ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything GUIDELINES: Before you

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So this girl said yes to a date and hasn't exactly responded with her number. I texted her through GroupMe, and yeah it says she hasn't seen the message yet. What do? Should I say something else? What?

My two female friends said I would be annoying her but I don't see how since she hasn't even seen the first message. I know she isn't ignoring me too because we are in the same organization and she wouldn't want to make that awkward on purpose.

What the Fuck just happened?

I met this girl online a few days ago. We really clicked. We need up telling each other that we liked the other. We spent like 9 hours talking today. And mid conversation she closed her account.

>>18187418
Do you ever see her in person?

>>18187418
The text sounds like a girl i know. Initials?

>>18187423
Now she closed her twitter. I tried to contact her there.

We literally spoke for hours then just cut all contact. Probably doesn't wanna be hurt again.

Re-poasting form last bread

There's a girl I met two weeks ago, she's into anime and seems to be kind of aspie like me. We went out for a date last Sunday (27th) and by any count I say it went pretty well, it was about five or six hours at the mall. I'd have called it off some time sooner but she was having a good time and wanted to keep checking out stores. So by the end she seemed happy and we both said we had a good time and she was receptive to the idea of going out again.

After that we texted some more and I suggested we go out again that Friday. Here's where things started getting a little sour. She got fired from her work last Monday and so we went nowhere since she was feeling down about that and I can really sympathize with her on that. The past few days we started texting more and I suggested going out again Thursday and said she could decide where if she wanted and she agreed. When I asked tonight where she might like to go she told me she'd be babysitting that day. Since she lives at home I figured, maybe this wasn't her choice and she confirmed that. I then asked if she'd like to go out another time and she just said 'I guess' a few hours ago to which I've not replied.

>>18187490
It's kind of hard to text with her since she uses short messages. I kind of pass it off to the fact she may be inexperienced like me and she texted that way before the mall date too. Another thing is I work five days a week and am also taking night and online classes so my schedule only has a few openings each weeks while hers is a clean slate.

So I don't know how to read these signals, if she's still in the dumps over the firing or just not interested. So we went on a first date but it seems that she just canceled on the second twice in a row or maybe I'm misinterpreting the situation, I could also have just pushed too hard on going out again. Should I wait out for a week or two before asking her out again? It seemed like liked me but I fear she'll lose interest if we don't go out again. Maybe I should consider phone calls instead of texting?

women
how do you feel about guys with lactation fetishes?

>>18187492
The secret here is to not ask again dude.

Hit her with the ol' "Okay then let me know!" so that the ball is in her court, she knows you're still interested, but she is the one that has to do something about it, and other than that you let it go and assume she won't contact you until she actually does.

Girls:
Would it be weird if a guy you didn't know talked to you after a college class without really pertaining to the class? Like he just started talking to you like he wanted to get to know you?

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Girls, how would you feel about your boyfriend being into shemale porn?

a-asking for a friend.

>>18187636
I don't care.
Porn is porn, whatever you watch is okay unless it involves people suffering for real, kids and animals.

>>18187630
Not weird, but mildly annoying.

>>18187639
>unless it involves people suffering for real
I really enjoy porn where the girl couldn't take the D...

>>18187647
Yeah, and they're faking it.

Unless it's, like, people being abused, hurt, beaten or raped for real I don't really care.

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>>18187618
This seems sensible, I think I'll send that. I don't think it should matter that I'll send it the morning after she texted that, though could it?. Thanks for taking the time to read and respond.

>>18187649
>they're faking it.
It is easy to spot if they are faking, and no, in the scenes I have, they're not, the scenes are usually cut abruptly. I know the time out sign the girl was trying to use, also the position of their hand, trying to push the dick away. There are a few common things whores do when the dick is hurting them. Admittedly there are not many scenes like that, where the girl was a total slut but didn't realize she got in over her head. In fact I have a collection of this type of porn accumulated over the years.

>>18187423
>I met this girl online a few days ago. We really clicked. [...] And mid conversation she closed her account.

It's online. Who cares. That shit happens all the time. She probably either got freaked for whatever reason, was cat fishing the entire time, she got caught doing something she shouldn't have, or any other number of arbitrary reasons that you will never know. Move on. Don't over-invest so much in the chatting stage because 95% of the time, whatever "connection" you build through a screen will NOT translate to real life, and those conversations are all just topics you burn and can't use real life.

I say this as a dude who has actually done online successfully (I.E. many convos, many dates, currently in a long term relationship from it)

>>18187630
>>18187643

Male anon but... It would also really depend on HOW he does it.

Like if you both obviously have a friendly vibe going and you hit it off, then it's going to received pretty well.

But if some desperate as fuck kid comes on, with obviously with alternative motives, just dreaming of that pussy/oneitis/whatever the fuck and not actually trying to get to them them, but instead trying to "win", then yeah. Probably annoying.

And you know how I know that? Because same shit has happened to me as a guy.

It's basic human dynamics bro.

As long as you come in with the mentality of "oh shit. I'm in the wrong. I'm probably going to annoy this person" or whatever the crap, the belies your ability to acknowledge the other person and an actual person--and not some object on a pedestal/conquest/whatever.

Chill. Stop overhyping yourself. Or if you can't, just go out and make the motherfucking BIGGEST ass of yourself so that you're so fucking embarrassed you can't believe how big a dumb ass you just acted like, and then you realize: oh shit, even THAT wasn't that big a deal, and you stop sweating the small stuff like you are now.

Guys, after talking to some guy friends, I get the impression that the average girl treats guys like shit when it comes to dating. Has this been your experience? What percentage of guys do you think have this experience?

>>18187664
I guess I shouldn't put too much into that, just kinda annoyed though

>>18187630
Depends on how, as another anon said. Wouldn't find it weird, but I probably wouldn't get the point of a conversation. Nothing wrong with trying to get to know people, but even I personally have made conversations really awkward by not really having a purpose behind why I'm speaking to someone.

>>18187665
"Like shit" how?

This girl I've been seeing for a week started telling me I should stop hangout with one of my female friends, who goes to the same uni and is working part time as a high class escort.
I understand that my friend is very pretty (like in a way no one would think she's selling sex service), but she has helped me through some tough time. I can't just cut her off.

>>18187606
I think it's a bit weird.

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Guys or girls, please guide my confused mind:

Her:
>I was trying to like you and i really enjoyed the time we spent together, but... I don't know, i don't know if i want to stay with you.
Me:
>Why?
Her:
>[some bullshit that makes no sense]
Me:
>What a load of bullshit. Alright, go figure out whatever you want, I don't want to waste any more time with you, good bye.
Her:
>I think that when I make up my mind I'll end up running after you....

A bit of background info: I'm 24, she's 23, we study in the same college (not same class though), we went out three times and had sex once. There are other girls interested in me.

What the fuck is going on?
What am i supposed to do here?

>>18187425
Yes

>>18187431
SS

>>18187675
But, if your friend offers, would you fuck her?

>>18187675
>started telling me I should stop hangout with one of my female friends
Biological competition. Women do this all the time to avoid competition for mates, whether they admit to it or not. Some are more aggressive about it than others, but the fact that it's only been a week is a bit of a red flag.

>>18187682
>What the fuck is going on?
Depends what the bullshit that made no sense was, since it seems it was weird enough for you to tell her she was wasting your time.

>>18187665
>Guys, after talking to some guy friends, I get the impression that the average girl treats guys like shit when it comes to dating. Has this been your experience? What percentage of guys do you think have this experience?

See, as a guy who has dated a bit, and dated pretty randomly (online dating's pretty good for that) I get the OPPOSITE impression.

