>tl;dr: girl hurt my feelings and now I'm only attracted

Bump anyone?

>>18321752
>I'm 27 btw.
Better wife this one up OP, you're getting too old for virgin territory unless you're gushing money

>>18321779
I'm really attractive. I have always had girls like me since elementary school until now. Just 2 days I went to a carnival and had a bunch of high school girls follow me around and giggled and try to get me to talk to them by walking real close to me. Any job I work more than a few girls end up liking me and developing crushes.

I guess follow up question is whats the oldest age is it okay to date/marry an 18-20 year old girl without it being seen as weird? I feel like i'm right on the edge of being too old to date girls that age but they're the ones who are more likely to be virgins.

As long as you're able to admit that your thing for virgin girls stems from the insecurity that girl brought out in you.

You're unwilling to "compete" with other guys so virgins are your only option

Well for one thing, you thin out your dating pool enormously. I don't know if you're a great enough guy that you can afford to single only virgins out, all the more if you also want her to be cute, sweet, smart, stable etc. It's just really unpractical. The older you get, the more extreme the age gap it also (pretty much inevitably) forces you to go for. Dating an eighteen year old because at least she's a virgin is still one thing at twenty five (still frowned upon), but different at thirty. You will also wind up with girls who have little relationship experience. This isn't -just- a bad thing (people can get hang ups as well from close interaction, as you experienced yourself) but most people learn lots from especially the initial relationship, mainly about themselves (what they need, what their flaws are, how to fight toxic behavior/urges they get). So it's not just a great thing, either.

As for whether it's wrong that you have this preference... It does not seem endlessly healthy to me, no, especially given the context. Can you put into words what the issue is if a girl has had sex? If you are afraid that a girl would not be happy with you if she knows there's big dicks out there, you underestimate porn and fantasy as competition. Just because a girl is a virgin doesn't mean she's not sexual or does not have raunchy sexual fantasies.

Mostly though, I wonder if this thing impacted you THIS much, whether the issue is truly done as long as you date a virgin. Or whether the same insecurity/obsession will return in a different form. How would you feel about a virginal girlfriend who wants to share or own a dildo, for example?

>>18321804
>from the insecurity
I don't think its insecurity in fact it's the opposite it's security for me as I feel virgins are the ones who can be trusted more.

>You're unwilling to "compete" with other guys so virgins are your only option
No i just want a girl who is innocent and doesn't care about sex that much. A girl who lost her virginity at 15 shows bad judgment in my opinion. And by the time she's in 20 the same girl will only go down the dirtier sex route.

Why do you think that girl talking about loving big cock bothered you so much?

Why do you think that interaction specifically made you only want to date virgins?

>>18321811
What's the big problem with her liking sex? And do you also not like sex that much? Because if you do, that's a glaring mismatch.

Also for the record this is a really simplistic way to look at it. I'm sure that if you analyze thousands of women, those to lose their virginity later in life are more likely to be sexually conservative. But you are only dating a single individual. Whether or not you have sex young doesn't just have to do with how much you like sex, but also with how attractive you are, how many other people you meet, how conservative your culture is, how closed off or open you are emotionally..

>>18321811
>a girl who is innocent and doesn't care about sex that much
What happens when she doesn't care about sex with you that much?

>>18321805
I already found a qt 19 year old virgin girl who I like and we're talking now. I don't think she's attractive enough to marry, she's a 7/10. I figure I will date her for a couple years and If we fall in love I will consider marriage. The older I get the creepier dating younger virgins get.

>Can you put into words what the issue is if a girl has had sex?

I get a weird feeling thinking about her having sex especially if its sub dom sex or if she does something like give a blowjob that seems really crude to me now.

> If you are afraid that a girl would not be happy with you if she knows there's big dicks out there,
I have a big dick, girls have told me I'm the biggest theyve been with but the guy she sucked apparently had a bigger dick than me. It wasn't the size it was just her sucking it in the context of me liking her. Now i'd rather have a virgin than that.

