Let's say you're on a date with someone and the conversation

best thing you can do is not have some formulaic artifice to bog you down, and instead simply do what feel naturally.

>>18415529
A lot depends on where you are and what you are doing on the date. So, it depends. Obviously if your at a restaurant sitting across from each other it's harder than if you are walking or sitting next to each other.

I always go for the hand holding or arm around the waist. Then wait to see her reaction.

>>18415533
>>18415538
Well, I'm not so autistic that I don't realise context is very important and I do have an idea of how I might operate in my impending situation in various circumstances but it would be nice to hear a few examples

>>cont'd
Then if she returns the favor, I would continue. Assuming things still go well, I like to look at her face to face in the eyes, softly play with her hair and brush it back from her face. I will usually use my hands to hold her face at first for the start of the kiss before moving them behind her head and then down her back to her waist.
I love being held by the back of the head and drawn in while kissing.

>>cont'd
Always smile and look like you are enjoying the moment. You should be but don't look like some grump ass or some smart eleck like she's lucky yo be with you. I look like I'm the luckiest guy on earth.

>>18415533
First of all, this

>>18415538
And this is why you don't do first dates at restaurants

Truth be told, you should initiate touching early on during the first date. Hugging when greeting is naturally the first stage. If you walk through doors together, lead her by touching the small of her back, or shoulders if she's wearing big ass coats. When you sit next to each other, as you should at some point, you should with ease touch her leg (especially if joking, laughing or being impressed and telling her so) don't linger too long, unless there's some definite attraction built up already. Touching increases the attraction though, so avoiding it is basically the same as telling her your not interested in her physically.

Eye contact is very important. This is how you close in with a kiss, and there's no real rules to how soon this is achieved, but it's a good idea to have a good conversation going about things that are actually exciting to the both of you. It can be anything between ambitions or dreams you have, that sparks some imagination or admiration, or it can simply be to talk about how relaxed she makes you feel, and that you're having a good time with her. Linger on her eyes for abour five seconds. If you want to go straight for it, you can look down at her lips for about a second or two. If she looks down at yours, she's already ready to kiss you, but you can play around with it for more build-up. Look at her eyes for about 5-7 seconds more before you look down at her lips again another 2-3 seconds and then back up to see if she mimicks. If she does, what i usually do is tell her "it's alright you can kiss me if you'd like to", or I just lean in (not all the way, she should lean in 10-20% of the way,) - or you can stop to continue the conversation with more touching (hands, arms, legs) for a while longer after the initial eyes-lips-eyes combo.

Also, slow down if she never once touches you back. Women have a tendency to touch arms and legs the most.

>>18415578
Thanks. And I suspect that part won't be a problem for some time unless she completely flips my current perception of her.

>>18415581
This is good advice. I forgot to mention the doors and the touching arms, small if the back etc. the eye contact. Real important

>>18415560
Hair and neck is also good, just don't grab.

>>18415578
and smiling/laughing and generally coming across as you're having a good time and are at ease.

...which brings us to body language, which is also important. Don't sit closed up. Open up you're body, so as to look like you're not trying to protect yourself. One arm resting on the furniture, preferably close to her shoulders/neck, but intimately rather than aggressive. And don't fidget spin or anything like that. Keep your hand calmly resting on your knee/tigh, so you don't look nervous.

Safest is starting with neutral touches. A slight tap on her arm to stress something ("OH I just realize I hadn't even told you this yet, but-"). Not withdrawing your leg or arm if you naturally touch theirs. Grabbing their shoulder for a moment to get their attention in a crowd.

If all goes well, she will most likely (unless very reserved/shy/inexperienced) return touches of the same kind. That's when you proceed to being more grabby than necessary, like putting a hand on her waist to point another direction you want to go into, touching the small of her back for a bit when you usher her through a crowd, pulling her in close if someone wants to take a picture etc.

If two people are awkward/inexperienced it can also happen that tension builds until the kiss. You know when the time to kiss is there when she either holds eye contact for very long or cannot bear it for more than a second, when you are both giddy/flustered/laughing while there is nothing funny (bonus points for nervous laughter at objectively neutral or unfunny things), there's weird tense silences that are not awkward, you both have run out of things to say but neither of you makes any move towards leaving etc.
Then you hold eye contact and tell her you had a great time, or you like her a lot, take a small step forward until you are right up in her personal space, put a hand on her arm or waist and lean in.
Alternatively you call her name or say "wait" or something to create eye contact first, if she's too nervous to meet your gaze (especially if you are sitting next to each other and it can be easily avoided).

