Hey /adv/ I'm stuck. I've been with my current BF

>>18354910
Try telling him what you just said. If you can't, then maybe your relationship isn't so great.

Since this sounds important to you, I'd give him a chance to sort himself out. Love does wonders.

>>18354918
I've gotten so emotional and distressed that I just give him the hard truth sometimes and he just takes it. I tell him pretty much the same shit I posted. I'm not shy, nor am I soft spoken. His mannerisms won't change , ultimately id just be changing who he is, and he doesn't deserve that. I'm lashing out because of my unhappiness and it isn't fair.

>>18354910
I would break it off and see if he starts changing. A girl I use to be in a relationship with I was doing kind of terrible I was mostly about sex and half assing conversation but after it I learned to kind of take in her interests talk to her more and advance my life to at least hope she would want to be with me.

Sadly it seems like she is interested but only if I live where she is at (different country)

>>18354924
That sounds like your relationship is already over. You shouldn't have to settle for someone that doesn't actively try to improve their life, especially when the only positives you've given are "he loves me and we get along".

>>18354910
You're 20 years old. If you really don't like where your relationship is heading then it's time to move out. It's going to be for the best I think.

He sounds like those people that are happy living simple lives. A basic job, not thinking too hard about hard stuff and emotions, and shit. Even though he says he's unhappy with his workplace, he's probably happy living his life like that. It's completely ok, and the fact that you qualify his desire for a simple life as a "manchild" thing tells me you're not fit for eachother.

It's completely fine for both of you. You both want different things in life, and don't feel attracted to people that don't share your "destination".

You've got to soon accept that it isn't working out. You appreciate him as a person, but you can't stay with him if you think so ill of his choices in his lifestyle. Some people just don't want your help and are content where they are.

>>18354910
You're not stuck. Unless you are chained to the floor of that apartment, you're free. You're held back only by your attachment to the people near you and the things you have where you are. You CAN leave, and you should. You came from somewhere. Go back there. If that place doesn't exist anymore, reach out to a relative for temporary help until you get back on your feet.

The sooner you do this, the better. 20 is too young to be getting so deep into this kinda crap. Don't waste your best years on a person who isn't right for you. And definitely don't let something as trivial as a lease keep you there. You can get out of those. Talk to your landlord.

>>18354924
He needs to be steered towards a MOCC path or a community college path to advance his life into marriage material(University is a joke btw dropped out and ended up wasting time). He needs to realize you can not be with someone e who is on a path to nowhere to raise children.

There's attachment and the fact that I probably won't find someone who's as easy going and patient with me plus if I end it it's going to be a long, awkward process of moving back across the country and I'll be leaving behind all the friends I've gained here. I'd start completely over but for about a year now I've been depressed for the first time in my life because every day feels like this isn't right but I'm too far in. He doesn't have the same interests as me. I'm tattooed with a sleeve and many big concealed pieces and he doesn't care for tattoos (I'm an artist that designed all my own pieces and it's a big part of my identity ), I was 320 lbs when he and I met and I've completely lost all that weight in less than a year so I'm thinner now and I'm pretty sure it's not his ideal. He eats like a pig and it bothers me how little he cares that I'm the one who cleans up after his mess. I'm just rambling out my thoughts at this point. Thankyou for everyone's advice so far ...

>>18354948
God you're so right but I'm so hesitant to jump because it's like if I do move out and cut it off, this chapter that was supposed to be exciting and evolving as an individual will be done..

I strongly suggest you to break up. I was in exact same sotuation with my gf. We lived together 10 years. Last years were awful so we broke up. And im still childish and dont want to advance in life. Im like 95% sure he wont change considering your description of him.

>>18354910
Break up. Like now. It will get only worse.

And when he ask why, tell him how he doesnt want to do anything with his life. Maybe thix experience will kick him in ass to start doing something. But you will be long gone then.

Break up.

>>18354910
He won't change--manchildren have little incentive to do so. Leave. Or just cheat and get what you really want on the side until you can more practically separate from him.