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Daily existential dread help? I'm 19 and I've been

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Daily existential dread help? I'm 19 and I've been out of education for a while now because I realized what I wanted to do (film) only after all the admission deadlines had passed last year. So now I'm going to start an 8 month program in January and hopefully apply and get into a 2/4 year one for the coming September.

Been trying to set myself to a schedule of watching films/reading ect but I constantly end up relapsing. I feel like I'm in a very timeless state of my life right now, and it's driving me insane. I feel like I go through depressive episodes daily. I'm more lonely than I'd like to admit.

I have a job where I work 4 days a week but it's just to keep me busy. I don't like it much, but whatever I can deal with it. But other than that my only contact is with my parents and my best friend whom I hang out with a lot. I have another good friend who I play games with semi-often.

I know I have it better than some, but I'm finding myself really unhappy sometimes. Like at least 3x a week, and it makes it so difficult for me to accomplish things. I don't know what to do, or what this post even is. I just want to do more before January, but I feel suffocated. I've barely tasted adulthood and I can't seem to cope with it :(. Any words of advice? Or anything?
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>>18533403

if you are so lazy that you can't even 'watch movies' as part of your work load than you are in for a world of struggle.
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>>18533403
o ultimately we cannot really tell you how to be motivated. its not a multi step process. even if it was, if you arent motivated to just work out, how would you find the motivation to do something to get you motivated to work out? its a flawed concept.

the best thing you can do is create some small goals and try to meet them, and build up to bigger goals. the high gets bigger with every accomplishment.

you can also try other systems that don't rely on SELF discipline. Slave system (like when you were younger, you did what you had to do in order to avoid punishment). Reward system, you give your self candy or ice cream or your favorite video game at the end of the day only when you accomplished your goals. Buddy system, where someone who also wants to do this or something else works with you and you work with him on each of your goals (this ones a bit flawed as you might just end up bringing the worst out of each other). then there's mentor system which is where you have someone who DOES run the marathon force you to get up every morning and run with him until you get there.

none of these require self discipline, there is motivation but it comes from external forces, and while it can help get you to the finish line and learn your real potential you will likely just fall back into your normal routine once that system is no longer in place.

the fun thing about self discipline is that everyone CAN have it, and its pretty literally just a choice. you can choose to do something. just because you CHOSE not to do it doesn't mean you can't do it. you literally can. but most people can't wrap their minds around the concept. they've convinced themselves they 'can't. simply because they 'won't'.
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>>18533421

heres the thing though: you don't need to WANT to do something in order to do it. even if you hate doing it, you can just do it anyway.

thats how you find out who you really are.metimes you meet people who say they want to be a writer. then five years later they still say they want to be a writer. and in that time they will have written nothing but maybe a chapter of a book, and some fanfiction.

anytime you ask them how writing is going they will say 'oh i got writers block'. despite never even having a basic writing break through, they will claim writers block. despite them not knowing how to write, never actually writing anything, and hating it when they do write, they will insist that they are a writer.

you are the less obsessed version of that. You see something that LOOKS interesting, then you try it, and it isn't something you enjoy, so you leave. the writers i mentioned earlier are like you but they are obsessed with the idea because of the lifestyle it brings to their imagination. its almost like saying you are a youtuber. you just want to be looked up to for no real reason.
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>>18533422

so you are at least one step ahead of the vapid people. and there isnt actually anything wrong with you per se, maybe something small, but ultimately if you don't enjoy something, and its not going to bring you something you really want, why do it? its okay to give up on things and just move from one thing to the next, cuz you're not 'giving up'. giving up implies some sort of commitment. imagine if any time you broke up with a girl that you didn't like you said you 'gave up'.

the only REAL issue here is that you might be giving up on things you WILL like or WILL give you something you want/need simply because you are used to instant gratification. working out isn't fun, no one really enjoys it per se, but people stick with it because of the results they get. even though running a marathon sounds stupid to me, to actually just set a goal and see it through can be beneficial in and of its self, and when someone like you is directionless, something as generic as a marathon might be what you need to realize your potential.
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>>18533418

Wow, thank you. That cleared up some stuff for me. Sometimes I can barely sort out the thoughts in my head; I really appreciate it.

I'll try not to fall in love with just the fantasy of things. It's something I've been aware of, yet I still do it. I definitely have some unrealistic expectations of the world(and maybe myself). <---Or do I? I shoildnt be so hasty to shut myself down

You're definitely getting at something in regards to giving up. I actually realize it's something that I convince myself of far too often, and I take commitment a little more seriously than I should in some cases. Thanks again man.
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