Have any of you had a GF who has a hard time climaxing? My partner

>>18414185
How long have you guys been dating? Sometimes it takes a little while. Orgasm is partially a comfort thing, so it might take her a while to get comfortable enough with you to let herself go.

That being said, if she told you this:
>Allegedly she's had this problem forever/for a long while
Then I'd take that as gospel. Presumably she knows her own body better than you do, and better than random internet strangers could ever possibly know it (even based on our many, many anecdotal experiences).

My only suggestion: Does she masturbate to get herself off in your presence? If she does, try and pay attention to what she does to get there, and then replicate it. If she doesn't, and instead does it privately, maybe try and encourage her to start doing it in her presence. If her orgasm is being blocked by some shame/self-consciousness thing, then the first step to fixing it will be normalising her orgasm with you, and then before you know it she'll be having it with you.

>>18414185
I struggled to get off because I think too much when someone is fucking me.
It has really nothing to do with you. I really enjoy sex, feel a lot of pleasure, but rarely climax.

>>18414185
Have you tried using any vibrators while having sex? That could help things along.

Also try not to make sex all about the climax. If she feels pressured to cum in order to not hurt your feelings that often makes it 10x harder. Focus on the journey rather than the destination.

>>18414208
I highly doubt she'd be willing to masturbate with me in her presence, as there is a level of self consciousness. Not an insane amount, enough to prevent that though (I'm probably pretty uncomfortable with the idea of doing it myself). I do believe that she's comfortable with just having sex and the journey though that, the root issue is more me having trouble with the whole deal. Comfort (or subconscious comfort) my still be an issue, although we've been having sex long enough at this point that I don't think it's an issue that's at the forefront.

>>18414214
I definitely get that as I can become pretty distracted by my own thoughts while having sex (to the point I've lost erections) on occasion. I think she might be in the same boat as you to an extent.

>>18414229
Toys are certainly something I'm going to be moving towards in the future.
I don't pressure her to come, as I also hate feeling pressured sexually. I was pretty curious originally, I haven;t brought up the situation in a good while however as again, I don't want there to be any pressure coming from me.

>>18414247
>I highly doubt she'd be willing to masturbate with me in her presence, as there is a level of self consciousness. Not an insane amount, enough to prevent that though (I'm probably pretty uncomfortable with the idea of doing it myself).
Ah now you see, that might be the key to solving her orgasm problem. She may have partitioned the part of herself that orgasms away from the part of her that has sex. If there is shame and self-consciousness, even a small amount, that might be enough to throw her off her game, and prevent her from finishing around someone else, or with someone else. There's nothing wrong with masturbating in each others presence. I'm not talking one person jerking it while the other person fully clothed watches, I'm talking the two of you together, as a couple, involving it as part of your sexual play, to your mutual sexual satisfaction. You can do it together, side-by-side, or she can do it as you hold her, after you've finished, while you stimulate her in other ways. It can be pretty hot to watch your partner get themselves off, and you always learn something new to incorporate next time.

That being said, I have no concept of how long you've been dating. It's probably not a first couple of months request if you're both as shy as you seem to be implying. And if you do think better of it later, make sure you couch it in terms of "I'd really enjoy seeing you do this" rather than "I want to fix you and this is how I'm going to do it."

But, as you say, the issue is you 'having trouble with the whole deal.' I guess, until you're willing to take new steps in intimacy, the key thing to remember is what >>18414214 said. It's true for almost every woman:
>I really enjoy sex, feel a lot of pleasure, but rarely climax.
Pleasure isn't necessarily linked to climax for women, certainly not in the same way it is for men.

Good luck.

>>18414247
I am not even distracted, I'm not thinking about the last episode of Game of thrones or something. My thoughts are something like
>Am I doing good?
>Did I shave well?
>Does he like the way I taste?
>God I'm going to kill myself if there's hair around my ass
>Did I shower after the last time I pooped?
>Is he actually enjoying this?
>Do I sound weird if I moan?
>Should I say something?
>Does my back look fat when he's fucking me from behind?
>Does my butt move weirdly?
>God did I just make a weird sound? Fuck I'm going to die.
>Did he see that I actually didn't shave my thighs?

And just really can't orgasm.
It's because I am insecure and stupid as fuck. It is getting better now, but it took me years.

>>18414258
Thanks for the advice and luck, I'll definitely take it onboard.

>>18414266
That's what I mean with distraction, except switch in the various things going through the head of the male.
That all makes sense anyway, so thanks.
Great that you're getting better as well.