Pic related. Me. > 24, likes to stay active, pursuing a career

>>18264299
Oh yea, green text isn't me showing off. I'm just saying on paper I'm really just a normal average guy

>>18264299
Game playing is sadly fairly normal.

What people look for or find attractive in partners is not a logical thing at all, hence that somewhat old dating adage "attraction is not a choice". Though it sounds weird to say, many people look for partners who remind them of their parents and how their parents made them feel emotionally. So if a girl grew up with a distant father, she wants a boyfriend or husband who is similarly aloof and uncaring because that's what is familiar to her. And when you tell them you like them and would like to get to know them better, this turns them off. They don't know why, so they chalk it up to just not feeling attracted or you being "too nice" as if that's somehow possible. This has been my experience anyways, I meet chicks who are interested, get to know me, then run into the arms of another asshole who's more likely to abandon them.

Before anyone shits on me for being a woman hater: I'm not. I realize guys have daddy issues too, but this is a guy asking for help with women, so the proper gender pronouns are used here.

>>18264299
If a chick likes you she'll get with you.

If you fuck well and click she'll ask about making it exclusive.

Stop turning down sex to "get to know" chicks. If you fuck well the chick will want to keep seeing you.

>>18264383
As far as a solution goes, the problem really doesn't have much to do with you. Plenty of guys struggle with dating for the same reasons you do. They might bang a lot but not many people have their emotional shit handled to a point that they can have a successful relationship, and most people just go with what "feels right", i.e. that emotional pattern that reminds them of their parents. They don't question it, and they get upset if you recommend they try therapy to help them open up to truly nice, caring men or women, or that their choice in men or women is simply not healthy for them at all.

This is where the "numbers game" comes into play, you have your shit handled and are on good footing. You're not perfect but you're far from terrible and arguably a good catch. What you do is what everyone else does, keep meeting new people - potentially in the hundreds or thousands - and eventually you will meet someone. Some people get very lucky, many others have to wait a while.

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>>18264383
Haha perhaps a good first date question would be "what's your relationship with your dad like?" and manipulate the hell out of the situation from there.
I won't lie, meeting new girls is fun. Even better when you get to that first moment of touching and kissing. It's a high for me. Unfortunately, the high comes down should they ever start playing games.

You have no idea how many girls have told me that they wanted me in their lives and go the other way.

>>18264387
It almost sounds like you're telling me I should do what every other guy is doing and be a fuccboi

>>18264407
People fuck then establish exclusivity these days. No chick wants to make a babby dick her boyfriend who can't even get her off.

>>18264407
Who the fuck texts shit like this.

The second a chick disrespects me I walk away.

>>18264419
Honestly my buddy put the words in my mouth on those last two messages.

I was just gonna let the chick walk and hit me up when she had time

>>18264407
See, it's even in her text. She's not emotionally available. Fuck man, that's not a game at all, she's at least being honest with you because she sees your high value.

>>18264423
I think you over think things and try to define them too much. This defining the relationship stuff you are sending over texts should be done after sex in thr middle of the night.

>>18264428
Haha I suppose you could look at it that way. I'm letting her walk, I'm sure she'll come back around eventually.
I've seen her phone, she's not fucking around with other guys. She got into a car accident and there's a slew of other shit going on in her life

>>18264438
Why do you feel in need of a woman so much?

>>18264433
Idk if it's my 4chan autism but it's just easier for me to call things for what they are

>>18264441
FOMO. I've always had the option for sex, I've always been curious what it's like to have a girl stick around

>>18264442
You refer to "4chan autism" as an excuse for lacking any degree of social grace, then you have the nerve to wonder why people don't like you.

>>18264442
That would weird me out if I were her. Pushing to define shit too soon and then making ultimatums is usually a sign of abusive relationships.

>>18264457
You're right. I could do a lot better with social grace. I think that's one of my bigger character flaws

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>>18264459
Personally it was my instinct NOT to give this ultimatum. My buddy, who does have an interesting history, told me to say those exact words.

>>18264466
Why don't you try just being yourself and being open? That shit looks majorly unhealthy.

>>18264299
>>18264407
>>18264466
Wow, even though you are Asian, you are a real normie. I wonder how you don't have a normie girlfriend yet, this is weird.

>>18264472
Lol OK thanks for the sarcasm man. I've learned the hard way to just trust myself from now on

>>18264469
Y'know I called my friend on his bullshit this morning and his justification was, "it always worked for me"
So I've learned two things: trust yourself, and consider the source of your advice

>>18264477
A lot of busted chicks get into emotionally abusive relationships. It's way better if the girl likes you for you. That's what you actually want, not to manipulate a chick into not wanting to leave you.