I've had some pretty "meh" dates and they don't fucking compare at all to the stories I hear from women (in fact asking about other peoples dating experiences was one of my favorite dating topics).

Like even my worst "bad" stories were always, at most, funny to me. Heck I could ask all of my friends, and I think only one that would qualifies as truly bad.

On the other hand there's TONS of straight up disturbing or terrifying stories you hear from women, and the vast majority of woman seem to have at least one.

If you ask on here, you might get a lot of guys bitching about how hard it is or whatever the fuck, but really, a lot of people who bitch on here do so because they are legitimately pretty shit at dating in the first place and because they are outside of the average experience.

In the end though, the more people you talk to, the more you realize that dating can be pretty shitty and soul numbingly lonely for almost everyone involved--regardless of gender, orientation, race, age, or any other factor.

>>18187667
>I guess I shouldn't put too much into that, just kinda annoyed though

In all my time online dating I think I had three or four people with whom I talked to for more than a few weeks.

I never met any, they all flaked in the end.

On the other hand, my BY FAR best dates were all the ones where we talked for maybe an hour max before deciding to meet up (including my girlfriend)

Really though you're going to have to grow tougher skin if this shit is bugging you. Online dating isn't easy mode, if anything it's more exacting and brutal, the same way "speed dating" can be in real life.

>>18187675
>This girl I've been seeing for a week started telling me I should stop hangout with one of my female friends,
> but she has helped me through some tough time. I can't just cut her off.

Tell her that then.

If she still can't understand. You've been dating for a week. No big loss.

Also, yes jealousy is perfectly reasonable and I could also get why she might find it morally abject for you friend to be doing what she's doing, but it's definitely a hard yellow flag--if not a full red-- if she's trying to tell you who you should be friends with.

If you telling her what this person means to you doesn't have any positive effect, it either makes her a very insecure and controlling person, or someone who doesn't have a very great charity of spirit and is petty in their friendships and judgments..

Neither would bode well for the future.

>>18187673
Shit like leading guys on just for validation and/or free meals or coffee. One friend actually went on a date where the girl sat and talked about the guy she hooked up with the night before.

>>18187705
>I've had some pretty "meh" dates and they don't fucking compare at all to the stories I hear from women
That's really interesting. I think a lot of this has to do with my social circle, all my female friends are genuinely nice girls who wouldn't take advantage of guys. I don't doubt that there are some horrible guys out there, but most of my female friends have dated pretty nice guys. My male friends are good guys too, so I guess that's why to me it seems like the average girl treats guys horribly, rather than the other way around.

>If you ask on here, you might get a lot of guys bitching about how hard it is or whatever the fuck, but really, a lot of people who bitch on here do so because they are legitimately pretty shit at dating in the first place and because they are outside of the average experience.
I always thought the guys here were just being overly dramatic or misogynistic, which is why the more I talked to my male friends, the more I began to question what it's actually like out there.

>In the end though, the more people you talk to, the more you realize that dating can be pretty shitty and soul numbingly lonely for almost everyone involved--regardless of gender, orientation, race, age, or any other factor.
I mean, in the end, I was just asking about what guys' experiences were. I could have asked girls a similar question and I'm sure I'd have received similar responses, just about the opposite gender.

>>18187643
>>18187664
>>18187669
That makes sense. To clarify, I would talk to her in the hopes of getting to know her a bit before asking her out to lunch or something like that if we seemed to get along. She's not a oneitis and I don't want to pump+dump her, she just caught my eye the other day when she went on a ramble about japan's economy in class. It was kinda cute for some reason. It's not often that I see a girl I actually might like, and I'm a KV, so I'm sick of letting chances like this slip by apathetically. I will talk to her, I just gotta think of an opener and work from there. Maybe it'll bug her for two minutes out of her day, but I gotta try something, right?

>>18187736
Ah that makes more sense. I'd say think of something to just open up the conversation.

>>18187719

The thing is,... the girl helped me with sexual release, just for when I was single and horny. It's just friend helped friend scratch an itch, she told me she has been doing it with strangers she doesn't even like, might as well help someone she likes.

I can't just tell my gf that if she doesn't ask...Also I never cheated on her and would never do so.

>>18187739
Heh, that seems to be the hard part. I think I'll bring up something she's said in class, maybe ask her to clarify something or bring up a counterpoint to start with before turning the conversation to something not so school related.

>>18187705
>On the other hand there's TONS of straight up disturbing or terrifying stories you hear from women, and the vast majority of woman seem to have at least one.
I'd like to read some.

>>18187769
I would too, but I don't think this is the thread for this.

>>18187727
>I think a lot of this has to do with my social circle,

So I'm a nice enough guy that literally every single date I've ever had has called me some variation of "sweet" (no joke, they always manage to sneak it in at some point. I just laughed).

So the extent of my "bad" dates tend to be overaggressive women (one tried to stick her hand down my pants, during a daytime coffee date xD) and people who aren't fully sure of their emotions (had a girl text me after a first date that she couldn't date me because she was falling for me but couldn't marry me because of her religion. I was... bemused... to say the least)

But the origin of this shit is mostly, people don't understand their own feelings, so they waffle around, and flake, so people get hurt (but this cuts both ways. I've definitely had it happen to me and I've definitely done it to others). Though there are people who just go out to get a free meal or kill some time--but if I think about it, it's not like I didn't go on dates just to kill time too a lot of times, so I can't begrudge some girls doing basically the same.


>>18187769
>I'd like to read some.

I'll put it to you this way:

On the minor end, guys can be entitled as fuck.
My best friend is gay. She's learned not to say that to guys because it makes a lot of them go HARDER after hearing it. (Hell, I'VE fucking experienced the exact same thing when I hang with her at gay bars and say I'm straight lol.)

Two of the women I've cared about most in my life were raped

On the extreme end: I knew someone who was drugged, raped, and found dead in a ditch (She was actually a close friend of my best friend. I remember her freaking out because she didn't show up for work for a few days. They found her body three weeks later. P.S. this happened in a city that's billed as "the #1 safest city in the country 10 years running". Cops are so bored they will literally send helicopters to interrupt college house parties)

>>18187727
>free meals or coffee
it's not dating then, just a masquaraded form of parasitizm. I know one girl (pornstar-like: she's ugly, both physicall and mentally, but has every right part in the right place) who does it constantly on tinder.
She never wants to date those guys, she knows it from the beggining

>some pretty girl I barely remember told me she has a crush on me since she was a kid
>ok let's fug
>she did not put out after second date
>made me feel like a rapist when I tried to touch her vag

Annoying little cunt.

>>18187902
Did you have a question or?

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>>18187902

Is putting out on the first/second date common? Seems pretty quick imo. Two days of hanging out for 3/4 hours then going straight to sex.

Update from the guy who gave the girl his number at dinner, and asked about if girls like when guys give their numbers

So I never heard anything back, which is whatever, but I did want to ask on how I can go about this in the future. I don't want to give up on this method, so I want to ask how I should do it next time. Because this time she complimented me, but what if there's a cute girl that doesn't say anything. Is walking up, introducing myself, and handing them my number on a slip a decent move? If shes at work or some shit I gotta be fast, yeah?

>>18187978
Do it if it feels natural or you get an opportunity, don't do it if the above doesn't apply. Simple as that.

>>18187606
Eh. I mean, I ain't gonna get pregnant to realise said fetish, but honestly most things that are between two consenting adults don't bother me.

>>18187705
Yea. I know that. I guess I was mostly excited that I found someone who can keep my mind off my oneitis. I guess it's possible that this happened for a reason

>>18187987
>Get the opportunity

I don't know man, I see A LOT of opportunities when it comes to this shit. Basically if she's not talking to someone or looking busy, I see that as a chance to slide in.

