How do I cope with the realization, at 27, that I hate the field

Feeling like I threw away my youth is one thing, but I can't stand that I hurt my mom like this.

Just level with them, say you're not happy, and can't get commissions and that's that. No offense but your mom seems fucked, she shouldn't have said that over something like this. You're only fucking 27 you didn't waste your whole life come on man, people change cars in their twenties all the time, your whole family needs to chill out

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>>18408932
My mom paid for me to go to school, and now I'm throwing all of that out the window. She'd do anything for me, and I just feel so ungrateful.

>>18408809
>crap
So do you enjoy art or not?

Honestly, it sounds like you're half-assing it.
>wanted
>give up
>feelings

What if you get over the pain hurdle, start becoming more active in your field and find a specialization that you enjoy? Specialists, people who are very good at something, are always sought for, and find their work to be more enjoyable.

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>>18408809
I don't get it. How are you currently not coping? You're still making it to work and fulfilling your responsibilities, right? You're not spiraling into self-destructive behavior or anything? No heavy drinking, drugs, fighting, binge shopping or isolating?

If you aren't self-destructing, guess what, YOU ARE COPING.

Are you asking us how to not feel bad about it? Fuck you. If we knew how to not feel bad about things that bother us, EVERYONE IN THE WORLD WOULD BE DOING IT. You sowed your fields, now you must reap the harvest. Now you must keep doing what you have to do to survive, and if you have resources left over, you can set yourself down a new career path. Welcome to life.

>>18409048
What he or she said.
Also your education is not a waste. If you got a degree out of it that's half the battle. Most if the time it the experience and the piece of paper but they don't necessarily care what the paper says

>>18408809
You're being very vague about what your real issue with your field is. Did you hit an improvement plateau? Have you not been trying to expand your fanbase? Did you get disillusioned with your prospects?

>>18408970
Is right.

You're going to have an even harder time trying to transfer over, to another field (that may not pay off probably because you seem like a quitter) and your parents won't pay for you to go back to school. Have some perspective.

>>18409108
>You're being very vague about what your real issue with your field is. Did you hit an improvement plateau? Have you not been trying to expand your fanbase? Did you get disillusioned with your prospects?
All three. I feel like I've been in a rut for three years while my friends all soar.

>>18409048
>I don't get it. How are you currently not coping?
I'm not working within the field I wanted to, and I just feel like I've wasted my life with this career choice.

>>18408964
>So do you enjoy art or not?
I haven't in a long time, but I'm stuck with it after investing so much in a degree.

>>18409126
...Hmm, if
>you were making progress and soaring
would you still hate what you're doing? Would you hate it more than, say, computer, costumer service, or factory work?

I don't know what triggered it, but it seemed like you know longer get creatively fulfilled from making art.

>>18409126

Are your friends also artists, or involved in other careers?

>>18408809
I had the same situation - wanted to be an artist but soon I started to hate what I was doing and wanted to give up. Then I realised that if I decided to do something else it'll be the same situation again.

To deal with it I took a short break to focus on what interests me and to recall what was that I liked about art. Loosing passion for my work was the worst thing that ever happened. I literally let my favourite thing turn into nightmare and drain me.

I rewrote my goals and changed my methods because after working in this field a bit I know what doesn't work. Now I'm taking small steps towards my goals and so far it goes well, just don't have too big expectations from the beginning.

So don't give up, it's natural that problems occur when we want to achieve something. I've been depressed for a really long time bc of that, but after hearing how bad some of the successful people I know had it in the beginning it kind of gave me hope. It also made me realise how half-assed I've been my whole life.

>>18408932
>people change cars in their twenties all the time
and more than that, people change careers in their 40s and 50s all the time too

>>18408959
>and now I'm throwing all of that out the window
man I hate this sentiment, nothing is ever wasted. You are who you are today because of those experiences, if you go in a different direction with them then so be it but it doesn't change anything about who you are.

I dropped out of college twice before getting my degree and had many painful experiences, but without them I wouldn't be who I am.

>>18409307
Yeah, artists. Much better than me.

>>18409300
>>18409322
Yeah, I wish I knew. Hate it.

>>18409354
>You are who you are today because of those experiences
Even more reason to regret it.

>>18409392
Have you always had these thoughts of inadequacy? Have you pooled your negative energy into getting better...

Such as...
>adopting a learner's mindset
>taking lessons, drawing from life, etc.
>putting your work out there to be critiqued, actually embracing the critiques (Concept Art forums is a good place)
>actually being smart about how you implement them

You do seem to resent how you're not good enough so that does tell me you care a lot. Whatever that means is up in the air, but is worthy of being explored.

Graphic design isn't art.

>>18409408

So I started to wonder what would happen if we challenged some of these sacred cows? Follow your passion — we've been talking about it here for the last 36 hours. Follow your passion — what could possibly be wrong with that? It's probably the worst advice I ever got.

Follow your dreams and go broke, right? I mean, that's all I heard growing up. I didn't know what to do with my life, but I was told if you follow your passion, it's going to work out.

...

