/adv/, how do I "get out" more? I'm a 25 year

>>18381147

if there is literally nothing to do where you are then find a mode of transportation into the city. if thats too difficult or takes too much time then thats your own problem then, we can't move the world around you.

>>18381147
I think the biggest hurdle for you is because you don't own a car which really cripple your ability to get out more. Transportation is important, even if you live in a good city with every single thing available within walking distance, you eventually will have to get out to somewhere further.

>>18381152
and do what? I kind of feel overwhelmed & anxious when I go into the city, especially if I don't have a reason for being there, you know? Like I feel kind of weird just wandering around.

>>18381163
it definitely is. unfortunately I can't afford one though, and ubers & cabs are expensive.

>>18381147
Same here bud.
You know what I did.
I got online friends

At first I thought there was something wrong with being a hermit. All the "enjoy your youth while you can" seems so stupid for me.
I prefer to form genuine relationships that will last me for years on end not drunk nights with quick fucks or parties where you don't do anything special and only do drugs

There must be a place where you can meet people in ur area but you gotta make the effort if you feel lonely OP

I didn't like the effort part so I got online friends. That's all friendo gecko

>>18381170
Go save money and get a good used car that you can afford. It may works wonder opening lots of opportunities for you and you might start have reasons to wander around another cities.

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>>18381172
how do you even make online friends? I'm assuming you didn't meet them on 4chan

>>18381188
Unfortunately I'm currently unemployed & a student--working on getting & got a few things lined up to make some scratch in the coming weeks but nothing solid

>>18381195
Oh I did meet them here actually, but we all have goals and aren't druggies and shit.

There's actually pretty normal and good people around here too (otherwise you and me wouldn't be here right?)

Aah... we have an art group actually so it's not like we don't do anything. We all have drawing and painting in common. so do the same


Make a list of your interests and hobbies and make a list of where you can go near. If you can't find a place close enough go online (that's what I did)
Less work and less effort but also less contact.

What you give, you take

It takes work to make friends but when you find genuine good people you are investing, not losing.

If you are also introverted (like me) it could also help you as practice (the online thing I mean)


There must be some activity you want to improve right? Some skill some interest some knowledge some something

So get out and search for people like you, good hearted people who just want to enjoy life in a nice way

>>18381170

>and do what

whatever you want. we can't design a personality for you. write down a list of things you like and start googling around the broader interests.

for instance if you are a nerd then the city is going to have comic / game shops that host weekly events. here in LA we have one that hosts a weekly movie night where you're expected to talk during the movie, as well as magic the gathering tournaments and wiiU tournaments and the like.

if your answer is
>IM A NERD BUT I DONT LIKE THOS SPECIFIC THIGNS

then you need to open your mind. other nerds will go and by trying something new oyu'll have the chance to tlak about interests closer to yours and find people who connect.

i go to anime meetups even though i dont watch a lot of anime, because the people there tend to like other stuff i do like.

>>18381226
>Oh I did meet them here actually, but we all have goals and aren't druggies and shit.
really? kind of surprised. still though, I'm not sure how relationships would form on here...like you seem like a nice enough dude but I can't exactly be like "we should go grab a beer some time!" you know?

And yes there are definitely things I'm interested in learning/improving upon but I'm really anxious about seeking those kinds of groups out...almost as if I'll show up and be ostracized because I'm not already part of "the group" or because I'm so bad at it and everyone else is so far ahead of me if that makes sense

>>18381255
similar to what I responded to the anon above you, there's definitely things I'm interested in but I'm kind of anxious about checking these things out because my interest in said subject might not be as deep as the other members or they might not like me or something. For example I almost joined my schools board game club this past school year where they meet once or twice per week and play board games but I didn't because I didn't recognize the names of any of the games and didn't want to end up ruining the game night or slowing it down because I don't know the rules

>>18381276

then you need to stop complaining. you have created a box where you cannot and will not try anything that isn't specifically catered to you, and if i had to wager you'd even come up wtih an excuse like 'im too nervous to meet people' once it got to that kind of scenario.

so congrats, you dont have to go out and do anything. just continue to sit in your little box and never ever interact iwth anyone because you'rea fraid of 'slowing down game night' as iff there arent always other people coming in and learning for the first time too.

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>>18381303
what the fuck dude, it's not that I "cannot and will not try anything specifically catered to me" it's that I don't necessarily want to be somewhere if I'm not wanted?

I'm really not bad with meeting people...I'm able to make conversation. I just don't like my presence being a burden on people.