>>18188011
Okay, then do it if it feels natural AND you get an opportunity. What are you even asking anymore?

>>18188023
If going up and just introducing myself and slipping the number is reasonable. My problem is people move so fucking fast, it's hard to get them to slow down, so when I'm out and see a cute girl, but there's no "opportunity", what should I do? If confidence is attractive to women it would seem pretty confident to go up, introduce yourself/compliment a girl, give her your number, and say text/call me or whatever, and keep moving, yeah? Like I got the balls to go up and straight up make my point, shouldn't that work?

>>18188030
>My problem is people move so fucking fast, it's hard to get them to slow down, so when I'm out and see a cute girl, but there's no "opportunity", what should I do?
Then don't do it? I literally just said to do it if there's an opportunity, if there's an opportunity then you obviously don't do it? What are you not understanding?

>>18187946
How to deal with her highness, she has been acting like a princess after that date.

>>18188039
>if there's an opportunity
if there's *not* an opportunity, sorry

>>18188039
>If there's an opportunity
>I see A LOT of opportunities
>do it if it feels natural AND you get an opportunity

Ok let's just make this simple, I'll give a scenario

I am at a mall or store or whatever who cares, I see a cute girl shopping (without her boyfriend, preferably). Is it reasonable to walk up, introduce myself, say shes cute, slip the number, and continue on my way? Just a quick interaction like that. I'm asking if this COULD work, and IF it's a decent strategy.

is there a cut off age for it being 'okay' to start balding. if so, what is it?

>>18188091
60.

>>18188061
You gonna address
>>18188068
?

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A guy friend of mine last night hugged me and kissed me on the forehead at a party. Granted he was a tiny bit drunk, but does it mean anything? Could he harbor some feelings for me?

>>18188157
Some people are just very affectionate when drunk.
Including me.

So - maybe, if he's generally not the type.

>>18188000
I mean that maybe i can walk away from this more confident knowing that girls do I fact find me cute and like me for who I am. Even if that girl is a bit crazy

>>18188158
He's usually a bit reserved. If he likes me, why doesn't he ask me out?

>>18188157
wait till he kisses you in the pussy then report back.

>>18188161
I am a very reserved person, but when I'm drunk I hug and kiss everyone without any further motive other than the fact that I'm intoxicated.

And, I don't know again - maybe he's shy, maybe he doesn't think you like him back, maybe he likes you but not enough to date you, maybe he doesn't want to date at all, maybe he doesn't like you.
Just ask him out, if you want to date him.

We can't read his mind. Just ask.

>>18188161
>why doesn't he ask me out
why do you ask? do you feel something when he kissed you? wants his dick already?

>>18188165>>18188163

I like him but I'm a girl, I'm not the one who's supposed to ask him.

>>18188166
Sometimes if you want something, you have to take the initiative. Even if its not the social norm

>>18188166
Lol.
You can ask guys out. It's not illegal.

If you like him, ask him out. Ask him to grab a coffee or to hang out somewhere.

If you want something, sitting there and complaining that you don't have it isn't a great strategy.

>>18188166
I understand that you aren't sure if he likes you the same way and you are afraid of rejection, I do, too. That's why I never ask girls out :)
A way to bypass this problem, from my experience, is by initiating physical intimacy, if he responds well to that, it almost doesn't matter who asks whom out, since you both know where you stand at that point.

>>18188166

Thats bullshit, the girl can ask a guy out. It fucking pisses me off when everyone assumes roles.

>>18188168
>>18188170
>>18188175
>>18188178
Guy here, never been asked out by a girl. Am I ugly?

>>18188182
Not nessicarily. Just not that common for a girl to do.

Girl I'm friends with has pretty much lead me on for the past 2 months. She basically admitted to a friend we share that she doesn't have feelings for me.

Tempted to just cut her out but the problem is since we share a very large portion of friends she's going to be there every time I hang out with them etc. Anyone have any ideas how to deal with this, feeling pretty shit atm.

>>18188185
>not that common

Understatement of the fucking century.

>>18188182
The only conclusion is that you might not be a 10/10 Greek god.

Is it a bad idea to basically ask a girl if theirs any hope for us being together down the line?

Say's she not ready for anything right now. But I don't if its an easy let down or shes serious. As she seems to show signs of interest.

>>18188198
>says she not ready for anything right now

She's not in to you, and that won't change. Move on bro.

>>18188203
Probably. But her whole way of acting is odd. Like she is almost trying to buy time. Well, thats what my friends think atleast.

Girls, do you find it unattractive for a guy to bring home-made sandwiches and a Thermos to university for lunch? Like, if you saw a dude haul it of his rucksack, you wouldn't find it strange?

I feel quite unsophisticated compared to my peers, who are getting food and coffee from the on-campus Starbucks branch every damn day.

>>18188216
Im guy but how buying food makes one more sophisticated? Stupid problem. Eat what you please

>>18188216
>Girls, do you find it unattractive for a guy to bring home-made sandwiches and a Thermos to university for lunch? Like, if you saw a dude haul it of his rucksack, you wouldn't find it strange?

No. I bring home-made food as well. Much cheaper, healthier and easier.

>>18188216

You seriously worry whether what and how you decide to eat is "unattractive" to women? Honestly, get a grip. But no, I've never paid any attention to what guys eat at campus or if they eat at all. Students are broke af anyhow, so bringing food with you just seems sensible.

>>18188216
Nope. I'm not American, I hate starbucks. But it means you're a) capable of cooking something and b) sensible enough to know how to save money. Both are pluses.

>>18188225
>>18188227
>>18188229
>>18188233
Thank you, my friends.

>>18188233
>capable of cooking something
what if I'm not the one who cook it :)

>>18188254
Then eh? I don't know. From your original post I assume you were asking girls opinions for giving a good impression to a potential girlfriend. If you have a girlfirend who makes you lunches, more power to you. Who else would it be?

>>18188258
my roommate, she cooks for me, I teach her math

Girl I asked out and who rejected me now acts in pretty demeaning way. We had some chatterings, she helped me several times with assignments and I helped her, however, if we're in group of other people she tends to say I am "nobody", insults me, and so on. I don't know how to handle it. I also remember I was laughed at for having no experience, my friends always wonder why I don't have a girlfriend, their favorite topic, and it hurts to a certain extent, I really feel a pain in my chest.

>>18188306
Tell that if someone asks
>>18188307
Sounds like youre in anime and she will fall for you at end of the season. Typical tsundere

>>18188307
>friends
>but they insult me
Sounds like some good friends. Just go on a uni thread on r9k, post the name of your uni, and find some new friends

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>>18188312
I am not from US.

>>18188311
>>18188312

Different friends, not those I am speaking about, it was a general statement. She asked me about my experience and I told I didn't have any, asked if I ever had a kiss, told "no" and added that must sound funny, got an answer that "it would have been funny to someone else", sounds pathetic, I know. I wasn't insulted by anyone, only by her and never in private, she initiates contact and writes me, and I might add I am never able to distinguish whether it's a friendly banter or not. If I ever confronted her, would you imagine that? A mumbling silent autist.

I asked her out after she told I am acting strange around her, I was extremely uncomfortable about my feelings, so I decided to slowly drift away. I have already moved on since she straightforwardly told me to find somebody else.

Would it be fine if I told her I don't trust her anymore and we should cut everything related with chatting, except for helping with university trouble?

>>18187403
Where to meet introverted girls who prefer to play games or paint than parties in uni? I do really well for myself but I have social anxiety.

@women

I was browsing Twitter and saw this girl that goes to the same university as me. She's my age and has almost all the same interests as me, and I find her really attractive. I've never seen her in person.

