So you've lost the love of your life. The person you thought

>>18280489
I'm not even a real person

>>18280489
>>18280489
We have all been there my friend. next time you are in a busy bus take a look. they have all had their hearts broken at some point, whether in their youth or recently.

its the way of things.

I say count your blessings. I mean you wasn't with her for 12+ years with a mortgage and two kids and then got kicked to the kurb and still be forced to slave for that mortgage and on top, child maintenance right?

Use this as a learning experience to place yourself in a situation to get it just that much right next time the gods present you with an opportunity.

and the gods will present you with another opportunity so keep your head up and keep your eyes out like eye captain.


Goodspee anon, we are all gonna make it.

>>18280489
I'm not sure of your exact scenario or how things ended with this person you thought to be "the one," but I'll share with you my story in hopes it may help.

I was with a girl whom I thought for sure I would have a future with. I moved to a new city 1000 miles away to be with her and she ended things just 3 months after I uprooted my life for her. When we split up she showed her true colors and behaved in ways that legitimately made me sick to my stomach. It made me realize that though I thought I had found someone who I could share my life with, I was clearly mistaken and had really fallen for an idealized version of this person who never truly existed.

What I'm getting at is that people often turn out not to be as great as you think they are when you're convinced that you're in love with them. Again, I don't know your situation exactly, but chances are if this person was "the one" then things wouldn't have ended, she would have stayed by your side and accepted whatever flaws you have. If you two really do have potential for a future then, despite how you feel now, you'll find your way back to each other when the time is right. In the meantime, don't focus so much on your relationship with other people, focus on yourself, work on becoming the best version of you. Do it to better your chances of getting her back if that's what will motivate you.

>>18280489

>Did 'the one' really turn out to be irreplaceable?

Don't be silly. There is no "the one". There are 7 billion people on this planet. Figure it out.

No. It really felt like that back then, she was my first love, I've her since we were kids and I genuinely felt I was ready to give all of my life to her. But eventually life happened, things went wrong in every possible way and I was forced to leave her. It took me a year to fully get over it and feel good again, mostly because she was my whole social life. But time went on and the girl I currently have feelings for is so much more amazing in every way, in ways that I could have never even imagined. I didn't even know to wish for all this.

I'm sure it feels like she's the most amazing person ever, but that's just you who feels like that. The you of right now, who hasn't met all the people that the future you will have met. In reality she is just like many other girls. Of course it's possible you'll never meet anyone better, but they absolutely are out there.

>>18280489
I'm not sure yet. I'm with someone I'm "settling" for, and I've recently been forced to stop talking to the girl I really love.

The other girl is OK, but she doesn't really respect my privacy and she has tried to gaslight me about it several times. IDK how I feel about that right now. If I left her I'd still just find someone else to settle for, probably.

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Thank you for the answers, anons.

>>18280520
Fuck, dude.

I moved 200 miles away to be with her, and we ended things after just 3 months.

She showed her true colors also, in the sense that we cried in each others arms, so afraid of losing one another. The last time I saw her, she left our apartment, bawling her eyes out and saying 'I'll always love you. You'll always be my boo". This moment has fucking torn my heart to shreds. It scarred my very soul. We both agreed that we were meant to be, but just not right now. If the time is right, then perhaps we'll find each other again. It sounds so beautiful, but it's been nothing but torturous.

She had fallen for another guy. They had kissed, but she confessed and she choose to work on our relationship if I wanted to (I had my faults too, every story has two sides). Yet, the more we talked, the more I realized I had already lost her. She had feelings for two and had a hard time reconciling it. So I made the choice to end it. I thought I deserved better, but not a day goes by where I don't second guess this decision. I should've tried harder. I should've given it more time... etc...

We ended a relationship with so much love for each other. A love that was never allowed to die.

That's why I'm so afraid that she's become irreplaceable.

>When we split up she showed her true colors and behaved in ways that legitimately made me sick to my stomach.

Consider it a blessing.

>>18280489
It's been three years since she divorced me. Everything I've tried since then has made me realize how empty my life is.

>>18280489

gave up on that idea after highschool desu.

i moved a LOT, went to 5 highschools, so had a lot of fast romances, and a lot of dramatic endings. I quickly realized that there is no 'the one' that you're going to meet a lot of people you feel passionate about, but less so as you get older.

the older you get, the more people you experience, the more special they actually have to be to make you feel that way. which is good, cuz when you feel that feeling when you're older, you know they really are special, even if they can't be 'the one'.