>>18381315

you calim that direactly but everything else you've said in this thread points to what i said.

that unless you find a situation thats specifically catered to you you will make up an excuse.

its an open fucking game night where new people are not only welcome but encouraged dude. if those people wanted a PRIVATE fucking experience they would just invite ONLY their close friends to their home.

but you are insisting that you shouldn't go because you would have to learn how to play.

think about it.

I don't know how to "just get out lol" either, all I can think to do is take the train to Atlantic City and wander around on the beach acting like I've got some reason to be there. Maybe gamble, maybe double $20 or so and buy myself some overpriced drinks and consider working for the wheelchair pimp because my life is in the shitter.

>>18381147
What's wrong with a little solitude and R&R? If you can't be happy alone then you have serious problems. You don't have to be Captain Personality every damn day. You get precious few moments anymore to have any peace and quiet, I'd say enjoy it. Start a home improvement project. Read a book. Watch a Terrantino movie. There's nothing wrong with having a lazy day. Quit being so uptight. Enjoy it fruit cup. You won't get many of them if you're a working man.

>>18381814

>whats wrong with a little R&R

he literally said he doesn't do anything social other than go to the bar with his roommate once in a while.

whats wrong with wanting to go out?

>>18381814
>If you can't be happy alone then you have serious problems.

I feel like putting you into a locked room. You must be a normie if you can't understand. Probably claim you're introverted while partying.

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>>18381528
I feel you anon

>>18381814
nothing is wrong with " a little solitude and R&R" but being alone almost all day every day is quite honestly a little upsetting. I rent an apartment so what home improvement project am I going to do? I watch movies all the god damn time.

Also if anyone gives a shit about an update, I went for a walk for about three hours and made it somewhere actually kind of nice and went along the canal. It was kind of enjoyable, although I was still lonely.

>>18381170
>Like I feel kind of weird just wandering around.

That's an awesome feeling desu. No obligations to anyone, the freedom of shit to do and not having to explain yourself to anyone.

>>18383506
>Another fucking normie.

>>18381147
It's also a beautiful Sunday. I really need to buy heavy curtains.

>>18381226
You're a fucking solarian dude.

You and your friends only view each other. And you are afraid of "seeing" everyone.

HOBBIES!!!

Buy a guitar. Buy a piano. Buy a book on making something! Who knows what it could be!

I recently started making Kombucha and other fermented fruits and vegetables!

Maybe find a community garden. Get a car and become an Uber driver. You'll be able to pay the car off with what you make drivingand YOULLL HAVE A CAR TO GO DO STUFF!!!

IDK

Want a social life? Go do things. Find a hobby. Get a dog and a Frisbee, go to the park. Take courses in things that interest you. Make friends at your local coffee spot. Take yoga classes. Go to church if you're spiritual. Go to university lectures. Go to art gallery openings. If kinky sex is your thing, go hang out at fetish places and events for whatever kink you have. Start a business. Get a part-time job or volunteer--working with the public, you wind up meeting a LOT of people.

Don't be intimidated by other people. Human beings are social creatures.

>don't be intimidated

That's easy for you to say.

>>18381147
>I'm a 25 year old male

You're fucked. You've passed the threshold.

>>18385103
threshold for what

>>18385245
The moment that where the lack of experience and diminishing opportunities starts to work against you.

>>18385333
yikes

>>18385991
Yikes indeed. Also I got trips, pay your respects.

>>18382315
Get a , join a club, idk do something.

>>18384225
Probably need to pass my driving test first.

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>>18387324
You're 25 and havent passed a driving test? There's something to go and do!

And seconding this guy >>18381255
Find some kind of meetup with your interests. Theres even a site called meetup where you can find that shit in your area. Doesnt matter if youre a noob either. As long as you arent a dickhead, nobody will care. Unless THEYRE dickheads, so then you dont hang out with them after that.

And is there not like a bus or train you can take into the city? Get on top of that shit. Uber and taxi are definitely too pricey, especially since you're saving up for a car (if you arent, then you should be, unless youre in like NYC or similar)

>>18387466
Also, seconding everything here >>18384250

>>18384217
I never said I had only online friends
Why would you assume my whole world.
I have only two friends though irl so you may be right. But what is wrong with that?
Just because I don't like to have whole circles of people as friends, it doesn't mean there is something wrong with me it just means I have chosen a different path


And mind you, these two friends would kill with me and for me. I talk about real friendship here