Has porn ever destroyed a relationship? I feel like my husbands

Porn is just pictures and video, a fantasy it's not real. It's a tool to aid in sexual gratification, it can't take the place of actual intimacy.

So what has you so concerned?

That's the problem.
There is NO INTIMACY anymore. Porn has taken over his life. I have no sexual gratification, no closeness, no intimacy.

He just wants to jerk off and has closed himself off to me. I guess watching me give birth to his 2 kids sealed the deal

And he isn't even watching porn to jerk off anymore. He watches it like to just sit there and "unwind" -- he doesn't want to have sex with me he wants to sit in his car and watch some random women and not even beat his meat. Just watch them and enjoy them. That's way more intimate than he's ever been with me.

>>18507639
Perhaps talking about it?

That or seek counseling?
Sometimes men do the things they do because they are stressed from something, and do not wish to stress out others, or feel any less of a man for talking about what is making them closed off. Something is causing it, and the porn is an outlet. We all have outlets for something when we are stressed, or feeling down, its natural. Finding what makes us stressed and alleviating helps us to be less dependent on our outlets.

Maybe you're ugly and fat as shit sweetie
If he doesn't want to fuck you, you're clearly doing something wrong, no clue why you'd blame your husband for your own shortcomings LMAO

Did this guy really put two babies in you and then basically abandon you? It sounds like he can't deal with the reality of sexuality, and people's bodies, and has retreated to the idealized world of pornography to cope. I'm so sorry he did this to you. Men are garbage. You should leave his ass.

>>18507695
Im not
Why would you marry someone you think is ugly and fat as shit in the first place? That doesn't even make sense

>>18507706
He looks at all sorts of weird porn is fetish is "hairy grandma"
I don't even understand

>>18507712
These is either advanced bait or advanced porn addiction.

He needs your help.

>>18507708
It's called taking what you can get
If he's not wanting to fuck you, you're doing something wrong. Maybe a little introspection is due

>>18507712
My dad does this, but my mom only has sex for procreation so I understand. Though it's really scary to see that your dads internet history of granny porn

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>>18507695
>>18507706
Shut it. This woman is looking for reason, not the extremes.

She has two kids. It's more complex than leaving over pornography, which is a shitty excuse just to end a marriage.

People react differently over time due to changes in environment. We adapt to cope, sometimes in good ways and sometimes in bad. Stress from a job, or homelife, or changes in our own hormones from age do that to us. Go back and look at when this situation all started. What were the factors that lead to this outcome? What was different? What changed?

>>18507733
Her vagina more than likely looks like a rotting corpse. Would you want to stick your dick in that?

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>>18507735
>12 year old detected

Jesus, why is everyone such an asshole in this thread?

Yes, porn addiction can absolutely fuck up a relationship. You should seek out more specialized groups on reddit and stuff for advice. Or better yet, a marriage counselor.

>>18507739
Who are you quoting? Lurk more you are terrible at this

>>18507639
yes. porn can separate you from spending time. there was a movie about this, forgot what it was called. beyond that porn can lower your sex drive and cause your mental and sexual health to degrade

>>18507712
Well then, stop shaving, dye your hair grey, gain 30 pounds, and start wearing frumpy oversized clothing.

It's the only way to save your marriage.

>>18507657
>watching me give birth
Lol, dont tell me you actually forced him to vitness birt?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2225936/A-husband-confesses-Seeing-wife-birth-sex-YEAR.html

Mariagge counseling or psycholog.

You need to make him talk to you. Invade his personal space and hug him and tell him you wont let go until he admits what is wrong.

>>18507639
Yes.

Sexual gratification (sex, masturbation, porn etc) is supposed to be a limited sensation in a normal person's life. The more exposure a person has, the more varied those types of gratification need to be before fulfilling that urge. This is why people who regularly fap to porn graduate to stranger shit over long periods of time. This is how sexual degenerates are created.

Porn addiction can subsequently destroy any chance of having a meaningful relationship, because not only does it distort your standards of physical beauty, but it also fucks with your expectations of a real romantic relationship. Very few people are 10/10's wrapped in turtle shell bondage ready to fuck random UPS drivers.

>>18507639
He's given up. Some how and without more info I can't be more specific but some how you need to help him self motivate. To wake up and seize life again. Porn is just an escape from whatever is holding him down mentally. You two are a team but half of the team has his his dick in the dirt. Some guys respond to a swift kick in the ass while others need to be coaxed out of their funk.

Be the coach - you know your husband figure out how to wake him up then just go for it. Once you get him awake then you can figure out how to sexual stimulate each other again.

