Why some men act like they're really into someone and then

>>18389676
Self preservation

>>18389676
perhaps you think friendliness is hitting on you?

>>18389676

Survivalism

>>18389694

>I have a boyfriend

>>18389684
I meant even if you knew she might interested in you as well?
Why don't you just say yes. Is that why men being single?

>>18389713

>Self-preservation

>>18389719
But why

And then they say women are complicated

>>18389727
Yes, I was in this situation where he act like he's really into me, fond of me. But after that no texts no phone calls nothing at all.
So I asked him straight forward that if he's like me.
HE SAID NO. GODDAMN IF HE GROW A BALL AND SAID YES HE WILL HAVE A GF THE NEXT DAY

>>18389726

Because far too many men have thought;
>>18389713
>she might interested in you as well?

And learned a harsh harsh lesson.


Seriously. If I learned anything from my teenagers years, it's these two most important lessons for survival in a modern feminised world;

>First of all; Women can literally be offended about someone liking them romantically. The nicest woman you know can turn into a viscous bloodthirsty cunt at the drop of the hat if she even suspects that you like her.

Secondly;
>There is absolutely no such thing, as a sure thing.


Though, there is one more lesson I learned, as a "creep" all those years ago.

>It's better to have a woman thing you're an ignorant, self obsessed, uninterested and distant asshole than it is for her to ever think that you like her.

So yeah. Self preservation.
Can't take the risks these days.

>>18389726
>>18389727

The easiest response I can level out to the OP is that there are some men who are attracted to women--such as the OP in this case--but may not act on their feelings because they either lack wealth and/or whatever else would be necessary to sustain a typical modern relationship---even more so if they're at a point in life where attempting to date may be largely impractical.

or something---

>>18389740
>It's better to have a woman thing you're an ignorant, self obsessed, uninterested and distant asshole than it is for her to ever think that you like her.
The thing is: every one can see through that you like this girl. Like you literally done things that only for someone you interested in. So it's not like it is a secret anymore. Why didn't you just say it out like a man?

>>18389700
what does that have anything to do with what either of us said? you clearly have mental instabilities.

>>18389761

Because then it is certain.

I'd prefer people to have their unconfirmed suspicions than to know for sure.

Plausible deniability and all that.

Again, it's just us covering our asses.

>>18389768
OP here
That's not me. Fuck that mental illness, I don't have a boyfriend and I'm seriously asking questions here

>>18389771
Why's it that complicated?
Will the table turn around and you'll keep chasing her or/and wanting a relationship with her after you say no?

>>18389779
>Why's it that complicated?

Because I'd ideally like to protect myself, my social standing, my reputation.

Not be labelled a "creep" and have people wary around me. Not having people talking about me behind my back.

Can't be showing weakness or giving people any ammunition.

>Will the table turn around and you'll keep chasing her or/and wanting a relationship with her after you say no?

I'll keep wanting her and I'll happily ride out the crush till the feelings go away but I sure as shit am not gonna take any unnecessary fucking risks until I'm certain it can't backfire too badly.

>>18389791
>Not be labelled a "creep" and have people wary around me. Not having people talking about me behind my back.
I didn't know being a man can ve that tough

>I'll keep wanting her and I'll happily ride out the crush till the feelings go away but I sure as shit am not gonna take any unnecessary fucking risks until I'm certain it can't backfire too badly.

As long as you really like someone I see.
Why people keep doing this to themselves? Why can't just be forward and not giving a fuck about this society?

>>18389779
If, when asked, the guy had told you "yes, I like you" would you have had sex with him? Would you have kissed him? Told him you like him too? In my experience what you do is to start giving him tests to decide if you like him back since you already know he likes you.

Whenever a woman asks if there is anyone you like she has absolutely no intention of reciprocating if at that momment you tell her the truth.

>>18389826
>I didn't know being a man can ve that tough

It is.
Especially if you have autism. I've learned to manage with it though.

Most guys are not as cautious as I am. I had it a little tougher than they did.


>Why people keep doing this to themselves? Why can't just be forward and not giving a fuck about this society?

