I don't think cheating is wrong. Of course fucking somebody

>>18314661
Anon, you don't think cheating is okay. What you've described as cheating isn't.

>>18314661

When asking myself whether something is morally right or not, I think about the following:

Would I be honestly be okay with my partner doing the exact same thing?

If the answer is no, or if I ever have to think about it, the chances are it isn't acceptable. Keep in mind that your brain will try and convince you that you're okay with it, especially if it's an immediate option.

>>18314730
>Keep in mind that your brain will try and convince you that you're okay with it, especially if it's an immediate option.

If you don't care about the person.

What if they were cheated on by someone else in the past and are still traumatized? Would you want to be the second person to contribute to their suffering? Isn't the relationship in question just a means to an end if not?

>>18314730
I think it's fine for a woman to sit on her fat ass and do 30 minutes of housework each day and feel like she's contributing as much as her husband is, but the opposite certainly isn't true.

My feeling has always been that it's one thing to dream or fantasize but another to act on it. I think the former is ok but once you act on it you've crossed the line and that's cheating.

>>18314661
> fucking somebody and getting into a physical relationship is fucked up
>I don't think cheating is wrong
You literally just described the half of the basis of infidelity, i.e. cheating

>talking sexually and lusting after other people
> If you never let it go further, is it okay?
And that right there is the other half, emotional infidelity.

If fucking someone without emotions is wrong, why is emotionally traipsing about without physical contact okay?
Is it because sex is physical, and thus leaves evidence, but just talking "lol you can't prove anything"?

Seeing someone and thinking "damn, that's a fine ass" is fine. People can't really help what pops into their heads.
But if you walk over there and starting chatting them up, flirting with them, and getting an emotional validation off of their interaction which should be coming from your significant other, yes, that is bad.

You're never going to stop finding other people attractive. People can't just shut off like that.

And as for cheating, it's going to depend on the person and the relationship. A good rule of thumb is that it's okay if it's something you both honestly agree is okay.

For example, in my relationship, my partner and I are okay with flirting with other people. Not extensive flirting, not nudes, nothing like that. But being playful and occasionally suggestive is fine. We both allow this because we love each other and trust each other and know the other person wouldn't take it too far or actually cheat and/or leave.

But for some people, this would be crossing the line. Maybe looking at someone attractive is okay but flirting isn't. And then there's the people who have open relationships, which can be a MASSIVE minefield but can also work if everybody knows and is not only okay but happy with it.

And then there's the people who are upset if their partner interacts with or even looks at someone they could possibly find attractive. This is jealousy taken too far and a problem. Especially if the person then starts to control their partner and limit who they have contact with. Anyone who does this is being controlling, aka an asshole and potentially abusive.

>>18315236
>This is jealousy taken too far and a problem.

It's a problem but it's also normal in first relationships, between young people or people who have been betrayed in the past. It's something to work up to, at whatever pace is most comfortable for both people. It's not right to expect someone to bite off more than they can chew emotionally so you can get extra validation from third parties without dealing with any guilt or consequences.

>>18315244
True, as long as they legitimately recognize that there's a problem and actively work towards fixing it.

>>18315248
Of course, it's batshit to believe in the wishful thinking virgin waifu memes and act like obsessive stalker-tier jealousy is ever justifiable.

I disagree. Obviously at the end of the day, you set the boundaries within the relationship, between the two of you. If your girlfriend doesn't think it's a big deal, it effectively isn't for you. Some couples are both happy with not being allowed opposite sex friendships. Some couples feel anything up until sex isn't quite cheating yet.

However I would not be down with this stuff. It's not one-sided like porn or ogling, you are sexually interacting with someone else. Explicitly sexual (compared to flirting), too.

Besides, there's still varying degrees. Roleplaying scenarios your partner has no interest in with strangers on omegle text (if that's still a thing) you can't see and will never talk to again, is a far cry from exchanging nudes and steamy fantasies with your partner's best friend.

That's a conversation you need to have with your partner. If your partner isn't ok wig it you need to end the relationship or work out an understanding. If you're going to do that then your partner should have the freedom to as well. If you don't have the conversation and you are doing it it is cheating. You will hurt your partner and feel shitty the whole time and prob a lot of regret. If you care at all you will have the conversation.

>>18315254
no but in such a case its important to help the person who has such problems and try to understand.

>>18315273
Right, this is a given if we're talking about people who want an actual relationship and don't just want to be in one as a way to measure their worth as a person.

>>18315280
if that where the case you shouldn't enter the relationship in the first place, anon

>>18315286
Obviously but there are still going to be plenty of people who stay in relationships despite knowing they're not in it for the right reasons. Because if they think it's ok to use people, it must be true.