>>18508023
No he wanted to be there

>>18509812
Well, he failed out of an important certification program that would have helped him get a promotion. I make more money than him now, and it will be a few extra years until he can earn the promotion.

The porn issue started a few months after that. Before then he occasionally looked at porn, but only when we were apart. Since his porn object is old hairy women it didn't bother me (he def has mommy issues). Now, he literally will sit in his car watching porn or he will lock himself in the bathroom when he comes home and jerk off to porn. It isn't JUST granny porn, but mostly it is. He was also watching some twerk videos on YouTube which kind of hurt me because I have a very toned ass. Even since becoming a MILF, my ass hasn't gotten huge. I could twerk with practice, but I'm a tits gal with an ass white men used to love about 7 years ago but since the rise of Minaj and the Kardashians don't seem to like as much now. I used to get so many compliments on how hot my ass was but now everyone wants a big jelly roll butt.

All in all though, I am fit and attractive D cup with a toned body and long blond hair and nice lips. I get hit on a lot. My pussy is also not "destroyed" at all. My kids were not big at birth, and I never tore. I snapped back into shape quickly and my husband has a large member that is too big for deep penetration except in certain positions. I can't imagine it is too lose. I keep it groomed but with hair because he clearly is obsessed with hairy pussy.

He told me once before he got so addicted to porn that it turned him on to watch much older women because "no one else wants them but they are still horny."

I definitely haven't been as attracted to him since he lost the promotion because I feel like he was lazy. He could have passed certification with even 3 or 4 extra hours of studying. I always prodded him to study and he would blow up at me and tell me he "had it under control."

Could there be deeper issues at play here?

Now he's in the bathroom "taking a shit", and I can't help but wonder if that means looking at hairy grandma pussy on his cellphone.

>>18510136
That first paragraph you wrote could be part of it. He might feel emasculated around you, but it seriously is above our paygrade. You guys need professional help.

>>18510136
Show him this

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>hairy grandma

>>18510136
Be the coach or better yet be a granny coach. You sound like you're in great shape so maybe just do a wardrobe change and buy a grey wig. Not kidding...if this will motivate him then try it. Seriously if he likes hairy snatch then stop shaving...but here is the catch don't give it to him. Be the coach make him earn it like before you two first hooked up. Just some thoughts to ponder... good luck.

>>18507639
I bet you he gave up when he startes feeling you no longer desired sex from him. It felt like a chore for you

>>18510136
This is way too complex for us. Try therapy. Tell him to go for sure, he sounds depressed with a few issues.

>>18507639
yes. My husband won't give up porn. I would be ok with it if he actually fucked me like he used to but we have not had sex in 6 months. and NO my body has not changed at all he just prefers porn now. Our relationship was never this way when he did not have reliable internet access, he would fuck me multiple times a day.

i know how you feel and its awful.

The worst part of this is that they expect you to be celibate while they jack off to thousands of different women a month. My Husband does not want me to sleep with other people yet he won't fuck me and he spills his seed to other women. It feels like he's cheating on ME.

>>18510136
this is so weird its like your husband is my husband. He also looks at granny porn and has mommy issues. i think this is something that runs deep with our husbands and can really only be fixed by therapy.

He also did not want to have sex with me the moment i became a mother! I think its mommy issues along with porn addiction. I think it would get better if our men stopped looking at porn but its such a hard addiction to beat especially if they have other psychological issues that fuel the porn addiction.

I really feel for you. Do you have a discord or anything? I think it could help us if we talked things out.

>>18512847
Buy a wand keep it under your pillow and use it every night before you go to sleep. Take care of yourself for a while.

>>18507639
If he's been watching porn for many years now, it's very possible that now his brain is wired to be more visual than experimental.
Been watching porn for more than 10 years now, can never get into it during normal sex, can't bond with people because i see them as objects. It's taboo to say it because a lot of guys worship porn and pornstars but overexposure will literally destroy any hope of a healthy sex life.

Better start putting his dick in your ass if you want to revive things

>>18507639
i think it would hep your marriage if your husband stopped both porn and masturbation

try talking to him but you really shouldn't be unfaithful

>>18513915
i advise against this
masturbation isn't good for you

being chaste is better than masurbating or cheating since sex with your husband seems unlikely

that is at least my opinion

>>18507666
I've been through an outpatient group with someone like this. That's not how he feels, there's a good chance that you disapprove of him on many other outlets as well. Frankly how is his life going? The man I saw in outpatient with this problem wanted to be intimate visually, but had problems working with this emotionally. Seek couples therapy, he's not doing this to cheat on you, he could be using this just to establish his own space. I don't know you or him though, I'd say it's worth exploring though.

>>18514601
just to make it clear

masturate instead of cheating if you can't take it anymore but try not to masturbate