>>18409445

I can give you 30 examples right now. Bob Combs, the pig farmer in Las Vegas who collects the uneaten scraps of food from the casinos and feeds them to his swine. Why? Because there's so much protein in the stuff we don't eat, his pigs grow at twice the normal speed, and he's one rich pig farmer. He's good for the environment, he spends his days doing this incredible service, and he smells like hell, but God bless him. He's making a great living. You ask him, "Did you follow your passion here?" and he'd laugh at you. The guy's worth — he just got offered like 60 million dollars for his farm and turned it down, outside of Vegas. He didn't follow his passion. He stepped back and he watched where everybody was going, and he went the other way. And I hear that story over and over.

>>18409447

So I started to look at passion, I started to look at efficiency vs. effectiveness. As Tim talked about earlier, that's a huge distinction. I started to look at teamwork and determination. And basically, all those platitudes they call "successories" that hang with that schmaltzy art in boardrooms around the world right now, that stuff — it's suddenly all been turned on its head.

It goes like this: we've declared war on work, as a society — all of us. It's a civil war. It's a cold war, really. We didn't set out to do it and we didn't twist our mustache in some Machiavellian way, but we've done it. And we've waged this war on at least four fronts, certainly in Hollywood. The way we portray working people on TV — it's laughable. If there's a plumber, he's 300 pounds and he's got a giant butt crack, admit it. You see him all the time. That's what plumbers look like, right? We turn them into heroes, or we turn them into punch lines. That's what TV does. We try hard on "Dirty Jobs" not to do that, which is why I do the work and I don't cheat.

>>18409445
problems is most people don't have any passions at all, they're all pretending to like something while in reality they just want to chill and not care about anything

>>18409458
...You sure you aren't projecting your own feelings onto everyone else?

>>18409472
I'm just disappointed with society, I study at a very good school, I'm part of a nice community but people around are all walking stereotypes from some millenial-hating article, they just don't care about anything.
I've always wanted to built a better future with likeminded people but everyone's dead inside, soon I'll be as well.

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>>18409521
Like I said, you're projecting and it's really strange that it's so bad that you have to accuse people with a passion of being liars.

Society has always been fairly "passionless" at its surface level. You can't tell what a person gives a fuck about unless you know them well and care for them.

>>18409556
wut
what I said is that people nowadays are apathetic and passion is an overrated term from american self-help books

>You can't tell what a person gives a fuck about unless you know them well and care for them.
I can tell and I don't need to care. social sciences can confirm that.

>>18409622
>wut
You didn't say anything about overrated or american self-help books, only that people pretend to have it. You're really weird. Are you baiting?
>nowadays
Why do you think people are particularly apathetic nowadays?

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>>18409633
they pretend to have it because it's expected to have "passion", be happy 24/7, participate and so on

>Why do you think people are particularly apathetic nowadays?
capitalism

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>>18409670
Seems like you're thinking about the normie version of passion and have overblown this stereotype....well, regardless, you're doing a great job at memeing. Capitalism, ho!

>>18409392
>>You are who you are today because of those experiences
>Even more reason to regret it.
Wow I must say I'm shocked to hear you say this, do you really hate yourself that much?

If that's the case then have you considered your problem might actually be psychiatric in nature? That sounds a lot like depression to me, perhaps you should speak to a therapist.

>>18409676
I thought it's pretty obvious I was talking about normies and their definition of passion and how being surrounded by them kills my spirit

>Capitalism, ho!
it's a system just like any other, but it's main fault is that consumerist society gives us fake sense of fulfillment leaving us empty and clueless about direction we should take in our lives, hence the whole deal about "passion"

>>18409680
Probably.

I don't hate myself. I'm just really disappointed with how I ruined a perfectly good life.

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>>18408809
I studied graphic design for 2.5 years and dropped out kek

>>18410218
I wish I had.

>>18409717
>it's a system just like any other, but it's main fault is that consumerist society gives us fake sense of fulfillment leaving us empty and clueless about direction we should take in our lives, hence the whole deal about "passion"
Kek, what a moron. The reality is that some people can be passionate about something while other can't. It's the people's fault, not the system. As always though your self-attribution bias attributes your failures to the system, while your successes to your "muh passion"

>>18408809
>I wanted to be a graphic designer
Fuck mate, currently ending the third year of my graphics design high school and freaking out over not having chosen the right path. My idea was to just go to college and go further into programming (as we do learn webprogramming here) but now that we've had it I realize I'm absolute shit at it. Ontop of that I'll probably fail math and have to redo the entire year (meaning I'll graduate high school when I'm almost 21).

I was planing on going into science but mom convinced me to go here because I'm oh so good at art. Now she demands I finish up this school since I'm already so far.

>>18410218
What do you do now?

>>18411074
You're only 17. You'll be fine. I've already wasted my youth on this shit.

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>>18411087
but there seems to be no way out already

I understand how you feel. I studied criminal justice but i don't think i'll do well in my career. It's sort of interesting, but nothing i'm truly passionate about. My mom also has high hopes for me. She always thinks i can do well in anything. She believes in me but i can't even believe in myself. I would recommend you sit with your mom and have a heart to heart about what you are going through. I don't think you should give up completely yet. Do you network?