How are you supposed to trust guys to have unprotected sex with

Why are you dating him in the first place if you don't trust him?

You don't get into a fight expecting to lose.

If you think there's a chance he's going to cheat on you, you have bigger problems.

>>18325916
No matter how much I like a guy I know they're human and therefore imperfect. Most guys would cheat on you no matter how much they feel for you

Most people who are cheated on trusted their partner and would never have believed that their partner would cheat on them. But it happened

You can NEVER tell whether they're likely to cheat on you or not

>>18325918
This.

Anyway make him a do std test and you good to go

>>18325918
I don't think he definitely will cheat on me, I just know there's always a significant chance

>>18325913
For the same reason why he knows my passwords, my bank account info and he has the keys to my house.
I love him, and trust him, and don't doubt that he will always do his best to protect me.
There's a chance that he'll get into my facebook to stalk my stuff, or empty my bank account, or steal my tv but I don't think he will. There's a chance he'll cheat, but I don't think he will.

>projecting

>>18325923
>significant chance
Why is the chance significant? Are you a bad girlfriend, is he a bad boyfriend, or do you just have issues?

>>18325921
> make him a do std test

That would only show that he's currently clean, then he might catch something and give it to me

>>18325928
Because the chance is significant with all men, they are prone to temptations. Even if they have feelings for you they might still cheat on you

>>18325933
Why do you think so? Holy shit, you're basically the female version of a /r9k/ bitter virgin.

>>18325913
kinda related question
I had unprotected sex with a girl from my uni. whom I never talked to before yesterday.
It was totally on the spur of the moment, we took a cab together, she asked to come into my room, we were horny but I told her I have no condom, after 30 seconds of silence she touched my chest and we fucked anyway. And it was amazing.

But Wtf do I do now, she's from a rich family so I doubt she has STDs or is trying to trick me to have kid with her or sth like that

>>18325913
Funny enough I can't trust girls to have unprotected sex, not because STDs but for having to trust they take the pill always.

>>18325939
Make sure she takes the day after pill, get a STD test.

>>18325938
Men cheat, it's something they're prone to do. It's very common and the girls they cheat on never see it coming.

>>18325920
Yeah, you can. Ask if they've ever been cheated on themselves by someone they thought they loved. Someone who knows that pain isn't going to turn around randomly and cast it on another.

>>18325933
What makes men different from women then? How are men more likely to cheat than women?

And before anyone gets on my ass for asking this, I'm also female.

>>18325944
Women cheat as well. It's very common.
And, as someone who has been cheated on, you see it coming and ignore all the signs because you are retarded and in love.
Get over your trust issues. You're flawed, not him.

There are a lot of men out there who would never cheat.

>>18325913

I was pretty stupid about and let him do wahtever he wanted to me? I was so lucky because he was clean and actually loved me even though before we got together he's fucked a ton of other girls without protection. I didn't know what I was doing because I'm stupid and was a virgin... got so lucky though hahah. Girls, please learn about this shit. Not everyone escapes death like I do.

>>18325948
Well in studies men cheat more than women, but women cheat a lot too.

People cheat on their partners a lot.

>>18325954
I never said that women don't cheat as well.

I've been cheated on and never saw any signs, ever.

I'm sure there are men who would never cheat, but they are indistinguishable from the ones that do.

>>18325948
Testosterone. Biologically, men are designed to desire sex with different women.

>>18325957
So why are you bothering with relationships at all?

>>18325958
Pretty sure you are dumb.
It's really easy to tell the signs that you are being cheated on. Especially after it happens once, you should be able to tell.

>>18325966
>Especially after it happens once

Yeah except OP was to catch on before it happens so she don't get STDs up her hooch.

>>18325963
Companioship and sex. But at least if they cheat on me I won't catch any STDs.

>>18325963
need dicks

>>18325960
So why do women cheat?

>>18325966
>>18325969

>Yeah except OP was to catch on before it happens so she don't get STDs up her hooch.

Exactly.

>>18325970

But like, I guess you can tell if the man is a slut right? Wandering eyes, obvs has experience, extra pushy or demandy about no condoms should be red flags?