>>18280489
>Did 'the one' really turn out to be irreplaceable?

Yes, and no.

You'll never have another relationship exactly like the one you've already had, because people and relationships are unique. In that sense you can't replace that person.

But that doesn't mean you can't find some one else or a stronger, better relationship.

>>18280574
Honestly it sounds like you just need some closure man. That is one thing I'm thankful for with my ex, she showed her true colors in that she behaved like a pathetic spoiled brat, which made it very easy for me to understand that her and I will never have a future together.

What ifs are never good to dwell on, and the only way to get rid of them is to find some closure, whether that means you convince yourself that you're better off without her (which it sounds like you are, idk about you but loyalty is something I value), or that you speak to her again one last time to come to terms with the situation.

All in all, I'd suggest you get yourself in the mindset that you two aren't going to work out, now or in the future. That way if you do wind up back together someday, it will be more of a pleasant surprise than something you've been waiting impatiently for.

I was a skeptic too. I thought I had found 'the one.' love, living together, marriage, nine years I was all in. They left me for someone younger. I was devastated, had a psychotic break, a mid-life rebellion phase, the whole bit. My life became pathetic, my dreams consisted of suicide and delusions. So I lost 35lbs, began exercising, took more chances

One day, in what I planned as an act of a one night stand to calm my needs, I met an amazing man I have fallen in love with. It isn't the same type of love in that each relationship and person is different, but it is good and comforting and fun.

My advice is to focus on self improvement and say yes more often than no. Try new things, take risks, meet people. You may discover a new side of yourself that you didn't know you had.

>>18280489
i had to break up with my boyfriend of three years because he developed paranoid schizophrenia and got heavy into drug use. he also cheated on me in that time and manipulated me so there was nothing i could do to change things. i left him because i couldn't take it but i still feel so bad because i wanted to marry him. i don't think i'll meet another person ever again that was like him before he went bat shit. i tried to talk to him recently an he's like a completely different person. i've been basically mourning the death of his former self for almost a year now. the only thing that really helps is time. i've tried to "get back out there" but i still feel so dead inside. as time goes on things are getting slightly better though

There was never "the one" for me.
There was nothing to lose.

>>18280847
I've been trying to do so, non-stop. To a degree, this thread is a reflection of that.

It's all so fucking hard...

I'm not going to make it.

>>18280521
I'm so triggered by this response any time anyone here uses the term "the one". No one believes that there is literally only ONE single person in the world out there for them. They obviously mean the ONE person they are eventually going to marry, spend life, create a family with.

Unless they are some kind of radical Mormon/Muslim bigamist.

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The first lady I saw after my 3 yr ex had the same name and a very similar personality. It was completely unintentional, she just happened to be the first person to respond to me on tinder. She stopped talking to me for the same reason. I'd tell you to not make my mistakes OP, but it gave me some perspective on the whole thing. I love you OP, don't do anything dumb

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>>18280489
>tfw never even had a "her"

You don't know how lucky you are

>>18282330
Be careful what you wish for.

You can recover from a broken heart, but you'll never be whole again.

>>18281818
Trust me man, I know it's hard, but that's part of life. If it was easy then you'd gain nothing from it. Be grateful for the experiences you've had and learn from the mistakes you made. Time heals all wounds and someday you'll look back on all this and be thankful for the whole situation. You're gonna make it, we're all gonna make it.

>>18280489
Turns out she was an asshole who just used me to pass our studies.

Yeah, breakups really leaves a scar especially when you get too emotionally attached to her. Feels like a good sized chunk of you was missing and makes your life off-balanced for days, weeks, months...

>>18280489
>started to eat
Lucky, stopping was my problem kek.

The one after her was tighter, more youhtful, more fun to be around, better looking and complimented my dick a lot.

Still miss 'the one' but every day I spend missing her a lot I miss and love her less the next time. Just dont check social media and cut her off from ur mind completely.

>>18282330
I used to be like this.

Trust me when I say not having anyone in your life is more bearable than having someone you like but not able to be with them.

>>18281842
>mormon
>muslim

>bigamist
You realize both of those actively encourage and practice polygamy? Additionaly youre supposed to get 72 virgins in one of those relgions havean.

Youre an idiot. Just saying.

>>18280489
Shut it watch noblesenpai(lost pause) or some good anime

>>18283120
This

you're the lucky one