Maybe a week or so ago, I posted a thread about my bf being strangely

>>18442843
2/2

here it goes
>she sends him private posts of girls sticking fingers in their mouths sexually
>she sends him her selfies and asks how she looks in them and if she should post
>she frequently calls my bf her best friend
>she begs him to go visit her at work which is like 45 mins away (he hasnt)

Bf seems to not be responding flirtaciously, but also not setting boundaries. He usually just responds sarcastically, pretty much as he does with all his female friends.

Upon finding that, I take a glance at texts and phone calls and recent snaps, she is in none of them.

I am fuming at this point. I don't think he's cheating, but like, he's not setting bondaries. This led me to feel super betrayed. I kept thinking, when she finds out she's side chick, she's gonna run straight to my bf and that's gonna be a big stupid thing.

I told bf I looked through his phone and saw convos of him and girl. From there, he didn't even want to hear me. All he did was say I breached his trust by looking through it. Yea, I did. But what he's doing isn't right either? I had a feeling there was something I wasn't gonna like about her and that was it.

Now bf and I are arguing, he barely wants to speak with me. I feel like I did so wrong. I feel fucked that I felt the need to look in his phone. But he was also acting really strange and also claims to see nothing wrong with his friendship with this girl. Like, there are lines being crossed.

Basically, my relationship has turned into a shit show. How do I go about this reasonably?

>>18442843
Also to clear this up, she is a side chick to one of my boyfriend's work buddies.

So that's why I refer to her as side chick

>>18442843
Boy that's a lot to take in. The thing is, he shouldn't be having secrets. You both should be willing to show your phones to one another at any time. Now, I'm not condoning snooping in his phone because you should have asked him for it and done it right in front of him. If he said no, then there's a red flag and you may be justified in snooping.
At this point, you have a betrayal of trust even if the texting was nothing sexual. I would explain all of this. Then try to work through it. If you can't then breakup.

>>18442875
Yea, I so desperately want to talk about it.

It's been days since bf has spoken to me. Finally today, we made plans to talk over the weekend.

Honestly, during the argument, he mostly told me that I broke his trust for me. But like, he also severely hindered mine for him too.

It just feels like talking about it is going to be like defusing a bomb. I don't even know where to start and don't want to turn it into an argument again.

gonna bump this one last time in hopes of more response.

>>18442881
well you're the woman in this relationship so the jealousy and blame game stuff will come naturally to you. but this guy sounds like a dick desu.

prolly you'd be better off with someone who shares your values. best to rip that plaster off quickly than have him push his non-existing boundaries into the realm of infidelity and casual couldn't-give-a-fuckedness

>>18443281
ugh, we've been together for 7 years

it feels so fucking dumb to end it over some dumb girl that was so irrelevant just a few months ago.