My ex thinks I'm crazy and a bad person and that I need

>>18404411
if any clarification is needed just lmk

Good and bad is subjective. She's the one that had to deal with your obsessiveness/stalking so it was worse for her than it was for other friends. She had to worry about her own safety. Maybe she didn't need to, maybe the most you wanted was to talk. I don't know the specifics, but if that's what she was mostly complaining about, I wouldn't worry too much. Just remember you don't necessarily "deserve" an explanation from someone who doesn't want to talk to you anymore. Repeatedly messaging them is harassment, and can be scary regardless of your intentions. It is a bad thing to do, but doesn't ultimately make you a bad person. Try to be more conscious of how your actions affect others instead of acting based on how you feel.

>>18404411
You probably weren't that bad until you didn't accept the break up. Accept the break up and if you can move and start a new life.

>>18404441
>Try to be more conscious of how your actions affect others
by the logic he should've got an explanation

>>18404441
>She's the one that had to deal with your obsessiveness/stalking so it was worse for her than it was for other friends. She had to worry about her own safety. Maybe she didn't need to, maybe the most you wanted was to talk.

Yeah. Its just so weird to me that people can be so close and trust each other so dearly and be afraid of that same person just. But I understand.

>Just remember you don't necessarily "deserve" an explanation from someone who doesn't want to talk to you anymore. Repeatedly messaging them is harassment, and can be scary regardless of your intentions. It is a bad thing to do, but doesn't ultimately make you a bad person. Try to be more conscious of how your actions affect others instead of acting based on how you feel.

Everyone told me not to do it but I thought I knew better like an idiot. I didn't mean to harass her. I just I dont know.

>>18404455
Well she told me to delete her number and that she never wants to see me or talk to me again.

Hearing that helped me accept it. Its a bit stupid that it took something that extreme to get it through my head.

But yeah. I dont want to be with her anymore. Atleast thats how I feel now. I want to move on. I want to be happy.

>>18404467
First gf break up was hard on me and I did a little begging and humiliated myself but it was because it hurt my ego. I sucked it up and cut contact myself and since then will always cut contact if it appears the relationship isn't working. Hurts for awhile but you can keep your pride intact. If someone doesn't want you it doesn't matter the reason, they just don't want you so why spend any more time and effort.

>>18404411
>>18404467
Well you've got your closure now atleast
I'm assuming you guys had one last spat and thats it. she told you to leave her alone and never talk to her again.

>>18404459
For real, at least he'll be a higher standard then her fuck people who don't give closure

>>18404411

>>tfw i still fear my stalker ex trying to hurt me or bring pain into my life.

What you did was traumatizing to her. It can take years to heal from the feeling of constantly looking over your shoulder. Changing/deleting all of your accounts and worrying he might find them again.
Using call blockers just in case hes using a fake number.

Even if you did love her, something about the relationship was unhealthy before the break up.
You need to look at yourself carefully and access what kind of bf you really were to her.
Did you isolate and control her?
Did you used guilt to force her to do what you want?
Did you threaten to hurt yourself when she wanted to leave?
These are just some of the forms of emotional abuse.
Having been on the other side of that, I imagine my ex probably thought he was just expressing his love too, but my depression became such that i wanted to kms to escape him.

You should move on, and don't ever do those things to someone again. If she wants to leave, let her go

>>18404837
>Having been on the other side of that, I imagine my ex probably thought he was just expressing his love too, but my depression became such that i wanted to kms to escape him.

Its funny she said the exact same thing.
I guess I've just been too closed minded. This was my first relationship and I didn't know what the fuck I was doing. I did do some of those things. Maybe I was emotionally abusing her. But at the same time it felt like I was being emotionally abused the same way and I took out my frustration on her which only made it worse.

It sucks living on such a tiny island. I live in Hawaii and everything is so close together that its impossible to get away from anything that reminds me of her. Everywhere I go everything I do seems like a constant reminder.
My friend currently up in Yosemite offered to give me some housing and a job for a few months.
I kind of want to get away from here. I'm not sure yet.

>>18404901
Go for it dude. I'm assuming youre college age, just know that college can wait. Go find yourself.

>>18404411
>>18404776
>>18404459
what is this closure meme no one owes anyone anything.