Is there a non-freaky way to get to know her / meet her in real life? I realize how creepy this sounds.

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A lot of girls I know love spanking, but they always want to know why they're getting "punished", and I never have a good answer.

I just do it because it's something they like and I like having them moan and squirm. So what's a good go to kind of answer for why they're being punished? Or what do femanons on here who like being spanked like to hear?

>>18188187
Mention you are seeing other girl from online dating. If she has really no feelings, she will let you go.

But i bet she will get jealous as fuck and something will surely happen.

So, I've noticed that my girlfriend starts acting differently when there's a third party involved. Like, she seems a little distant than usual and doesn't talk much. But, when it's just us, she seems very affectionate.

I don't know if she's ashamed by me with other people or if this is coming from social anxiety or something.

What do you think, femanons?

>>18187957
No, ppl are just thirsty so this happens. But it's a sad reality for a lot of people..

In some cases more understandable than others.. they may have spoken online for weeks, months even, then finally met. they may have just been in it to get as much out of a date as quickly as possible before they go to school or their job the next day..who knows. Dating apps a shit imo, and I'm glad I'm actively staying away from them.

Why is there a stereotype or idea that men think about sex all the time? Don't women think and care about sex way more than men do? I'm saying this judging from TV channels and magazines (or sections in news websites) that are directed to women specifically because they always put a lot of emphasis on sex. Like you can't have something specifically made for men in general because men may care about cars, music, sports, etc. but if it's for women it HAS to have something with sex tips, etc. Like sex is really important, if not THE most important thing to women.
So do women think about and care about sex way more than men do, in general? Is sex the most important thing in their lives to women?

>>18188473
I don't get what do you consider sad about it

What are some reasons a woman might reject a guy after trying to seduce him?

>>18188489

Sex is a physical thing for men, and a emotional/ego thing for women.

>>18188509
it's just as much of a stereotype as the stuff he's talking about

>>18187665
Nope. I have historically been way worse to the girls I date.

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Girls (25-30)
Male,31
Only one PIV sexual experience, and oral 3 experienfes total from different girls, one friend, the other ex.

From your perspective, do you resent inexperienced guys like me? Even if there are reasons why this has happened?

I get the feeling women will think I will easily get clingy, or easily move on after I've gained sexual "confidence". So a girl might feel more inclined to end things quickly.. I hate feeling desperation, but also loneliness. And I just want one good person to heal me, not 5-10 girls before I finally settle... in your opinion, would it be a better idea that I explore first, or settle? I have developed anxiety before due to feeling inexperienced, though I understand how stupid that is, because no matter how I gain it (either waiting for the right one or exploring) I will gain experience..

I wanna break this dry spell with someone who will be there for me.. but I don't wanna give off the impression that I'm clingy.. or somehow in a trance in her presence..which will most likely be the case.. not in an ugly way for me though, but in a really beautiful wholesome way.. and I feel that is repulsive to women.

This is probably my saddest lingering thought.. it almost makes me resent modern sexuality, even though I don't frankly care what others do with their bodies, it is the psychological consequences of sex that shapes people into less empathetic beings, making me also question just how dark my soul will become, as my life is already spiritually dead enough.

>>18188049
Don't go out with her again.

>>18188209
Stop. She doesn't want to be with you. Move on. If something happens in the future, fine, but right now, you're chasing someone that doesn't want to be with you.

>>18188525
is this all in my head?...
nothing an antidepressant can't deal with I guess.

If a girl you met on a night out that you liked sent you this message a week later, how would you respond?

>Hi anon, how are you? I just wanted to say it was lovely meeting you the other night, I had a lot of fun :)

Girls

How much can I push being friendly and getting to know someone before it becomes creepy? I understand you won't know exactly but your advice is appreciated. This cutie invited me and my mate to sit over with her in class but there are only 4 times we come to campus for this class so I really need an alternative way to talk with her and I really want to try date her without repelling her away instantly, I'm happy to just be friends and get to know each other first. She has a GOT sticker on her laptop which i'm a big fan of, should I start with casual interest sharing than ask for her Facebook or something?

>>18188549
I'd think it was cute...
I tried this on my crush, but it took a month before I found a way to contact her online. Now I feel I've either creeped her the hell out, or she just whiped her ass with it and kept on going.

>>18188542
It's not like I'm pursuing her right now anyway. We have been talking as friends since then without any issues. So it at least seems like she likes keeping me around as that.

I just mentioned that possibility as I really don't feel like being unsure with her. If I knew definitely that there's no chance the I probably would ve more comfortable just being her friend. But those mixed signals

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Human females

How do I start a conversation with girls at college I don't know? I feel like if I don't have a legitimate reason to talk to a stranger I'm being a creep and will come across as a stalker.

>>18188562
I feel like I phrased this the wrong way. What I meant was that a girl sent that to me, and I was wondering how I should respond

On average, is it worth sticking around to see what happens if you're interested in someone then find out they have a significant other?

There's a girl that I just started talking to a couple weeks ago, and we hit it off well and even hung out one on one, but she told me she has a boyfriend. I've been in this position before and I'm just curious as to what other people think of it. Break it off? Stick around and see what happens? Try to make a move?

Anyone can feel free to answer this

>>18188527
That might hurt her more than necessary. I just want to release my cum in her.

>>18188363
Bump.

>>18188588
You respond how you feel I guess...

Not everybody feels the same, or the same about who sends the message even..

If. for exp, my crush wrote me back, smitten with me, I'd be in heaven, but I'd try my best to play it cool.. probably fail miserably.

But if now, it was a girl who just wanted to touch base with me and I really didn't have deep feelings for her.. I'd probably.. i dunno.. tell her I think that's really sweet.. but I dunno to the extent I'd allow my feelings to evolve.. since my current crush is my ideal gain, sadly, she doesn't seem to reciprocate it.. so I'd probably give this girl a shot and see how things go.

>>18188591
I'm waiting a whole year to talk to my crush in person again. So, yeah..if you feel someone is truly worth it, stick around. She may lose interest in her current guy.. but you know.. you can also set a time limit for yourself like.. if she doesn't change her mind or has been with this guy for years, better off moving on..

I'm kinda in a similar spot so.. dunno how I'll react till it becomes real, or doesn't.

>>18188368
Art classes?

>>18188613
lol big mistake.
Girls in art classes are the biggest sluts. I mean the fact that they have completely zero inhibition about nakedness is a dead giveaway. (two roommates were girls from "art class")

>>18188368
Here. No seriously, here on 4chan. There's a reason this place attract a lot of the same. Browse around your interests and get to know ppl.

Or, go to a music show associated with your favorite kind of music.

>>18188643
devianart is also a good place to meet quiet artists types.

>>18188393
bumping this plesae

How do you stop being the guy that people like hanging out with, but won't go out with?

A lot of girls like being around me, but when it comes to asking them out, they put me down nicely. It sucks and it makes me think that there's something wrong with me.

Question for both genders.

How common is it that you talk to more than one person you're interested in? Like, do you keep your options open in a sense?

>>18187606
I find the idea hot, if it was a very longterm relationship then I would be interested in encouraging lactation. But realize that it's a commitment, the milk glands can get sore, you can leak milk at the most unfortunate times (if you're actually nursing a special bra takes care of that) and you have to wean yourself off if you want to stop. So it's not something I'd do for anyone and I would not be compatible with someone who considered this the centerpiece of his sex life when it's more just an intriguing/arousing thought to me personally.

>>18188495
Dating apps I mean, kinda degrade social values, we're witnessing it daily.

Speedy sex without intimacy is really desperation in practice. And I feel the things we do out of desperation arev, usually the things that backfire on us the most.. but I'm no expert at this.

