I want to get outside more, but I'm not sure where or how

I'm 20, about 20 pounds overweight, and live in a big city near a beach and some hiking trails. Today I went surfing, which is a start. Has anyone been through this process themselves or know a way I can streamline it?

>>18502536

Try joining a sports club if you're into that.
In my country (Australia) that the AFL local teams make a point of going out a lot. It's literally impossible not to see them out on a weekend. Same with the soccer clubs.

If sport isn't your thing try getting a job that forces you to mingle with people. eg. I used to have pretty bad social anxiety too and wouldn't go out much. Ended up getting my bartenders qualification and trust me you get very social on Fridays and Saturdays especially. You'll have some girls flirting for free drinks which is a bonus for your small talk game.

Idk if this is what you're looking for ?

I'm an extreme introvert, but contrary to what 4chan may make you think, this isn't mutually exclusive with having social awareness.

I like to go to coffee shops and read. as long as you don't sperg you'll get to know the staff in short order and may make a friend that way. you could join a pool league or just go to a bar regularly.

the formula for friendships is just consistent interactions over a period of time. pick a place or thing that you can enjoy over a period of time and you'll meet people.

if you're an autist and can't interact with people, get into therapy

>>18502577
Great ideas, thank you. I especially like your sports recommendation; I'll make friends, release stress, and get fit. I'll check what's around me for guys my age.

>>18502583
Good point, I've been expecting friendships to sprout in my first meeting with someone. My mentality would have made making friendships more difficult/stressful and burnt me out sooner. Thank you

>>18502596
exactly right.

when you interact with someone, whether consciously or not, you will broadcast your intentions through countless subtle behaviors that the other person will (consciously or not) pick up on. if someone is desperate for a friend, he or she will communicate that desperation through submissive body language, unnatural conversation choice, and an inconsistent tone. this comes off as inauthentic and drives people away. this is also why pickup artists/red pillers think they have caught lightning in a bottle, where really they are just practiced at feigning an internal landscape that is attractive to a particular type of insecure person.

that you have an expectation from the outset of an interaction is telling. maybe you have more personal issues than you let on(low self esteem, issues with vulnerability, etc.), which would have stemmed from an emotionally disconnected childhood. this is fine; none of these are a lonely death sentence, and each can be dealt with through introspection and therapy.

I could be wrong, but I don't think I am. in the meantime, try to stop playing so many video games if that is your goal

>>18502631
That's painful to read, but you're right. The truth is always more useful than blind ignorance, no matter how rough it is. I can't be foolish enough to blame myself for my childhood nor let it hold me back. A lot of my social anxiety stems from a fear of what people might think of me, but I know that can become a self fulfilling prophecy and make me awkward. People tell me I have a laid back personality and seem collected, but most of the time when I interact with someone I don't know well, I feel uncomfortable with myself and my life. Especially with girls. I've been with more than a few by now, but I'm at my worst around pretty women I don't know well (unless I'm in a good mood and they're friendly). Once I'm comfortable with a girl, I can be very charming. What do you see here? How could I speak to girls I've just met with the same confidence I can to girls I know?