>impacted you THIS much, whether the issue is truly done as long as you date a virgin.
Yes a virgin girl would make me feel secure. At least for a couple years.

> virginal girlfriend who wants to share or own a dildo, for example?
Wouldn't care it's a dildo not an other man.

>>18321838
Well, the very fact that you are considering to date someone you actually don't like all that much because virgin girls who are of age are that rare (true), does not make me feel like this is doing you favors. But it's your life and if you feel no desire to revisit your own hang ups (which it kind of sounds like, that you are mostly worrying about others' judgment) I would just accept that online strangers might think it's a demeaning preference. Not like anyone in real life will realize you date her for this reason, at most they might think for her age.

>>18321820
>Why do you think that girl talking about loving big cock bothered you so much?

Tf kind of question is that? Because i'm not a cuck obviously. I wanted to be with her until she started with all the other guys cocks when we weren't talking.

>Why do you think that interaction specifically made you only want to date virgins?

Virgins don't suck other guys cocks obviously.

>>18321826
What's the big problem with her liking sex?
It was done in a context that hurt my feelings.

>And do you also not like sex that much?
How does this matter, relationships aren't all about sex your mind keeps on going back to sex sex sex. Grow up.

>Whether or not you have sex young doesn't just have to do...

I want the girl in that cuture or situation that you described that doesn't have sex not the ones that do. They exist everywhere. The mind of a person who doesn't fall for the being a sex object is attractive to me.

>>18321828
>What happens when she doesn't care about sex with you that much?
I wouldn't care because I don't see people as sex objects and dont see them as a means to an end. I could get laid everyday if the week if I wanted with new girls often but I don't care about that because i'm not a sex obsessed desperate low thinking loser like you.


Sorry i'm being rude but I feel like you people are attacking me.

>>18321861
>It was done in a context that hurt my feelings.
Yeah the instance you describe, sure. But you spoke in the present tense of not wanting a girl who attaches much importance to sex.

>How does this matter
Because simultaneously looking for a girl who does not like/value sex much, and looking for a girl to have an intense and thriving sex life with is undoable.

>Grow up.
Do you realize that you attach so much value to sex that you would not want to date the most beautiful, sweet and loving woman in the world because of the memory that she once had it with someone? You're not really in a position to say other people make it into too big a deal.

>for being a sex object
Why is she being a sex object if she has sex with someone else, but not if she has sex with you?

>>18321860
I do like her. She's smart, kind, not ugly (7/10) and she's into me and seems loyal responsive to me and what I view and she is a virgin who has never had a bf. This is really attractive to me. It's just i'm used to only being attracted to the prettiest girls like a 9/10 or 10/10. A few years ago I would have looked over her as just your average above average girl unless I got to know her personality which takes too much time for me to do for every girl.

>>18321752
I'm with you op, screw those cucks.

>>18321861
>Tf kind of question is that? Because i'm not a cuck obviously.

You do realize that dating a girl who has had sex before does not make you a cuckold, right?

If you had any self esteem it wouldn't bother you to know your partner isn't a virgin.

However, you're a narcissist, so you feel threatened by the THOUGHT of the girl you're dating having been with someone else.

Honestly you should just stay alone forever because I guarantee you will never find a girl who wants to be your virginal asexual little prize for your entire pathetic life. Grow the fuck up loser

>>18321861
Sex is still important in a relationship. Being able to get laid every day of the week isn't going to benefit you when you're stuck in a relationship with someone who doesn't want to have sex with you. Unless you mean you plan to cheat? Most people like when their partner is into them. It makes them feel good and secure. If you look specifically for someone not that interested in sex, you'd be lacking that.

So black and white with you. People are either virgins or "sex obsessed desperate low thinking losers" nothing in between.