>>18325974
They can cheat on you without exhibiting any of those behaviours.

Humans are flawed, they're prone to make mistakes and do things they regret.

>>18325969
If you have been cheated on (and OP has), she should be able to see the signs.
If it happened to her a lot and she never saw it coming, then she's pretty dumb. Really.

>>18325913
>How are you supposed to trust guys to have unprotected sex with you?
maybe the real question should be how are you suppose to trust guys to have sex with you at all.

>>18325972
Usually because someone better shows up, or because they want to get validation.

>>18325979
>If it happened to her a lot and she never saw it coming, then she's pretty dumb. Really.

Well if I am indeed 'dumb' then the only thing I can do to protect myself is to not have unprotected sex with partners in case they do cheat, because there's nothing I can do about my level of intelligence but there is something I can do to protect my health.

Also as that anon said even if you saw the signs that he was cheating it would be too late to protect yourself from STDs as he has already cheated on you and is now exhibiting the signs of it.

>>18325978
Do you see the error in your thinking?

You literally just said people are perfect at being imperfect. Unless you're oblivious, the signs will show. Why does he have access into all of your stuff, anyway? Do you have the same for him?

This kind of attitude is probably going to push him to cheat lol

>>18325986
STDs are much rarer than you think, and have less consequences than you think.
If you are so scared, just avoid sex in general.

>>18325920

Ahh girl, you have some trust issues. It's not a bad thing and you should protect yourself. I hope you can find a guy who is worthy and will be 100% honest with you always.

>>18325971
>need dicks

I feel this on so many levels. So true

>>18325988
>This kind of attitude is probably going to push him to cheat lol

Sadly, I do agree

Some people trust their partners because of certainty, some have faith, some do it with foolish blindness. There is no way to teach yourself to trust someone, there is no way to forcefully develop trust, so to answer your original question, you can't. You either do or you don't. After reading this thread you obviously don't.

This puts you in an awkward and unfortunate position, because you're going to have to explain this to your boyfriend. Or you lie to his face, but this would be a rather cunty thing to do. Either way both of these things are not liable to end well. Good luck.

>>18325999
Nice trips.

Isn't that weird? I've seen that situation happen too many times. The girl starts pressuring the guy, he starts wondering if he even can land other chicks anymore or if this is the final one. Ideas of her lording the relationship over him like a stake she can pull out at any point lead to an inner disgust that starts to build. Now he's more distant, tries to avoid conversation, starts going on his phone around her more or even goes into the bathroom just to be away from her. Ends up finding someone sub par on the side, does the dirty and then feels the regret of being a shit again immediately.

Relationships aren't set up well and the whole dating game that's been going on for the last 200 years needs fixing. If it takes two people to agree to get into one, it should be a joint decision to leave, not one side's. As in if you're going to get into one with someone, it should have a set time limit so that at the end, you can choose to renew the edition or return it to it's owner. This way, if they cheat, you know it's going to end anyway. If not, keep on renting.

>Blockbuster, the dating store!

>>18326010

This.

Trust is a decision. Of course no one can be sure whether or not their SO might cheat, but in a committed long term relationship you choose to trust your partner and then act like it. Sometimes it pays off, sometimes it ends badly, but a relationship without trust is pointless and worth nothing. If you can't bring yourself to make the decision to trust your partner, then don't bother with relationships, because it is not fair to your partner and it is not fair to you to always live in doubt.

It's nice to see this thread from the opposite point of view for once.

Though if I knew I'd be lumped in with every dude ever by proxy, I wouldn't have bothered being loyal all this time.

Just kidding, I would've, because that's me. But dang, it does suck for people to assume you're a piece of shit because of whatever group you belong to.

>>18325913
Really sounds like a you problem.. 1 in 4 americans have had an sti at some point.

Its your right to refuse the pill and keep him on condoms, i also hear the pill can be pretty terrible, so whatever.. but im more concerned with that lack of trust.

I could go into your odds of you getting an sti even if he did cheat (theyre low as fuck, and a lot of them are treatable, even curable) but if your trust is that low you either picked a shit bf or you have some insecurities to work through.