I'm happy being alone. I don't need to have my guard up, assimilate. I can relax.

Being around a girl I like. I have to be careful about everything I do because I don't want her to catch on.

As for why I can't just "not give a fuck about society?", it's because like everyone else inside it, I am dependant on it.

Trust me, if I could run off and live in the woods comfortably, I would.

>>18389832
>In my experience what you do is to start giving him tests to decide if you like him back since you already know he likes you.
Actually it's quite true. I don't think I would say I like him too but I'll give him hints or give him chances to approach me
What women wants is their safe card. And what men wants is their pride.

>>18389847
Off the topic but how do you know you have autism?
I suspect I'm autism as well. Can you give me some of you symptoms?

>>18389858

Don't like eye contact, poor motor skills (Terrible at bat + ball type sports), have trouble explaining things to people (in person anyway. I can write well enough).

Never felt comfortable with physical contact.
Also, strong difficulty reading people.

I've been slowly adjusting by managing these symptoms.

I tolerate eye contact, juggle to improve motor skills, try to over-explain less, tolerate physical contact (try not to move away from it - though I never initiate it), and practise making small talk with cashiers at shops.

I hide it well.

>>18389849
>I don't think I would say I like him too but I'll give him hints or give him chances to approach me
Well fuck you for expecting a person to become vulnerable to you in exchange for literally nothing, you said woman want their safe card and men want their pride, well you want him to let go of his pride but to keep your safe card, that is fucked up.

>>18389676
Let me tell you a story OP. In 9th grade I thought high school was going to be different. I liked a girl. Someone asked me if I liked her, I said sure. That person then told everyone. It's to protect yourself.

Besides, she should be the one approaching me instead of her friend. If I acted interested, there would be no challenge, and the girl on average would lose interest. If women could just be honest, it would save both people time.

>>18389869
Oh fuck. This is totally me.

-I don't like small talk, I'll be awkward.
-I can be a lone for days without saying a word and it's just fine
-I never good at sports, not even tenis. I rarely hit the ball
-I feel irritated if men show me their affection
-I felt irritated when I have to go to parties. Even enjoy being alone at parties or at a smoking area at night club
-I don't want to talk much
-I never wanted to be touched. If I walk on the street and somehow people bumped into me on my wrist or my arms I feel the need to swipe it right away

All the year I just thought it's my personality. I always know something is wrong with me I just can't tell

>>18389874
>

Men are supposed to be better than women, so they can afford to take the hit to their ego--because they're stronger in a sense...

That's underlying idea as to why it is men who do the heavy lifting in courtship.

>>18389886
This.
This is why men was born to be the chaser

>>18389886
That's retarded. Relationships are supposed to be 100-100, you're expecting him to put more effort into it.

>>18389910

I didn't make the rules--nature did.

>>18389922
That doesn't make any sense.

>>18389924
TOTALLY makes sense

>>18389989
Okay, how?

I've been in this situation before - where I've kinda liked a girl, but I honestly haven't liked her with enough certainty to put our emotions on the line.

For example, this wonderful girl used to like me that worked for me back when I was 22. Not only was I strictly forbidden from dating anyone I worked with at any level, she was also way more "innocent" than I was. She hadn't had a boyfriend, she hadn't had sex, her interests were just very... pure. On the other hand, I was a lot more experienced, drank and partied a lot, that kind of thing. While we had a lot in common and I did sweet things for her, she never would have worked for me. I would have torn her apart. So I ended up never reciprocating her feelings in a clear way.

Similar situations have presented themselves... Some where I feel that maybe I'm misinterpreting the signals and will get my feelings hurt more putting myself out there than just keeping them shut.

>>18389676
fear of rejection, social coward

Guys have feelings too. It's easy to forget that

>>18389737
Probably bc he didn't like you and was honest with you before things got out of control

>>18389737
Maybe he tried you and didn't like ?

>>18390358
I didn't say I don't like him
In the very beginning we met he already told me he liked me. But never made a move. So I asked him for confirmation and he said no