>>18321868
Maybe I just have different standards for liking someone (let alone enough to marry them!) if I feel like saying she's actually not attractive enough for you for that, and that you might marry her a few years down the line if she grows on you, and that this consideration is also spurred by knowing that you don't have endless options with this dealbreaker.

I didn't mean to say you sound like you don't like her at all, just that it sounds like you would never consider to get married to her if you didn't have this thing with virginity. And it's up to you whether you are fine with that and accept that your priorities shifted and you changed. If you're not fine with that upon second thought, you'll have to question yourself more than just accepting your hang ups as a given to work around.

>>18321867
>But you spoke in the present tense of not wanting a girl who attaches much importance to sex.
Yes and this is why I want a virgin.

>and looking for a girl to have an intense and thriving sex life with is undoable.
Who said I wanted or cared about that? I would be happy if she was a nymphomaniac or asexual or anywhere inbetween.

>
Do you realize that you attach so much value to sex that you would not want to date the most beautiful, sweet and loving woman in the world because of the memory that she once had it with someone?

Sounds accurate. I don't see whats wrong with this. I knew she wasn't a virgin before I met her and I didn't care then. After being hurt I care now. It's the dirty aspect of sex I don't like the submissive nature of doing something for some guy that feels like ownership and degrading her value. I don't care that she had sex and gave him a blow job desu. It was that she was the sex object to another man and didn't care how that made me feel. With a virgin that wouldn't happen.

>Why is she being a sex object if she has sex with someone else, but not if she has sex with you?
Because I wouldn't have treated her like a sex object obviously. I value other parts of the relationship than just sex. And she did too for a while at least. But then she stopped so now down the road I'm attracted to virgins.

>>18321892
>Who said I wanted or cared about that?
No one, I just asked to make sure whether this might present an issue or not.

>I don't see whats wrong with this.
That it's ironic and hypocritical to accuse others of valuing sex too much in a relationship, whereas you value it so much that you are willing to let sex rule out 95% of your dating options. I doubt anyone else ITT has such extreme sexual dealbreakers.

Also for the record, it sounds more fucked up to me that she was rubbing it in your face. That means at best she was a trashy attentionwhore and at worst sadistic. But it doesn't have much to do with her being a sexual being in general, or not being a virgin.

>Because I wouldn't have treated her like a sex object obviously.
I was not talking about your ex-crush specifically but about referring to girls who lost their virginity as allowing themselves to be used as a sex object. Which according to this argument (she's a sex object because the sex had a degrading element to you) you can't know because for all you know they could've had tender lovemaking.

>>18321880
>You do realize that dating a girl who has had sex before does not make you a cuckold, right?
It depends on the girl. Some girls are so sleazy and have been with so many guys that its a cuck material.

>If you had any self esteem it wouldn't bother you to know your partner isn't a virgin.
What does self esteem have to do with trusting another person? Virgins are more trustable and make me feel secure.

>However, you're a narcissist, so you feel threatened by the THOUGHT of the girl you're dating having been with someone else.
No I just want a girl who isn't sleazy. A girl with a low count is still okay as long as shes a good girl. But virgin girls are the best guarantee to me.

>I guarantee you will never find a girl who wants to be your virginal asexual little prize for your entire pathetic life. Grow the fuck up loser
Idc if shes asexual or not.

>>18321887
Sex sex sex sex. That's all I hear you talk about. Sorry I value other things in a relationship and want someone who does that too before the sex aspect?? Is that okay with you?? I don't care if they want a lot of sex or a little sex when we're together, the other things are more important. Grow up.

>If you look specifically for someone not that interested in sex, you'd be lacking that.
Or we would find other things fulfilling you peabrain.

>>18321890
Your whole post makes it sound like she gets nothing out of it.

>>18321920
>Your whole post makes it sound like she gets nothing out of it.
Not necessarily. But I know I would not want to get married to someone who talked about me in this pragmatic and dispassionate manner. Would you? If she was telling her girlfriend "yeah this guy he's okay you know, a few years ago I would've looked right through him but yeah... he's a secure option and he does have great qualities!"