>>18264482
I'm still learning to accept myself. I've lost a lot of good girls because I'm still not certain that character aspects I'm missing or need. I'm still learning it all I guess

>>18264494
Stop thinking that you're playing an rpg. Life doesn't start tomorrow or next year. It's happening right now. You aren't going to level up.

>>18264501
What? You don't think about improving yourself and your circumstances everyday?

>>18264501
>Doesn't understand that RPGs take all of their aspects from real life and level is age

>>18264611
There is a difference between improving yourself and using what you have now.

The fact that you don't seem too confident with who you are right now may be one of the things that is putting women off you

>>18264639
I'm not. If I'm brutally honest with myself the best thing I can do for myself is keep working on my life and things will sort itself out

>>18264299
You're asking what you're doing wrong as if it's a game and there are right choices and wrong choices. If you want to get out of these "games" it's time to stop being a player

Just do your own thing and a girl will come along. You're pretty good looking so you might not even have to put yourself out there much. Bottom line is do what you want, say what you want, if a girl doesn't make you happy drop her. Stop worrying about the right thing to do and do your thing. That's the right thing.

>>18264299
Lmao are you 4'6"? You ain't even up to the sink boyo. iPhone looking like an iPad in your babby hands lmao

I'm going to both agree and disagree with some people in this thread.

(1) It's fine to want to be in an established relationship before you have sex. For some reason, some people on the internet like to shame others for not having the same personal values or making the same personal choices that they do. You do not need to compromise on your desire to be committed before you become physically intimate.

(2) I agree that you need to cool it with the "defining the relationship" business so early. Start off as friends, go on a few dates, and then ask about exclusivity after you bond a bit. There should already be a bit of emotional intimacy there before you hit her with these sorts of talks.

>>18265696
We've been on two dates in one week and have hit it off really well. But yes I do agree I came on really strong

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OP, you are probably a dork, short asian, even if you are in good shape.

But seriously, what is your height, weight, diet plan, and fitness regiment? You are good looking, I'm mirin, no homo.

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>>18266418
me again. I should give some actual advice, because no bullshit, I really want to know your diet and gym routine.

you have to IGNORE WOMEN. just fucking ignore them. practice on pretty bartenders. I get the best service in any bar I go to because I ignore the female staff. That gets them all riled up wanting your attention. With the bartenders, you need to ingore them and tip them fairly, not too generously.

But with the girls you want to fuck, or date, or whatever, you have to ignore until they express interest,then just go with it.

IGNORE THEM.

>>18264299
OP no offense, but it's probably because of your height and personality
Are you around 5'9" or 5'8"

>>18266449
Lol yes

>>18266423
>>18266418
It took me 7 years to get here. Start simple and have a long term plan. Don't overcomplicate it; a training plan is simply a visual guide to get to your goal.

My goal is to maximize my strength while maintaining my current size. So obviously to keep this size I have to eat 6 times a day. Keep proteins and carbs high, fats around 100 grams. Clean whole foods, no processed carbs pasta sugars cookies cakes pies etc.

Because genetically I have a good chest, I train it only once a week. I train legs and back twice a week because those are important muscle groups to maximize my squat and deadlift.

So honestly - I don't know what your body type is or your goals. Everyone vaguely says "lose a bit of weight, put on a bit of muscle." If that's the case, start eating cleaner, pay attention to what carbs are doing to your body and adjust upward or downward, and pay attention to your lifts and adjust your proteins and your rest days/periods accordingly.


ON ANOTHER NOTE
You guys saw how I gave a fucked up ultimatum to the girl earlier in the thread. I'm wondering if I give her some space and then tell her, "look I understand I gave you a fucked up ultimatum and put you under pressure. I'd hate it if someone said something like that to me while I was going through a rough time..." and then ask her to forgive me. What yall think? We're still chatting on snapchat, just not so much over text.

Bumping my previous question

>>18267144
>dodging the height question
Manlet go back to /fit/.

>>18267637
You asked if I'm around 5'8" and I said yes. Idk wtf you wanted?

>>18264299
I haven't read past your opening post and one of your replies and i already know that you're insecure.
You're in good shape but that is worthless once they see beyond the lie: you're insecure.

But this is OK. We all are. But as time goes by, and our life experiences sum up, we grow wiser, and our insecurities shrink.
When we are young, we try too hard to mask the insecurity.
When we are adults, there is no need because the insecurities are not there anymore.

My advice to you is: give time to time.
Don't try too hard.
Don't worry too much.
Read more: specifically, topics you've always disliked.
Get new hobbies: music, cars, different sports, drawing.
Travel: get to know different cultures.
Explore: get away from the city and feel the nature.
If you feel like, get inebriated (and other states of mind too). Experiment

Life experiences is what makes a man, a man, and this is what women want

>>18266423
This actually works pretty well. If it's someone I see often like a girl from school or work, it works even better if you act kind of like you secretly hate her.

