Is it almost always a bad idea to get into a serious relationship

>>18495817
>they would not receive an invitation to my wedding, though I would invite my own parents because they weren't abusive, but are kinda just dickheads.
First of all, you're getting ahead of yourself. Secondly, you can't just unilaterally place a total ban on her family from attending this hypothetical wedding. It's up to her to decide if she would invite them, not you.

That said, if that's how strongly you feel, then do her a favour and don't date her.

>>18495817
someone who has their dogshit family out of the picture or under control? yes. someone who's dogshit family is in the picture and out of control? no.

>>18495846
No, she's not a fan of them either. I have told her that her parents will never be alone with our kids, will never attend wedding etc and I only tell her that because I know she understands why.

I just don't know how hard of a life it's going to be without having grandparents on her side. Part of what I wanted in life was a huge, happy family and I don't see that happening with two sets of parents being absolute shite

>>18495849
Depends on what you mean under control, she recognizes how shit they are but I feel there are going to be arguments around their level of involvement in our lives and our kids lives.

They're stubborn, older people that while my girlfriend understands were absolutely horrible to her, seems to be undecided on whether or not they're going to be in her life in the future.

>>18495852
>I just don't know how hard of a life it's going to be without having grandparents on her side.
> I feel there are going to be arguments around their level of involvement in our lives and our kids lives
Again, this is really up to her, not you alone. This isn't something minor, like what colour car you buy, this is a really significant part of your lives. If you can't handle this, don't date her.

>>18495857
I can't tell you what to do with the specifics over 4chan. You're talking about marriage and having kids. Those are personal decisions to be decided irl.

>>18495871
>>18495865
Yeah of course. I'm more asking about how much of an importance it is to have in-law parents in your life as well as grandparents in your kids lives. I never grew up with great grandparents but it's something I always wanted my kids to be able to have; the ability have a relationship and learn about the people who made their mother such a great person.

>>18495817
I had something similar, I helped her a lot in her life, now she's living pretty good, I feel nice because that's what I wanted.
Now we aren't together.

Bad thing is that I never told her how depressed I was all the time, because did not want her to feel bad about me.

>>18495817
Dog shit ppl tend to stay close to where they shit. If you really like her then all you need to do is move across the country from them. That goes for your family also. You make 1 or at most 2 trips home every year.

>>18495817
>Is it almost always a bad idea to get into a serious relationship with a girl that has a dogshit family? (Abusive parents)
Absolutely. People raised in abusive families tend to be broken in ways that may not be readily apparent or that you'd be willing to overlook in the honeymoon stage of the relationship. After a while their issues (if not resolved) will put a real strain on or even cause the end of the relationship.