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I've been with this girl for a couple years and when the relationship began I wasn't particularly attracted to her physically but thought whatever let it run its course. Basically lost my virginity to her too.
I ended up sexting girls on occasion and got caught every time (where each time getting caught represents not a single text/conversation, but a redeveloped habit of engaging in these conversations regularly). I never had the intention to fuck them I was just a horny male tryna get off, but good luck convincing her of that.
Every time, we almost broke up but reached amends. Things have been ok, but I recently really fucked up and this is where I need advice. She was gone, and I went to a little get together and ended up falling asleep in the same bed as a friend of mine, and we ended up mutually groping each other, light kisses on the neck and such but didn't fuck or make out (fwiw).
While this sucked ass for me emotionally, there was a large benefit hidden under the shroud of my fuck ups. The thing is, that experience completely exhausted any flame of desire I have for any other woman, which has been the root cause of our problems in this relationship on my end (her end being weight gain - she doesn't carry it well, etc). So I'm so positive that things will be perfect - IF she accepts me after the fact. I don't have to tell her, but feel obliged too. I feel the best time to tell her would be after she gets this job, so that she can move out if she wants, but at the same time don't feel right about having sex with her before telling her.
What do? And yes, I know used to be a piece of shit
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>So I'm positive that things will be perfect
Why in the world? First of all, this is a recent development. How can you be so sure that just because your lust for other women is gone for now, it will actually stay gone?
Secondly, you have already shat over her trust. Multiple times. You know what they say about repairing trust etc...
You were not that attracted to her to begin with and she gained weight that is obviously less attractive to you still.
You don't even really mention anything about her or the relationship that would make it obvious that it's worth fighting for.
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>>18412217
for her sake you should break up with her
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>>18412217
Nice one OP! You were the cucker, as opposed to the cucky. That's a rare scenario on this board, and you should be proud
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>>18412235
>>18412235
>How can you be so sure
Well, I'm the only one that can know and understand my feelings, of both that night and my girlfriend, and from that I can be certain.
>Trust
This is what I'm most worried about, it's already shit. And from an evil nihilist perspective, I would likely get the result I want by getting the positive effects from this event (loss of lust) but not the negative (loss of trust) by not telling her about, at least not for the time being.
>Worth fighting for
I didn't think it was necessary to mention it, since the post itself should I imply that I believe it is.
>>18412245
She loves me completely, other than a damaged but recovering trust.
>>18412248
Hey thanks man! Realizing it's not that great was a big deal for me.
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>>18412257
Knowing your feelings you are having now is not the same as knowing for a fact how you will feel a year from now. People aren't mathematical formulas. If you have years of experience having difficulty with sticking to one woman and now you have a come to Jesus moment of insight after actually cheating - yeah sure it's possible that you are right. But the facts that happened make it more likely that your current emotions will fade and you will revert back. Whether it's because of stress, because of still lessening attraction to your girl, because you meet a woman who does things to you like no one has so far, or anything else.
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