>>18188393
Creep more, find people who know her and see if you have a connection (friends with a friend of hers) or can find out which courses she takes.

If you go to a huge university and that's not an option, not really no.

>>18188676
While I agree that many people using those apps and other stuff are desperate indeed, I believe that there are also many who simply like it and genuinely find themselves in this way of living.
I may be a quiet guy, loyal to my rare and long-term partners, but I still enjoy ONS with strangers without additional bullshit once in a while

>>18188670
Male 31

I've done it before, and I realize I do it when my attractions are purely superficial. Soon as I developed feelings for a girl, I stopped talking to people all together. So it really depends on the person I guess, or the amount of friends anyone has at any given time. Personally, I have no irl friends, sept n old lady that feeds cats, so I dunno how good a sample I am for your inquiry.

>>18188399
I would make it into more of a thing. So don't just start spanking her out of the blue but comment that something she said/did/wanted was perverted/naughty/slutty (whichever term she prefers) and she's going to be taught a lesson for that.

Alternatives are blanket statements like "for being such a naughty girl" or spanking harder then telling her "never again imply that I need a reason to put you in your place". Once again depending on the kind of dominance she likes, in this case more towards teasing or more towards aggression.

>>18188686
Tried. No friends in common, and the university has >50,000 students. The perfect storm, lol

>>18188689
I'd have probably done it too had any of them worked, but nothing came of my app dating bs. In a way I'm disappointed, but in another I'm kinda glad? I dunno, I lack experience, but I know I wouldn't be happy if someone caught feelings for me and I only saw them as a physical attraction.. I feel it's dehumanizing.

>>18188449
My first thought is that she doesn't want to become that couple that makes others feel uncomfortable abd/or excluded with how loveydovey they are, but she has a hard time striking a balance between being warm and not being too intimate.
I would just try harder to get her to talk to you, with topics interesting to her and neutral/serious enough that she can't be concerned about sharing that stuff in front of someone else. And then if that fails, confront her afterwards in a casual way.
>hey, I notice you're less talkative in groups, how come?

Don't put the focus on her talking less to you, that makes it very loaded right away and makes her more likely to get defensive instead of considering it earnestly.

>>18188697
yeah, I get what you're saying. I agree
The only thing is - a human consists of more than higher feelings and ambitions. A human is also made of primal instincts and crude, animal ways. Thus I wouldn't call sex without emotions 'dehumanizing'. Low, maybe.

>>18188635
Might be a language issue since I'm not a native speaker but. I take drawing classes and both me and the girls I've met there are like OP described. The fact that we draw naked people to learn anatomy has nothing to do with sluttiness, if that's what you're implying.

>>18188584
Your mistake is feeling like you need "a legitimate reason" to talk to a stranger. Wanting to talk to someone is a legitimate reason in itself. They are free people with a functioning mouth, they can discourage you if they feel like it.

Just start easy. Ask a question about the course material/professor or someone you both know. Grab your first chance to go off topic for a more in depth conversation.

>>18188694
Then I'm afraid there's nothing you can really do. Keep an eye on her twitter just in case she mentions an event she will be attending near university that you can realistically just happen to be at... but other than that it's a dead end.

>>18188670
I don't do this consciously, but if you keep in mind that any friendship or acquaintance can turn into something more theoretically then yes I keep my options open up until falling in love.

Having said that, it's not rare for me to have a soft spot for multiple people (you know, not just finding them cute but also finding them disarming/familiar or pleasant in a way) but I have not had real feelings for more than one person at a time in eight years.

>>18188667
Girls sometimes need to be nudged into considering you as a potential boyfriend. They are on average more saturated when it comes to attention from the opposite sex (especially if you're talking about a cute, charming girl with a big social circle) and in general are less taught culturally to look at men like potential (sex) partners because they're supposed to be more conservative sexually. Because of this, the simple fact that you're a man won't make her necessarily consider you as a sexual being the way it usually does work the other way around where simply being female makes someone sexually interesting.

Don't buy into that retarded red pill stuff. They want guys who are both confident and sweet. But what I'm trying to say is: don't present yourself as her best guy friend. You want to hint at interest in her from the start, by not just having serious talks with her but also teasing her or fucking with her a bit, lightly flirting her and there. Don't stumble over your feet to help her out with all kinds of things. It helps if you can put yourself into a boyfriendlike position by, for example, taking her as a friend to a party where you both don't know virtually anyone. Basically, put yourself on her radar not just as a friendly and dependable person but as a man who sees her as a woman, as someone who can show her a good time, who can not just support/console/accompany her but also call her out on stuff or get her riled up.

>>18188708
It's more than low.. it's cheapening someone. And knowing you are cheapening them. If I had sex with the girl I had a crush on, on say, the second or third day we hung out, I would be extremely afraid of the consequence..

I'd be mad thinking she probably thinks I'm a fuckboi who just wanted to quell a thirst.. and although the thirst is there, it isn't without compatibility.. I'd feel ..afraid I guess. Wouldn't want her to just up and leave.

Some people have long ago liked someone, others fall too quickly in love. But the feeling of being crushed is the same, just a little stronger for others.

>>18187636
As the guy in the situation, let me warn you that unless she's just as degenerate, you're in for a shitstorm of monstrous proportions.

Time to nut up.

>>18187440
>>18187423
Other ideas?

>>18188750
well, I had two very long term relationships. In both cases I had sex with them the very first night we met

>>18188560
Bump before bed

>>18188766
My situation was the same with my ex, sept it was long distance.. so, kinda left no option.

>>18188709
No, it's not about what they do in class. The girls I live with basically run around our flat with their tits out, they never wear anything in the bathroom and every time I meet them they were like "hi, how's your day?". I've seen their vaginas so many times I still remember them, probably more than their faces. I've only fucked one of them because the other one is a lesbian who'd bring a different girl back to our place every weekend. It's the most hedonistic semester I've had, living with them. Also I couldn't date any girl either, upon knowing I was living with these two they just assume I'm the type who has sex with random chicks every week.

>>18188778
It's mostly creepy when you ignore her signs of disinterest.

She has already invited you over, you are free to make conversation with her and get to know her better. Four times isn't that little if you make the most out of every chance. And yes absolutely comment on the sticker - this is the natural way things have always been. Imagine you would be superconfident, would you go "oh cool she has a GOT sticker, but would it be weird to say anything?!"
Fuck no, you would spot the sticker and blurt out "oh neat, I love that show, didn't you think that xyz?" (I don't watch it so whatever is the most current development)

What you're supposed to do is talk/joke/flirt so much that you can establish whether you have a natural click, whether you have stuff in common, whether you like each other. People aren't products you choose out of a catalogue, a girl isn't dating you because you sound great on paper, she's dating you because of the way she feels when interacting with you and the kind of company you offer.

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Probably isn't the thread for this, but fuck it.

Recently got rejected by a girl, but it wasn't really absolute.
>start hanging out
>after about a week she asks what my intentions are, tell her to start a relationship
>tells me she's actually exclusively dating someone
>tells me that she isn't hardcore friend zoning me, something about how she can kinda maybe, possibly seeing it happen
>later figure she met this guy around the time we started talking since I saw her using tinder in class at least a week before I got her number
Is she just baiting me? I can't help but feel that this is some hook to keep me around. And what should I do if it is?

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Girls that use Tinder

Why do you use it? If I want to fuck, what's the best way to tell you?

>>18188806
Best case scenario is that she's too awkward to flatly tell you no, so she tries to give you a softcore rejection with some vague hope for a future that will never arrive.

Worst case scenario is that she's actively trying to make you an orbiter so she has a back up option or can decide whether she likes you better than her current guy.