>>18267680
I like this. Thank you senpaI

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>>18264407
Any advice regarding this blunder? Giving an ultimatum and inviting myself over to her place were just bad moves when she needed space after her car accident.
Now it feels like I'm being ghosted. Although we're talking somewhat on snapchat

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>>18264299
Honestly, 4chan is not a great place to ask for advice about women. This is a site full of socially autistic shut ins who never get laid or even make eye contact with girls.

>how do you get a girl to stick around?
How to keep a girl in two words: demonstrate value.

Basically, you want to maximize your Sexual Market Value (SMV). Yes, this applies to real relationships, not just pick up bullshit. Start by maxing your looks, since that's easiest. Dress like a somebody, not a nobody. You're already in shape, and that's great. Get lifts for an extra inch or two in your shoes. We've been told our entire lives it's what's inside that counts. Nothing could be further from the truth. Women, young women especially, are much more superficial than men. LOOKS MATTER. Find a haircut that suits your face, buy nicer clothes that fit your body and learn to accessorize without becoming a total poof.

From there, you just want to present yourself in your best light. Presenting yourself as an "average guy" is just a bad strategy. You want to be above average and frankly, it sounds like you already are. You're in better shape than 95% of men. If you're planning to be a doctor, you have a better career lined up than 98% of men. You want to find ways to steer the conversation in the direction of how awesome you are without bragging.

>I tell them I really wanna get to know them first, they turn it into a game
Women should never be put in a position to lead. Men lead, women follow.

Books to read:
The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene
Models: Attract Women Through Honesty by Mark Manson

Articles of interest:
Calculate your SMV
http://revolutionarylifestyledesign.com/calculate-maximize-sexual-market-value/

Since you're Asian and probably short, you should read this
https://www.goodlookingloser.com/laid/fundamentals/looks-and-style/short-guy-gets-laid

If you dress like an average guy, stop that.
http://www.gll-getalife.com/get-style/dress-like-you-are-somebody

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>>18264299
Date traditional girls. You might have to deal with a Christian to find one but that doesn't have to be an issue unless she's autistic about it.

You sound like a nice, caring guy and frankly man, you don't stand a chance. What would have been normal girls are now trained in playing games and have such enormously high standards that they'll never be happy with you in the long term, and always dream of more - and they'll go and get it. That's feminism, endless romcoms and Tinder for you.

Your best bet is to find a girl who rejects this post modern view of the world and dating, and be upfront with her. Tell her you're looking around for a good woman to have a long term relationship with, tell her your values and aspirations, and tell her if you want to marry and have kids or not. If she's into you and traditional, you'll be her dream husbando.

Even if you find a 'nice' girl out of the rotten orchard that is modern western women, the chances of divorce and her taking your shit because it's so incredibly easy, attractive and beneficial to do so are so high, it's not worth the risk

So that's your quest for the next few years. Search for traditional women who appreciate things like monogamy, having a family, faithfulness, and aren't materialistic fake harpies.

Good luck Op, you sound like a real catch bro. Would definitely hang out with

>>18267787
Wow wtf is wrong with you? Are you that spineless and insecure? Chill out lmao

>>18268699
I took advice from a fuccboi. needless to say I'm never doing that again!

>>18268630
haha thanks anon, I'm leaning towardvthat really

>>18268536
-1 on Asian, ouch. Will definitely look into those links anon

>>18267787

Holy shit talk about being beta, girls only want to fuck you cause you are physically attractive. They don't stick around cause you are a beta splurging boy stuck in an alpha bod. You don't have to apologise and be that clingy. Just chill a bit.

>>18266423
How do you get to the ignoring part without her losing interest?

>>18266449
He clearly still gets girls despite being 5'6" meanwhile you're 6'4" and haven't talked to a girl since Suzie in 4th grade

>>18264299
you need women to become romantically attracted to you early in the relationship if you don't want them to zone you. You are fairly hot, but from your original post, you also sound kind of boring.

>>18267692
Ok let's say you are successfully ignoring her. Then what?

>>18264299

>I don't know what I'm doing wrong
>is there a good strategy I haven't thought of yet?

Have you tried meeting a person and organically trying to become romantically interested in her instead of just going "hey you're hot let's date or some shit" to find someone who might actually mean something to you?

Or do you go trawling the clubs every night looking for some girl without her boyfriend and try to turn a one-night stand into a steady thing?

It's better to have a relationship first and then fuck instead of the other way around. A lot less heartache. At least getting to the fucking part at some point in the relationship helps, though.

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>>18264299
Girl here. DAYUM SON