Sup /adv/. More of a 'get it off your chest' post but

>>18489498
Recently I got her a job working at the same place I do. And, well, it's been great. She's worked really well and is super appreciative of the opportunity to get ahead after numerous set backs (she's a single mother, dads a loser who's no longer around). Working in such close proximity has awakened many feelings in both of us and I'm now at the point where I know that I'm cheating myself out of something if I deny it any longer. I'm pretty damn sure I love her /adv/, but I owe my partner more than that so I don't know what to do.

Do I leave and pursue happiness, or do I stay and be unfulfilled to not ruin my daughter and wife's lives?

>>18489508
Worth also noting that I have no other close friends to talk to about this so I can only talk to bestie mentioned above which makes it super difficult to get any perspective... fwiw, she's indicated that she feels the same way I do.

>>18489498
Good husbands don't put themselves in compromising situations with women who have a romantic interest in them. Start building a wall with the girlfriend, and start spicing up life with your wife (for your sake, your wife's sake, and your daughter's sake).

>>18489508

do you love your wife? can you be happy and fulfilled choosing your wife?

divorce isn't going to ruin your daughters life. it probably isn't even going to ruin your wives life as long as you do your best to help support her/them in the coming times and be there for them.

divorce has become a natural part of life, its more intense than a break up, but like break ups, everyones got some experience with it at this point.

it will be really stressful for a whole minute, but after that it'll be fine.

This is >>18489543 again

>>18489561
This guy is right, if you're already that far gone, then folks will survive the divorce, but if your marriage has a chance, it's likely worth putting the effort into it. Regardless, you have a child with that person, so you'll have to deal with them for pretty much always - it's easier to raise a child with someone you like / love (which, yes, takes effort). Just because you like this other friend, however, doesn't mean it's worth throwing away your current "pretty good"
spouse. You should at least consider if you might be better off investing in your current marriage and making that amazing (as all relationships take work, even if the current "best friend" seems like it's easy, when you change that dynamic, it will eventually need work/attention as well).

>>18489543
You make a fair point and I have been torturing myself with the same logic: I consider myself a good man, and by extension I am a good partner and a good dad. It's just that there's a lot of baggage there (as you'd expect from a relationship of this length) and due to mistakes, on both our parts, I'm not sure that there's anything really left to save.

>>18489561
This is also good advice, and thank you for that. I guess I'm just feeling guilty about this all - it's not as though we're having an affair, although there's a real chance that could change... my wife is a very introspective, intelligent lady who is very much wrapped up in herself. I'm a very extroverted, giving person who gives, and desperately needs, attention. I think in a way we're incompatible and I also sort of feel that I've been pushing this barrow along with only one wheel for some time...

>>18489580
I know. Everything worth doing is hard, and a great relationship requires a lot of sacrifice & compromise. I get that, but see my post above- I don't know that it's retrievable. And the new (old?) girl is pretty amazing man: I can't stop thinking of her, lord knows I've tried but I'm infatuated with everything about her. She's beautiful, smart, funny and kind. So brave!

Talk about your first world problems! /face palm

>>18489561
You're an idiot if you think it's not going to hurt the child and wife.
You take a child and separate them from the only family it knows. Then mom and dad go off to their respective new partners and drag more strangers into their lives and perhaps more kids. Then shuffle the kid around like luggage until their an adult for visitations. And you think this doesn't impact the child? Stressful for a whole minute? You wonder why society is so fucked up. Yeah, everybody is doing it so it must be right.
Try this, she's a decent person and a good mother. Stay and raise your kid. You picked her. Nobody else did. After she's an adult, then go do whatever you want. It's not all about you.