In either case you should forget about her.

>>18188810
I don't use tinder but you don't tell girls you want to fuck. You flirt/sext with them until they want to fuck you. That's what seducing someone means: making them want to have sex with you, rather than just seeing if they happen to already spontaneously desire you. The latter is very unlikely, especially in an environment like tinder where guys hoping to dick her are all she talks to.

M29

How do I stop becoming clingy and neurotic whenever I like a girl? I'm cool as a cucumber as long as I have no romantic intentions toward then but as soon as it goes that way it's like a switch flips on. This is a recurring theme in my life and it has ruined every adult relationship I've ever had before they even get off the ground.

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>>18187403
I have a slight curve in my dick to the left, would a women find this a problem or not?
Ive heard some find sex better like that but im really self concious about it

>>18188944
My bf has a curve and I love it.

Only thing is I can only give him blowjobs from certain angles because sometimes it hurts or makes me involuntarily gag.

>>18188944
My ex had the same thing, first i honestly thought it looked a lil' odd but didn't really care later on. Sex does feel better because if it but as someone else said BJ's get a little harder (Badum tss) but you adapt to it after a while.

>>18188944
Sounds like bananadick. It's terminal.

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What do women think of their pregnant bodies? Hot? Maternal? Ugly? Out of proportion?

>>18189015
Out of proportion, but beautiful in their way.
Pregnant women just look gorgeous - their skin is so plump and bright, they just look amazing.

>>18189015
Being a mother, and having been pregnant, all I can think of when I see a pregnant woman is a flashback to all the consistent pain in my back, legs, feet, and boobs, the mood swings, the hot flashes, the morning sickness, etc.

When I see a pregnant woman, all I can think is, "hang in there, mama"


As far as how it looks, idk, I'm neutral. All I think is "yup there's a baby in there." Personally, in my pregnant body, I felt disgusting. Like I got the bad end of it all, I got acne, had a huge belly, swollen feet. I was not hot. And really don't expect anyone else to be hot while pregnant either.

>>18189015
it's hot
I've never had sex with a pregnant girl before :(

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>>18188363
>>18188363

Shameless bump. Is it even a good idea to tell a person that I hold no trust?

>>18188925
Bro, you and I both. I dunno if I'd use the word clingy exclusively though, because it is so much more. But upon visual observation alone, that's sadly what it is.

I'm considering starting to take diazepam or xanax to cool my anxiety. Because ultimately that clingy state stems from anxiety or depression I feel, abandonment issues maybe(?)

It's mostly just a really strong crush though, and I'd like my brain to function on a more relaxed wavelength to transmit to her what attracted me to her.

I think if I clear the hump under the influence the rest may sort itself out naturally. If not resort to alcohol or cigs to take the edge off.. but I don't drink (extremely rare) or smoke.

Sad to think that I'd have resort to these methods to overcome my own fucking feelings.. even sadder to think that after all the waiting and patience without such remedies may still yield the old "I'm not available".

There is a friend of mine from university who I have recently fallen for intensely. She graduated last year and I'm about to this May. We're friends from working together at our schools radio station and still see each other there despite being in different phases of our life right now

I don't know how this happened but I feel like I'm drowning in all of these feelings I have for her and if I don't tell her I may die inside. That said, I don't know how to really get that across in a non awkward way. I was planning on asking her if she wanted to chill at a nearby park together the next time I saw her to try and make my intent clear without being too awkwardly forward but even that I don't know.
What makes things harder is that she's traveling to California for vacation very soon and won't be back until after I graduate, and I live far enough from our university that it would be an expensive and timely gamble to hope I run into her by chance here

So I pretty much have to act soon in person, say something via text (this seems like a terrible idea) or not do anything at all

Please help T_____T

>>18189052
Guy here, I just wanted to share my experience

Being awkward is still a LOT better than not telling her or saying something via text. All you really need is to find yourself 10 seconds of one on one time with her and just ask her out for some trivial date.
Yeah, you might sperg out and fail to get your point across but just take your time and if she's worth it she'll let you finish. If she walks away or says you're acting weird, she's the one making the whole affair awkward and she probably wasn't going to stick with you either way.

"well to be honest stuff got messy..the thing is my ex started talking to me again..and it's a long story.. i never wanted to break up but i'm not sure if i want to get back together. so this was actually why i was a bit weird with answering messages and stuff in the last few days"

its oboe isnt it?

>>18187902
Try raping her, if she presses charge tell the Judge she wanted it.

Guys,
You like someone so much that you want a relationship with them but you can't be "just" friends with them. Where is the logic in that?

If you like someone that much shouldn't you just be happy to keep them in your life?

>inb4 "but it's hard for me, muuh poor feelings"
Don't you se how shitty of a person this make you?
If you really cared about the person, shouldn't you consider their feelings to?

>>18189127
They don't actually have the feelings they just like the idea of having feelings for them.

>>18189127

They want to fuck you, not be friends with you. They're actually doing the right thing by making their intentions clear and cutting contact when you don't return those feelings.

If they continued to be your friend, the fact they asked you out would always be an underlying issue. It would be awkward and that person would be forced to deal with the feeling that you didn't see them in the same way they saw you.

>>18189127
They aren't your friends. They are interested in having a relationship with you.
Why would they want to be friends with you if they have other intentions? Why would they want to purposely be unhappy just in order to be around you? Isn't it selfish to even expect them to?

A guy that can draw kind of okay. What do girls think of this.

>>18189201
Not much. It's cool, but kind of whatever.

So i asked a girl out thats in my class in college and she said yes however she has been busy alot with full time job and 2 classes. Up until now she delayed again saying her mother had sugery but she still wants to go on a date. What ive done so far is just texted her to let me know when shes free and then we can go. Was that a bad choice?

>>18189127
kek t8sty b80

>>18189127
I can b just friends with her. As long as I have access to her holes.

>>18189127
In many cases I actually can remain friends in such a situation.

Still, it's evolutionary directed. You like poeple of the other sex (among the other things) for reproduction. Social interactions are important, but not as important as passing your genes

And if I want to have sex with a person this means I value them much more than the others with whom I don't


Also, I totally don't get that inb4

>>18189127
I'd rather take the time off and reconnect just a month or 2 will do, till i meet someone new.

Just helps clear the mind, but the relationship is never the same as it was, since we would only both have so much time to see one another.

You'd potentially have a new relationship and so would I. Chances are we probably wouldn't do the same jobs and we might have different social circles. Might have our own hobbies too. There often wouldn't be enough time to see one another as much.

>>18189165
>>18189184

If they just want to fuck, I get it.
But if they want a relationship, I don't.

As I said, if you care that much about a person, why would you just care about your feelings and fuck them over by making them loose someone they put time and effort in being a friend for?
If you want a relationship it's more than just sex and you obviously liked their personality. Why would you throw that away just because you can't deal with them not wanting to be more intimate with you?

Feelings go away and you can continue with the friendship. It really isn't that big of a deal, it will only be awkward if the guy makes it awkward.
How is it selfish after putting months or years into building a friendship with someone and telling them personal stuff about yourself to be upset because they just break that of because of their ego being a lil' hurt?

>>18189292
wait so it's ok for them to fuck you? how could any guy not be friends with you lol

>>18189292
All relationships are an investment. Friendship, romantic relationships, parenthood - you invest your time and your energy into being close to someone and make them feel good, you let yourself become vulnerable to bond with them properly.
Time is a limited resource, energy is a limited resource, being vulnerable is probably the scariest thing ever.
It'd be stupid to invest and take risks into something that doesn't give me what I want.