Chemistry cannot be forged in every situation. But everyone loves when someone shows real attention and takes a sincere interest in them. Do that, ask question (people drop hints for what they want to talk about), and make sure to mention stuff about yourself if she doesn't ask questions. Think of fitting little bits beforehand, just stuff that glimpses your life, past, personality...

>>18415592
also lead with touching her back/waist as you're about to cross streets/corners and walk up stairs. (It's gentlemanly to walk first up stairs, so you're not looking up her skirt, but let her walk through doors first. Also let her sit down before you do.)

And I don't mean that you should keep your hands on her as you're walking across streets, just do it as a nudge. Most women like to be lead, but never make a point of it. It should just be your natural way around women to initiate walking with touching.

>>18415605
this put a smile on my face. It's good to know there are other anons on this board that actually know how to act around women. no fedora

>>18415605
Post was just too long but flirting is also a hugely important tool. For most people it takes serious practice, but you can use it both to show off attractive qualities about yourself (wit, playfulness, a hint at your sexual persona eg by acting bossy) and balance respect and friendliness.

No woman worth dating is looking for a man who treats her like shit. But great qualities like kindness, respectfulness, patience etc do not arouse much passion in themselves. Think of sex, even if you are making love passionately it isn't just sugary sweet, there's an edge of something wild or aggressive or goofy about it that sets it apart emotionally from cuddling naked. By teasing someone you are showing them that you cannot just be serious and interesting, you can also let loose and have fun with her. You're not just someone who makes her feel at ease and seen/heard, but also someone who can get her riled up and evoke strong emotions in her. Someone who can catch her off guard and make her scramble for a reply.
It is also just sexy to properly let your sexual interest shine through. Women want men who want to fuck them, they just want men who want to fuck them for who they are and not men who want to fuck them because they can. Enough of those around.

>>18415581
This is the kind of input I'm after, thank you anon.

I know the conversation won't be a problem, we can talk for hours. I just worry about kicking it up from there.

The part that kind of muddies the water for me is that this woman is already quite touchy feely with me when I talk to her but I think she is just really attentive to people by nature and I am always left confused about whether or not to take anything as a sign of interest.
She is my yoga teacher btw and thus far the only environment I have been able to converse with her is in short bursts after classes over several months.

It's good that she has agreed to meet me for lunch this weekend, but I just want to make it clear there is romantic interest before things fall into the friend zone.

>>18415533
"Do what feels natural" doesn't work for those of us with so much anxiety and awkwardness and so little experience that nothing feels natural.

>>18415641
Sadly this is true for too many of us.

If I did what felt "natural" I would either pass up the subtle hints of a kiss in favour of a more explicit cue until either the girl got bored of waiting and left or until I found a creative way to just ask her if I can kiss her.

>>18415677
>If I did what felt "natural" I would either pass up the subtle hints of a kiss in favour of a more explicit cue
Make the cue yourself, don't let it just be up to her. Remember, the date and everything it involves, is something you're doing together. There's no you vs her, so just stop with the looking and passing up, and lead her into the right territory, even if it's unfamiliar to you.

>>18415619
>She is my yoga teacher btw
I raised my eyebrow

You're on the right path, anon
> I just want to make it clear there is romantic interest
and so you shall. One thing though, lunch/day game is a slightly different flavour. You probably know her schedule, so during your lunch date, you might want to suggest meeting for drinks one evening you know she doesn't have any classes. I'm on the fence about telling you to kiss her on the first date desu. I'm sure you'd know better than me, from behind the computer screen. Yoga teachers might sure as hell be sexual creatures, but it does depend on the type. For all we know you'll be heading back to her place after lunch. The fact that she's touchy feely is a good sign, and not one that should muddle the water - just play by her game, and it should be easy to escalate.

t. Spent 9 years in my twenties with two women who during that time became yoga instructors. One of them was very sexual, the other one not so much