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i just visited a psychiatrist for my depression, and got prescribed effexor (venlafaxine). i don't know what i expected to happen, but now that i actually have the bottle in my hands i really don't think i want to go through with this.
i've been struggling for something like 8 years at this point and things haven't gotten any better. i had a short span of like 6 months in the middle of all that where i started pulling myself together, making video games, and felt happy again. i did this all without antidepressants. but then i went back to university, lost all my momentum, and crashed hard basically immediately and haven't been able to get back to normal since.
this has been going on so long i just don't know what to do. i know i got out of this once but i was way younger then, and on top of that anything i can think about pursuing at this point just seems either impossible or pointless (video games seem really pointless at my age now). i was 20 when i was doing that, now i'm 25. back then nobody i knew had accomplished anything and i had my whole life ahead of me. now i know people who are successful in life and my life has basically stood still since 5 years ago. it just seems completely hopeless.
antidepressants will probably help with my mood i guess, but i feel like there's always a rational reason for me to feel the way i do. why would i be happy? my life sucks. i'd really like to get out of this, but i also don't want to be happy doing things i know i don't like. i really would like to have a life where i can be happy without drugs but i have no idea how to make that happen at this point.
i've tried therapy but it hasn't helped at all. should i just kill myself?
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OP have you considered the possibility that happiness is not so much a feeling but a moral obligation?
I want to encourage you to help others while you're trying to figure ourself out. Maybe volunteer at an elderly home or hospital. Doing some good in the world to make others happy might just help
But please don't kill yourself
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I went through a crash and burn type scenario also. SSRIs and SNRIs made me lose my motivation, and I stopped taking them eventually. I do regret taking them because they didn't help me. Sadly nothing helped me besides hitting rock bottom and discovering where my issues probably come from (with the help of marijuana which helps me think deeply and sort through my thoughts), slowly building myself back up and finding myself again. I'm still in that process but feel better than I've felt in a long time. Try to get to the bottom of why you feel like you feel would be my advice. It's easy to just say, life sucks, but that doesn't help and your feelings probably come from something very specific. There is light at the end of the tunnel and you will eventually be better off than you were before you felt this way, no bullshit.
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SSRIs have been extremely effective for me. Sometimes they do the opposite though. Only one way to find out.
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Antidepressants were cancer for me. I went from being skinny to really fat in a matter of months. I also got content being a loser and didnt try to achieve anything because my mood was decent. Learn to use your depression to better yourself. I promise its there for a reason. And no dear don't kill yourself.
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>>18190162
>>18190187
ugh i don't know who to believe.
i really don't feel like i need these things but i don't know what else to do. im really afraid to even just try it for a month and see, because i've read some really gnarly things about this drug coming from those who had a rough time with it. i'm afraid im just going to fuck myself up even further.
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