>>18326642
>1 in 4 americans

Was originally typing stats and decided against it and didnt finish that thought so now i have to...

1 in 4 at some point.. Mostly on the poor demographic side so as long as you arent poor or met your bf in a ghetto youre even safer, and that stat includes if he had one in his past and has been cured, so that lowers odds even further.

Its not crazy likely.

I think OP is very realistic, much better than being idealistic. It depends a lot on your threshold level of risk, some people are okay with a low risk, others are intolerant of all but the most negligible of risks (like me). STDs can end up killing you in a pretty horrific way.

>>18325918
he will cheat unless he is beta as fuck.

If he is beta, she should run for the hills anyhow, because he will potentially cheat anyhow, only with a disgusting fat, ugly whore that is definitely harboring stds because she has no self esteem (rightly so) and is forever in a cycle of fucing strangers to make herself feel better and then hating herself for all that stranger fucking.

tl:dr
he will probably cheat

>>18326642
>>18326644

OP here, my friend thought the same as you, had unprotected sex with her boyfriend, ended up with very painful sores all over her genitals because he gave her herpes

Uncurable and very painful. Not very interested in lifelong discomfort just because "it feels better without a condom babe"

TOUGH shit. Suck it up or leave me and creampie some other girl.

if yout hink he's cheating on you, why are you still fucking him at all?

Get your partners tested. Anyone that's not a fucking idiot doesn't mind. Free clinics will do them, takes like an hour, wait included, most days.

>>18326678
Well Ill stand by the statistics and say your odds are still low, and say your friend probably picked a shit man.. but ill withdraw my thoughts that you have trust issues.

Your personal experiences make your fear understandable.

Still.. Unprotected sex feels so much better. I hope you find the trust to experience that.

But your life and your rules.

>>18325946
lmao you couldn't be more wrong.

>>18326678
>creampie some other girl
that's not a bad idea, as long as sex is not off the table

>>18325925
>My bank account

Stomp the fucking brakes OP!

As my dad told me and I tell everyone else

KEEP SEPARATE FUCKING BANK ACCOUNTS!

This isn't a matter of trust or love my parents have been married for 12 years and they keep separate bank accounts so fights about money are nonexisitant.

Keep your money safe, ease of access is the top reason for a theft.

>>18326682

unprotected sex doesn't feel as good as not having herpes/HIV/gonorrhea/etc

>>18326690
First - fucking with a condom is not a guarantee of not getting an STD. You can get them through blowjobs, or if the condom breaks.

Second - You can have both. I had unprotected sex for 6 years and I'm clean. A lot of people (apparently 3 out of 4 americans) go through life without getting a STD, and most of them had unprotected sex.

>>18326695
>A lot of people (apparently 3 out of 4 americans) go through life without getting a STD
Wrong. Like 80% of people have HPV

>>18326690
Im not disagreeing with that.

Im on your side here. Just saying those diseases are not common despite the fact you had a close friend get something.

Choice in man is a factor. Id never cheat and even if i was weak one day id use a condom. Your best friends bf was retarded.

The only reason im pushing it now is you did ask in your OP "how do you find the trust".
Pick a good man who isnt retarded, and at the very least is smart enough to wrap it up even if he does cheat and take a risk.

Its a shame to lose out on certain pleasures because of fear.

But like i said, your life your rules. Im not judging you.

>>18326702
im not OP but I agree with her
except that I would go on the pill as well anyway

>>18326698
Condoms don't even protect you from HPV, so the point still stands.
If you don't want to be infected with a STD ever, don't have sex. Otherwise, accept the risk.

>>18326706
Or you could just use condoms and minimize the risk

>>18326704
I dont know about that.

The condom is plenty effective and if you want more protection adding withdrawal on top is extremely safe (the withdrawal technique alone is highly effective if done properly. A lot of people miss the memo on how to do it right..)

Why do i say so? Because most women have side effects on the pill that are not pleasant, it messes with their hormones and emotions, and accidentally missing one is not pretty.

But thats your choice. Im just giving opinions at this point.

>>18326676
tl;dr you're just making shit up as you go along to amuse yourself that isn't even self-consistent.

