spend the rest of my life with her. I'm so attracted to who she is, not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually too. If it could just be us on a desert island somewhere, I'd be happy. That's why I'm so conflicted about this. I have my values, but I also have emotions. And the war between them is tearing me apart.

>>18541541
>How did your truly adult, post-education relationship start and develop?
It was normal and easy. Not easy in that we hooked up then tried to get to know each other but easy as in no drama, no lingering ex's and she already knew who she was and we had reasonable boundaries neither one got close to crossing. We just exchanged pleasantries at first and she had really nice things so shopped there frequently. Asked her to lunch one day, went well, then asked for dinner, then she asked me to a concert, and then she cooked me dinner. Now this wasn't rapid fire but over 4 months we got to know each other. If I said I would do something or be somewhere or if she said the same you could take it to the bank. Normal, decent, respectful human interaction. It wasn't boring because she was smart, funny and well traveled and any crazy she was already over it and learned from it. Just don't be in a rush and if you need pussy just hook up with the easy girls because partner material is worth doing your homework and an investment of time.

>>18541729
Sorry to follow up, but again I'm used to college girls who fuck either on the first date or before the first date or who only fuck. When and how did you start introducing intimacy and sex into your developing relationship?

>>18541718
I think you should stay with her fammelam. You don't have to engage yourself fully with her queer friends if it's not for you.

Also if it comes to it and you have kids with her just make sure nothing is forced upon them. You can show them the traditional life since they will grow up in a regular family with a mommy and a daddy. You can easily teach kids that there are other sexualities out there that they need to understand and respect without forcing them into making up their own unique snowflake words to describe themselves. Just ask her to be moderate about these stuff and I think everything will be alright. It really sounds like you love her my man.

>>18541521
>I know young women at law school who are bright and intelligent, but their mothers where avant-garde New York bohemians who experimented, let their kids know, and told them it was fine, and so many of them now have issues with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and other interpersonal issues.
I'm not entirely sure that you can make such a neat line of causality there. I was raised in a loving and stable family, and I still developed major depression when I went away to college. I was able to beat it because my family forced me to get treatment which they refused to allow me to give up on when it got hard. I'm quite thankful for that, though I certainly wasn't at the time. These things just happen, I think what's really important is being committed to doing the best for your kids.

That's another blind spot I think you might have. I was thinking about how you said some people want to use their kids as a badge of their progressive nature, while you want what's best for them. I think what you might see as the former they would see as the latter. For instance you say you'd be ok with having a gay kid, but is it really healthy to raise them in an environment where you teach same sex attraction is wrong? Teaching them that they are wrong.

Just a thought anyway, I don't ever intend on having kids myself.

Okay. This is going to sound weird, but hear me out. Keep the relationship until November 2020. If Trump wins re-election, then there really is a longterm reaction in this country against SJWism. Move on and find a normal, traditional girl like you want and have the family you're looking for. If Trump loses and was only a last gasp of reaction from a dying old America, which might very well be true, then stay with her, embrace the degeneracy and the change, get a tattoo, and join her and her friends because that's the future. Your kids will be queer and genderfluid and polyamorous because sex, gender, heteronormativity, and the nuclear family will all be things of the past. Sad, but better to go with change than go against it and suffer.

>>18541732
Like I said this was not rapid fire date and date and date and make a move but talk, have lunch, talk, meet for coffee, dinner, some work related function and took her, etc so when we kissed it was natural because we knew each other and liked each other and turned on by each other. She invited me for dinner she cooked, we had an after dinner relaxing drink and led to sex. But again we knew each other and there were no hidden agendas.

>>18541748
Oh brother

>>18541745
I wouldn't say that I'd teach them same-sex attraction is wrong. I'm trying to articulate the middle ground I believe. It's just that I'd want to bring them up in an environment where it's assumed that boys like girls, girls like boys, they form couples, and eventually get married and have kids. Obviously that's not true. Even straight people don't have kids, don't get married, get divorced, etc. But I want them to have that foundation of normalcy in their childhood. But again, if when my child were a teenager, he or she came out to me, I'd accept that and want to make sure they could still find a happy fulfilling life. And I'd still tell them all the same things about safe sex and healthy relationships. I just want my kids to grow up with a foundation of what normal is, some structure to understand the world before they have to face its complexity. I wouldn't want my wife to tell them about gender identity or sexual orientation or transgender people or anything like that before their older and more certain of who they are. I think telling kids about that stuff when they're took young can convince them that they maybe are like that before they even fully understand what sex or sexuality is. Do you see where I'm coming from?

>>18541403
sounds like she has joined a cult. Most of this LGBTQ propaganda is just a religion in its infancy.

>>18541403
three way m8.
only way to win

>>18541403
A third of women now identify as bisexual. It's normal. Relax.

>>18541959
Not true. Just looked it up. 17% of women have reported sexual relations with another woman. Only 5.5% actually identify as bisexual.

>>18541762
Be aware that any third grader can tell you what gay means.

>>18542022
I didn't know what homosexuality was until middle school because I had good, wholesome parents and went to private school. Before then, gay was just a synonym for stupid.

>>18541424
Tumblr hasn't done shit to women. There were plenty of bat shit insane women before, there will be after tumblr has disappeared from existence.

>>18542036
I had wholesome parents, still found out about it at the school yard. Maybe you were just a bit slow.

>>18541437
You're thinking quite wise anon, don't accept anything less than you want for your children to experience; she could be a 10/10 in every way except the one and if that is the straw needed to break the camel's back, then you gotta stick by it. Either she changes or you leave