Why would I willingly put myself into something that makes me ultimately unhappy (because you're not giving me what I want)? Why would I invest my limited resources into getting something that isn't fulfilling to me, while I can invest those resources elsewhere?
You might be an amazing person and you might be a great friend, but the world is full of great friends and great people and I can find someone who is willing to be my friend and also my partner. You're not willing to do it, but there probably is someone else who is.
Why would I put your feelings over mine? Why would I put your happiness over mine? Why would I want to be around you and keep hurting myself when I can just stay away from you and look for someone who actually makes me happy?

You're basically asking why a guy who spent 800$ to receive an iPhone wouldn't be happy if you offered him a Nokia 3310 because "it still makes calls and texts".
You're not giving them something that is good enough for the investment they're making, and you're not giving them what they want.

Girls, guys:

Ever noticed someone rising on your friends list on facebook and even appearing as a 'close friends' suggestion?

Am I being stalked? Is that person crushing on me? Is it totally random?

>>18189292
>>18189254

>>18189322
So their is no deeper meaning or reason than people just being selfish douches?

>>18189340
do you realise that *you* have some problem, not them? A mental problem I mean. This is not to insult you, just to bring it to your attention. Thinking that everyone is selfish, because they care about their own happiness isn't normal

>>18189340
If you care so much about them, why can't you just pretend you love them so you make them happy?
You're asking them the same thing - to pretend they want to be your friend so they can avoid hurting you.
It's not selfish. You want different things.

>i bet you say that to all the girls
what does that mean lol

>>18189352
They're probably playfully accusing you of only saying whatever you said to try and get into their pants, and they want you to say or do something that shows that's not your intention (or at least not your sole intention)

>>18189356
what if it's a statement about farts?

>>18189365
wtf did you tell her about farts to where she responded with "I bet you say that to all the girls"?

>>18189368
About her fart. Yeah._.

>>18189372
What did you specifically say about her fart?

>>18189356
i told her i was a psychopath lmao

>>18189375
that I love the smell and I know it's her?

>>18189339
>>18189340

>>18189350
I have asperger, I don't get social codes or other people, but I'm trying to do it now, as you can see.

>>18189351
But the most common thing to think when getting to know someone is that it's going to be a friendship.
If it's other feelings than that you often show that early on.
If you develope feelings later on you still started it as a friendship. Aka, you were already friends to begin with. I don't start it as a relationship then just tell them to be my friend.
And there is also not really that much stuff in a friendship that you wouldn't do in a relationship. But that is not the case the other way around.
So I don't really get what you mean.

I recently found out this girl in my class speaks Spanish. Would it be too creepy if I tell her I like her or ask her out in Spanish? (this is my first language). Also, I would do this to avoid looks from the guys around since it class is 80% male

>>18189384
Okay yeah then what I said applies. She probably said that to kind of be like "I bet you're saying this to try and make me feel special even though you don't actually think I'm special at all". Might be just a playful joke and she knows that you do actually care about her, might be her secretly voicing her insecurity/fears that you don't really care about her (or you only care about her because she's got a wet hole you'd like to fuck asap)

>>18187655
>>18187492
>>18187490
So I've gotten a response of 'K' for that.

>>18189395
>only care about her because she's got a wet hole you'd like to fuck asap)
wait, this has always been the case with any girl ever. Thought women are proud of their sexuality? if a girl only cares about my dick I'd be flattered.

>>18189400
Idk about other chicks, but I want the guy to be interested in who I am, too. Sure, sometimes it's flattering when a guy wants the pussy, but pretty much all the guys want all the pussy so that's not really anything special. What is special is a guy who wants to fuck the pussy /and/ think the girl attached to it is fun and interesting

>>18189417
well, how fun and interesting are you

>>18189432
Hmm, not sure. My self-esteem issues make me pretty biased, but I've been with a guy for over 6 years now and he seems to think I'm special, and not just cuz I've got pusspuss

>>18189127
>You like someone so much that you want a relationship with them but you can't be "just" friends with them. Where is the logic in that?
>If you like someone that much shouldn't you just be happy to keep them in your life?


Yes and no.

So one day I met someone that I came to legitimately respect and admire as a person. Talking to her, hearing her story, she inspired me in a time when I was at one of the lowest points in my life. I literally remember thinking that very same night after talking to her, "This is it. This is my turning point. Nothing will be the same" and I changed.

As the months went by, as fate would have it, I bumped in to her again. She actually ended up being roommates of another friend of mine. And so we started hanging out.

The more time we spent together, the more closer we got. One day, after about half I year I started to realize... oh shit... This is dangerous... I think I'm falling head over heels for her.

After a few weeks of strangeness, she confronted me and asked what's up, and I told her. And at first she was incredibly elated--twitterpated and excited in a way i'd never seen before--but my own veneration for her had created a sort of imbalance when it came to emotional connection, and it was just too much, even for me.

I legitimately had a moment where I thought, "I'm being fucking crazy right now. But fuck it".

Anyway, it all went down south soon after (which is probably for the best) and we stayed friends. I still respected, admired, was grateful to her, and wished her all the best, but I couldn't be around her at the time because as much as my logical mind wanted all that for her, my emotional mind was still too fucking wrapped up in all the craziness.

Ultimately, the only thing that could fix that was time. it took me about 3 or 4 years and meeting my girlfriend to fully break from that all and realize, "Oh hey, I'm fully over this person and ready to move on"

In the end, logic has very little place in emotion.

Recently, a friend of a friend told me that I'm "sort of intimidating", while our mutual friend nodded along. I was so thrown at the time that I didn't ask what he meant, but I'm really confused here. What does it mean if a woman is called intimidating? It's really not the image I'd want to convey to people. I'm relatively socially adept and friendly towards people and not by any stretch of imagination argumentative or aggressive.

>>18189450
>What does it mean if a woman is called intimidating?

We can't tell you what specifically it is. We don't know you.

I know my girlfriend thinks my best friend is also apparently "sort of intimidating" (with her all of 5'2" tiny girl stature haha)

To be honest, I don't really see it because for one, I've probably known her too long, and two, apparently I'm a "sort of intimidating" guy myself with a similar character... so take this with a grain of salt:

I've asked, and basically for us it boils down to:

There's a certain air of absolute confidence and intensity of convictions there.

In her in particular, when she believes she believes, and so she acts exactly in her own particular way and gives no fuck about what anyone else thinks. She has her own particular sense of style, she dances to her own beat, she likes what she likes and it's for a reason all her own. When she's there, if you're not sure of yourself, you get sucked in to her pace.

Apparently I have a similar thing going about me, but it comes from a slightly different place where I just give off an air of knowing shit and subsequently of absolute competence. I can lead a discussion and just as easily meld in to the background, but it's done with ease and an air of halfway not giving a fuck because I am who I am and don't need to show off or stand out or hide away, I can exist all on my own and make my own amusement out of nothing and if you want to tag along, awesome, if not, no big.

If it's not getting in your way, Intimidating isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's just different. Personally, I've always found I'm at my best when I'm different (not because I'm trying to be, but because I'm following my own path and that path is naturally not the same as anyone elses).

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Ladies:

Why would you give your phone number to a guy who clearly expresses romantic interest in you when you already have a boyfriend?

>>18189450
If, you're a woman, being called intimidating can mean that you're so beautiful guys and women are nervous around you because of your beauty. Guys because they are inexperienced and women because they are afraid you might steal their man.

>>18189515
How has he clearly expressed romantic interest in her? Do you have more context for the situation where she gave him her number?

>>18189447
Thank you for sharing that. I really appreciate getting to understand this from the other perspective.
I'm really sorry tho because I don't get what you want me to take from that?

