How do you go around with finding a date if you're asexual?

you don't.
you're asexual, so all you can do is go fuck yourself.

>>18253174
But I'm terribly lonely and want closure.

It's not like I can't deal with sex at all, it's just that it's going to need lube and it'll never be more than tolerable to me.

Just three options:

-find an assexual partner
-git gut at sex to please your mate
-do an open relationship so that someone else can please him for you

I guarantee you it's impossible to have a relationship without one of the above. It's like trying to force a gay an a lesbian toghether. Hust not gonna happen without making all involved miserable.

>>18253196
What does the middle option consist of?

I need lube and generally only try to go for positions where my partner won't see my face (it's easier to keep quiet if I can make a face) but what else?

>>18253208
Watch more porn and copy that.

>>18253160
Hand jobs and lots of them

>>18253245
How do I make that not seem fake?

The best I can usually do is try not to struggle.

>>18253196
It's going to be A or C. B is a fucking ruse and WILL NOT form a good relationship.

Dated an asexual for a year. Sex was always an issue. She put out maybe once or twice a month and I could tell she never enjoyed it but I was the bad girlfriend if I said anything about it. 90% of sex for me is knowing my partner is having a good time.

If you want to date someone sexual you are going to have a lot of issues revolving around sex. If they want to be monogamous with you don't fucking date them. I'm not fucking around here. You will make them miserable while they try to make things "work" and then they will make you miserable because they want to have more sex than you want (which will always be too little).

>>18253160
>>18253180
That's the only way you can go about it, be honest and upfront. People who are down with it will tell you immediately, or be willing to at least learn about it and see if they can try it.

>>18253257
No, it's all the same to me. If I have to do it might as well do the whole thing.

>>18253275
But if I can make myself tolerate it it shouldn't be a problem at all? Then I can put out any time it's necessary.


>>18253279
So I'm just going to die alone.

>asexual
lol this isn't even a real thing
just get a chad to beat the shit out of you and you'll get wet

>>18253287
I don't know. I'm a virgin at 31, I'm far more interested in companionship than fucking at this point.
I'd be willing to work with an asexual. It isn't like I'm expecting sex from anyone else.

>>18253287

>But if I can make myself tolerate it it shouldn't be a problem at all?
How are you going to do this? A bunch of nights with your lover doing everything for your benefit while you "get used to it"? What if that tolerance never comes? Because there's a good chance it won't. How do you think that will make them feel?

>Then I can put out any time it's necessary.
No, you won't. Sex is a two way street. Any decent person knows this and they're not going to force you to do an activity you don't enjoy 100% for their benefit. You're just going to leave them frustrated and upset.

If you don't want to have sex, you need to be okay with them sleeping with other people or they need to be asexual. Otherwise you're just hurting people.

>>18253296
Okay.

I'm 23 and tried dating an older guy once and it didn't work out at all. He was constantly getting mad at me for failing to act his age.

>>18253298
>what if the tolerance never comes

All I need is to get myself to not flinch away and make it credible. I don't see why my partner should know at all.

It just needs to be painless and I'll be fine.

>>18253306

>It just needs to be painless and I'll be fine.

Think about yourself as if you were a lesbian/gay person trying to date the opposite sex. It's not going to work. You're going to make yourself unhappy. You're going to make them unhappy.

If you are asexual, that is your sexual orientation. Live with it and stop trying to find escape holes for dating sexual persons.

>>18253302
That sounds like a different issue, and something that would've happened no matter what. That was his problem, not yours.

>>18253317
I've made it work before.

>>18253320
Yeah. It was all the rest of the relationship that didn't work, the sex was fine.

>>18253306
>All I need is to get myself to not flinch away and make it credible.
Trust me, your partner will not enjoy sex with you, no matter how much you try to make it "credible". Why not have an open relationship?

>>18253336
For the same reason I can't find an asexual.

The circles are small. Finding someone willing to date me at all is just about as high as I can afford to set standards.

>>18253345
Different Anon than the one you replied to.
>For the same reason I can't find an asexual.

What the hell are you talking about? People who are willing to have an open relationship are more common than asexuals.

>>18253358
Never found one, never met one, never seen one.

Besides, why would someone like that date me at all?

File: australia_landscape.jpg (38KB, 720x576px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 720x576px

Funny programs after morning. I want to watch them now:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-0hi1GnPow

>>18253361
I thought that you could get out and try to get a bf. But instead trying to satisfy him with horrible sex once a month you tell him he can get pussy wherever he wants

>>18253367
He can get mine whenever he wants.

And if he wants other people why would he be with me?

>>18253371
Sex and sexual stuff is very important and sexually you practically have nothing to offer. No enthusiasm, no lust, no nothing, you don't even get wet. That's why a heterosexual man would want other women.

>>18253389
But why would he be with ME and not with the other women?

Just because I don't want to do it doesn't mean I can't go through with it. I don't want to go to work, either but I go every day.

>>18253160
Try to cure the mental illness that is asexuality, then go and find a date.

>why don't people over look my unattractive traits
>why don't they check their privilege

>>18253390
I can tell you from a similar experience. I fell in love with my first gf so hard. When I saw her the second or third time I just knew I had to have her. We were both each others first, but the thing was she was raped by her moms boyfriend when she was a child. I loved this girl with all my heart and she loved me with all of hers, but lusting over her only to fuck a dead fish was just horrible. I mean horrible like it made me seriously insecure and irritable.

>>18253405
I'm sorry about your girlfriend.

But I didn't mean that I'd just lay there and sulk. I can put work into it.

>>18253390
It could work. Find a guy with a low sex drive.

>>18253160
Find someone else that is asexual? Have a romantic but not sexual relationship agreed from the start?

>>18253160
You have to state you're an asexual. You're a rare kind so it's gonna be harder to find someone like you.

Asexual? Must be hard living with a disability.

>>18253876
I've never understood why anons tolerate "asexuals" i.e. incels and transexuals. Every other minority or snowflake condition is run off but these two are taken seriously here.

>>18253160
Zero sex drive is a cause for concern, it's not an orientation you fucking numpty.

>>18253160
>I want a relationship with no sex
You mean you want a friend?

>>18253261

>How do I make that not seem fake?

Genuinely want to make your partner feel good instead of forcing yourself like a 10 year old kissing granma on the cheek

>The best I can usually do is try not to struggle.

Jesus fucking christ dude come on
I'm not saying you have a duty or anything but we all learn to fake things for the people we love over our lives, how are you this bad at it ?

>>18253919

incels and transexuals are not asexuals what the fuck are you talking about

>>18253390
While sex is a big part of a relationship, it's not the only thing. People who've been married for years didn't marry because the sex was great, they did because they loved eachothers' personalities.
Don't force yourself into sex. It's not a good alternative. Find someone who you love, and that loves you, and who is ok with an open relationship/never fucking ever. It'll make you both actually happy.

I'm asexual, I'd "date" you but I doubt we're even in the same country. If you're anything like me you'll stop being lonely soon enough. I don't have any real human relationships and I barely notice I'm completely alone most of the time.