>>18326713
i've been on it before, it's not that big a deal. i didn't notice really any side effects except pretty much non-existent periods which was actually great. and if you do have issues you can get prescribed something else until you figure out what works.

>>18326717
Ill take your word for it. Its better than mine.

>>18326709
Your chances of being infected are very low if you are in a monogamous relationship. Really.
I'm sorry it happened to someone you know, but for most people it is not like that.

Living your life assuming that everyone will screw you over must be awful.

>>18325913
Stop being paranoid. If you think all men will cheat on you no matter what either find better caliber men and stop going for Chads or become a lesbian.

>>18326724
using condoms is just common sense. like wearing a seatbelt when you get in a car.

don't know why you're trying to spin it like it's only for paranoid unreasonable people.

you probably have AIDs already or something so condoms are useless to you.

>>18326724
>I'm sorry it happened to someone you know, but for most people it is not like that.
The "it could never happen to me" mentality is how people get STDs in the first place, idiot.

>>18326733
Using condoms is reasonable if you are having casual sex or you are uncertain of your SO, it is unreasonable if you are in a long term, serious, committed monogamous relationship.

Assuming that
>your boyfriend is going to cheat on you
>he's going to have sex without a condom
>he's going to get an STD while doing it
>he's going to give that STD to you
>having that STD will screw you over forever
is unreasonable.

It's like wearing your seat belt while you're parking your car inside your garage. Sure, you can do it, but you're a bit excessive in my opinion.

I'm perfectly clean, had unprotected sex for a little over 6 years, get tested every year (I work in healthcare and handle syringes too much) and never had a reason to worry.

>>18326740
Fucking strangers without a condom is how people get STDs in first place.
I'm not saying that we should go out and fuck crack whores raw, but there's a line between being safe and being paranoid.
Not trusting that your SO cannot keep his dick in his pants is unreasonable.

>>18326742
Why are you assuming OP is in a "long term, serious, committed monogamous relationship"?

If you're married you have a point. But OP isn't.

>>18325913

You're doing the right thing. Never have sex without condom, guys LIE, I lie, every man is deep in individualistic ideology, and even if it isn't their intention to hurt you they CAN still hurt you anyway without wanting to and this is one of the ways they can give you problems.

Also don't let him manipulate you emotionally, you don't do it because you feel safer and more hygienic with a condom and that's it, if he cannot accept that he might as well fuck off.

>>18326745
>Fucking strangers without a condom is how people get STDs in first place.
People have gotten STDs from their SOs and spouses before.

Lmao fucking leave the healthcare profession if you're out here advocating against condom use. Jesus christ what a retard.

>>18326758
Yes, and people have gotten STDs from condom breaking or giving blowjobs.

Of course it is possible to get a STD from your SO, but it is not LIKELY to happen and it's stupid to live your life being terrified of things that aren't likely to happen.

>>18326745
Listen to this guy, OP.

Then at least when you have herpes you can say "at least I wasn't paranoid"

>>18326766
Condoms don't really protect you from herpes.

>>18326770
Yes yes, I know, condoms are silly and pointless. Only hysterical fearmongers use them.

>>18326771
I never argued that condoms are silly or pointless.
Condoms are great. They lower the risk of spreading STDs and lower the risk of pregnancies.
But they don't eliminate the risk of neither. They often break. They don't really protect you against some STDs.
If you don't want to risk getting an STD, don't fuck. There's no other way. There is no 100% safe sex.

All I am saying is that if you are in a long term relationship with someone, it shouldn't be a huge deal to have sex without a condom because you trust them to not cheat on you.

>>18326782
If your condoms are breaking, you're doing it wrong, bud.

>>18326785
Not that guy but i've had them break. Perfectly wet vagina, no tuggin, fit fine and it broke. It's literally impossible for condoms to be completely free of imperfections.

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>>18325913
I had one gf who I dated for 2 and half years.
We never had sex with condoms.
I always creampie her, and looking back how much sex we had, I'm stunned for didn't had a kid with her.
She trusted me as I truster her.
She could fuck me up not taking pills, as I could fuck her up (teehehe) in cheat her.
But it never happened.