>>18321920
>Sex sex sex sex. That's all I hear you talk about.
Because that's all you focus on, because that word is triggering for you.

You don't want a virgin anon, you want someone who isn't obsessed with sex. These two criteria are not the same thing. Stop being so attached to meaningless labels.

>>18321904
>That it's ironic and hypocritical to accuse others of valuing sex too much in a relationship,

No it's the opposite. Valuing sex = wanting more of it. Not valuing sex = not caring about it that much. I don't value sex that highly in relationnship. While the same 95% you speak of most likely value it highly. I want the 5% that doesn't who is a virgin still because I am like them.

>so much that you are willing to let sex rule out 95% of your dating options. I doubt anyone else ITT has such extreme sexual dealbreakers

Girls all the time 6 foot + and above only for dating guys while thats only 10% or so of the population. Same thing with girls who say they only date guys with huge dicks. Huge dicks 8 inches + are 1% of the population.

>But it doesn't have much to do with her being a sexual being in general, or not being a virgin.
You want me to believe there's a lot of girls who have a bunch of sex and are good kind people who I should not judge. I don't beleive that, once a girl pushes into high sex partner counts I lose respect for them. If they're older the count can be higher but still.

>you can't know because for all you know they could've had tender lovemaking
Going back to the 95%, how many of them do you think like degrading and sub dom sex? I think it's the majority of that number. So many of them are into being submissive to a guy and that's a huge turn off to me. With a virgin i can teach her to be the kind of person I want to be in a sense. I can avoid her from falling into meme sex and to be happy with normal healthy sex.

>>18321930
>Not necessarily. But I know I would not want to get married to someone who talked about me in this pragmatic and dispassionate manner. Would you?

She would know nothing of my thoughts and why I like virgins and so on. I would keep all of it a secret and not plague her with down thoughts just happiness and kindness and peace of mind and care. Like I deserved.

>he's a secure option and he does have great qualities!"

Security is attractive though. I feel secure in that she won't sleep around. Her being a virgin at this age says a lot about her too and I like what it says. Her looks are above average I have nothing wrong with how she looks. I shouldnt have mentioned looks, she's not my dream girl at first sight is all I meant to say but everything else about her i'm attracted to.

>>18321931
No I focus on lack of sex, virginity is the word i focus on not sex.

>>18321955
No now even is I found a girl who wasnt obsessed with sex I don't think I would like her that much anymore. Maybe I would. But the appeal of a virgin is so much better than someone who isn't obsessed with sex. I'm not obsessed with sex because I don't care about it. I don't care if the person i'm with turns out to be a nympho if she's a virgin.

>>18321752
>I don't want girls who give blowjobs

What the fuck is wrong with you?

>>18321991
Roastie detected

>>18322096
Shouldn't you be on /r9k/, retarded virgin?

Guys want blowjobs. A girl who doesn't give her guy blowjobs is worthless.

>>18321795
It's already kinda weird, so just ignore society and marry someone you're happy with. As for your question in the OP, you can't change what you're attracted to. It'd be retarded to force yourself to be with someone you don't find attractive cause ppl look at you wrong. Best advice I can give is stop giving a shit about what people think

>>18321795
At age 18, ANY marriage is gonna be seen as weird.
At 20, something like 23 is the cutoff for it being wierd.
25 can be excusable if there is some kind of cultural excuse like the two people are Indian or really religious or something.

27 is already too old. It's gonna be seen as wierd anyways so who cares you might as well be 30

>>18322113
DUURRRRR IM A ROASTIE COCK GOES HERE DUUURRR I CAN FIT THE WHOLE THING IN MY MOUTH! DUUURRRRR

>>18322184
What part of "stay on your containment board, bitter /r9k/ virgin" don't you understand?

>>18322113
>all guys are the same
Pls stop this meme. OP has preferences that you aren't used to, no need to be mad about it