My advice for you: stop being paranoid. I have a friend who just now, after 10+ years stop doing the "all man lie" bullshit.
Also, if you can't trust him, why do you have a bf? Get a dildo.

>>18326823
asking white people's opinion only

>>18326823
This.

Look at it this way: you can fuck him up by not taking the pill, and he can fuck you up by cheating.

It's like mutually assured destruction but hotter.

>>18325913
But if he cheats on you he will use a condom so he won't be getting STDs. Do you think he's retarded?

>>18326678

Holy fuck. Poor girl. That's so sad. He doesn't even sound like it was worth it

>>18326724
>Living your life assuming that everyone will screw you over must be awful.
It is.

>>18326979
Actually he is worth it.

>>18326752

This is probably still the safest thing to do. You notice how guys REFUSE to get their shit checked? Being safe, not pregnant, no diseases somehow that's not as important to them as it is to us. Fucking wrap that shit up!

>>18326993

He was worth the herps? But didn't he cheat on his gf and that's how he gave it to her?

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>>18326826
>last white people opinion
ayy

>>18326752
>>18326996
You guys have known some pretty shitty people. Anons here talk tough on the internet but in reality when it comes to this matter I doubt any guy would want to harm their girl that way.

>>18327015
>Anons here talk tough on the internet but in reality when it comes to this matter I doubt any guy would want to harm their girl that way.

This is a comforting thought. I wish I could believe it but it's hard to believe.

>>18327008
>3rd worlder's breeding habits

really don't need to attach any image.

>>18327024
>white "people"
>in charge about breeding habits
Mate, you fucks don't breed, this is why your woman just fuck black guys and latins.
Cucked to oblivion.

>>18327008
>>18327024
>>18327030

Gents, let's try to stay on point plz. Your little piss match looks super insecure even if it's anonymous. K? Thanks

>>18327021
Are you talking about a guy in a relationship with you or just some guy acquaintance you fuck at weekend?
if a guy is in a relationship with you he should care about your health, too. You guys are in the same team and you should know enough about him to trust he's not getting an STD elsewhere.
Maybe you got in a relationship with a man you don't know well, in that case good luck lol

>>18326823
>Once I went driving without coolant and shit didn't explode and kill me though I can't believe it didn't now that I think about it. You should totally do it man, it's totally cool.

>>18325913
I trusted my fiance, I got herpes and I got pregnant. He swears he never cheated on me and that he's gotten tested. Never trust dudes. Ever. Sex completely dominates their brains.

inb4 why didn't I use the pill...a condom is an extremely thin layer covering your penis. Birth control changes your fucking HORMONES causing all sorts of effects on your body, some irreversible, some with a potentially life-threatening risk. The serious stuff aside, it's not even worth it to me to break out or gain weight.

Yes I had the baby and yes I'm still married.

>>18327106
he was EXTREMELY promiscuous. To a revolting degree. I didn't really find this all out until it was too late. And it doesn't matter, condoms aren't 100% effective blah blah blah but it could've saved me. It's all irrelevant. Just wear a fucking condom

FEMANONS JUST MAKE HIM WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM. NO WHINY EXCUSES OR EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION

>>18327101

>He swears he never cheated on me and that he's gotten tested.
Hmm this could be true. Sometimes stds lay dormant until it;s ready to surface. So he could have had herpes the whole time?

>>18327113

ugh that sucks, anon.
>Birth control changes your fucking HORMONES causing all sorts of effects on your body, some irreversible, some with a potentially life-threatening risk.

This is so true. I'd rather not develop breast cancer

>>18327113
Your mistake was not using a safe birth control method and dating a scumbag.
Did you even get tested before starting to have sex raw?

Using some brain could have saved you.

>>18327126

Not her, but I was a virgin when I slept with my bf and I had no clue I was doing. I just let him do what he wanted. No protection.

>Using some brain could have saved you.
Yes, it's true. girls need to know about this stuff.

Not all guys are like that, fucking dumb whores. Find a good guy who actually loves you and stop going out with only jerks.

>>18327101
They don't test for herpes in a regular STD screening, you have to specifically ask for it separately.