Now speaking in general:
I get that feelings won't just go away because the other person doesn't feel the same.
But I still think breaking the friendship off is selfish.
I get that in this case maybe you have to be selfish if your feelings are really strong.
But I still think that putting your feelings over your friends in that kind of way is selfish.

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I think I'm about to ask out a colleague of 1+ year. We haven't gotten to work together much, if at all, but I've been eyeing her for the entirety of the year and I think she's been noticing all along.

How would you rate this opener? This will probably go through WhatsApp or Slack as we're on different floors.

>hey x, i'd really like to get to know you better, so would you be up for some coffee and chat in private?

I like being dead-honest about myself, so if all goes well, I plan to tell her that I thought/knew my interest in her has been pretty much obvious lately, but that I've just been able to build up the courage to ask her out.

>>18189515
If this "clear expression" is actually clear, they're not faithful or think they can just be friends with you despite your interest, that you'll lose interest soon enough and you can still be friends.

Also, politeness. I give my number to dudes I have no interest in all the time just because some situations it's rude not to. Never contact them though.

>>18189392
nah, might be cute even. However never ask a chick out in front of other people man, just puts them in a weird spot because no good chick is gonna feel right about publicly shooting a dude down, even if it's in a language they aren't sure anyone else will understand.
Pull her aside privately.

So I've been friends with this girl for a while, we're super close and all that, practically best friends. We've acknowledged that we also have some romantic feelings for each other, and we've acted on them (lots of cuddling/touching, mild sexting, and we even slept together once), though we never became a couple. Recently, she's expressed interest in a friend of mine, and we've drifted apart a bit (no more romantic stuff at all). Is there something I can do about this, or am I just fucked?

>>18189560
>Also, politeness.

This. Well politeness and I also have no spine when it comes to letting dudes down. Had a coworker ask for my number, he gave the excuse of "so we can trade Pokemon". He asked me when other people were around, and it wasn't him explicitly expressing romantic interest in me so I didn't want to risk being /that/ girl--y'know, where the guy just says hello and the girl instantly cuts him off by mentioning that she has a boyfriend. So between that, not wanting to hurt his feelings by rejecting him, and not wanting to publicly embarrass him, I gave him my number and then never texted him the entire time I worked there.

>>18189552
That's a bit plain, but also seems like it might be effective. I say go for it. If it doesn't work, oh well, you hardly work together, as you said, and if it does, great job!

>>18189568
don't do that...

telling him you have a bf is the right way

always. cuts the emotional build up short, you're only prologing pain.

>>18189541
>But I still think that putting your feelings over your friends in that kind of way is selfish.

So when that all went down I was 22/23. It's been over half a decade since then.

In a way, I guess you could say that, it was selfish. But regardless of that, it was a decision that NEEDED to be made for my own sake at the time.

My respect and admiration for her never went away. To the day I am grateful to have met her.

But she doesn't own my life.
I don't owe her anything.
She doesn't owe me anything either.

A friendship is supposed to be a mutually beneficial, not harmful, nor one where people are indebted to each other.

Ultimately, if she was my true friend, what she wanted for me was to grow as a person and live a happy life. Ultimately what I wanted for her was to grow as a person and live a happy life Those good intentions are what make a true friendship. Neither of us were entitled to anything from the other. We simply wish each other the best

I went my own way because whatever I thought of her, however I felt of her, the best thing in life would be to move on, grow, and become better. She had her own path and she needed to do the same in her life.

Sticking behind and getting caught up in the past wouldn't be fair to her because then I wouldn't be being a true friend, i'd be staying behind with impure motives that held me back, and that would probably hold her back in some part too. I trusted her to have enough sense to let me go my own way with no hard feelings, because I knew she wanted me to to grow too.

You don't have to be in each other's minds and presence constantly to be a friend. If all your connections and good intentions are gone the second they're out of sight, that is a petty and immature way of thinking.

Are there people who are petty and just bail because they can't handle feelings?

Sure.

But life can be more complex than that too.

>>18189589
He might not have been romantically interested though. I thought he might be interested, but I didn't want to assume his friendliness was interest

Girls: There is a girl I work with that one day started to text me. Now we text pretty regularly. She tells all kinds of stuff, personal stuff, random pics, even asks me for advice. Nothing is ever sexual, or suggestive, and she knows I have a girlfriend. I still can't figure out what her motive is, or why she started in the first place. I can't help but feel she is being subtly flirtatious with me. Does it sound like she has a thing for me?

So I used to be rather close friends with a girl in my class and, sort of broke away from her unintentionally. I'm curious on ways that I can restart this friendship without making it awkward considering I've basically been unintentionally distancing myself from her.

>>18189567
>Is there something I can do about this, or am I just fucked?

I'm a dude... but unless she's trying to play you to get a rile out of you and get you to finally take fucking action, probably just fucked?

Look man... you had your shot. It was practically a sealed deal. But you never fucking took it. If you jump now it'll just make it seem like you're knee jerking because you're feeling possessive/have been taking it for granted that she'd always be a backup girl on the side for you.

As the saying goes, either shit, or get off the pot. Take another shot if you want it, but learn from this fuck up, and realize you can't take shit for granted.

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>>18187403
what are some things that make you think a guy's gay?

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Girls

Why do wear this over normal training shorts when working out? Is feeling sexy so important?

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Girls,
What's the rules for boners?

If a man gets a hard-on while dancing with you, is that attractive? Or is that gross? Am I supposed to try and suppress my boners during dances, or is it something to encourage? As a man, am I expected to better control my urges and hide my shame?

Recently, I got a boner just by walking a drunk girl home from a party, even though I knew nothing would happen that night. Is that normal, or does that hint at patheticness that merely talking to a girl would get my juices flowing? Also, is it something one is expected to hide, somehow, from passersby? I got very paranoid that someone from my classes would cross paths that night and immediately notice the bulge in my pants.

>>18189623
Because its comfy.

>>18189623
Stretchy pants are comfy af, and idk about other girls but when I'm on my period, stretchy waistbands that give some gentle compression on my screaming uterus are a godsend. And I don't work out but I do know that working out would make me feel gross, and so to help make me feel better I would wear stuff that makes me feel less gross

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Girls

Why is me talking about my faith openly on facebook (I don't do it every day on every hour or anything like that) grounds for them to tell me how cringey it is? I have made posts that are FAR more cringey that I didn't think they were at the time that isn't related to my faith. My ex's best friend's boyfriend told them that I should seek out a suicide hot line and laughed about that.

I found comfort in Christianity and the lessons it has taught me and its allowed me to move on from whatever happened in the past but I thought this was screwed up, especially the suicide hot line bit.

I'm not looking for validation to hear I'm more mature, what is the legitimate reason for them to act this way?

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>>18187902
>Annoying little cunt.

Ah damn yeah. I can just smell the kind of guy you are from your post. Even if she likes you, putting out normally doesn't happen until at least the 4th or 5th date. Did she say you could go down and touch her there? If she didn't, then yeah, you probably deserved to feel like a rapist. You gotta get consent to these things first, no matter what 4chan might have brainwashed you to believe.

>>18189645
>what is the legitimate reason for them to act this way?

This may shock you, but they're probably just assholes.

>>18189645
Hating on religion and being uncomfortable with religion is a popular meme now, all the cool kids are doing it instead of being decent human beings. That being said, even making a post about your religion every day is kinda cringey. You aren't your religion, your religion is just a part of who you are. If most of your posts are about praising Jesus, then yeah people will get tired of you talking about mainly one thing. Kinda like vegans talking about being a vegan and making their identity revolve around one thing

>>18189617
He likes cock.

>>18189645
Some people find religion cringey. They consider it something you should keep to yourself. You're perceived as breaking social norms by not doing so.

>>18189623
To attract dudes.
the comfy line is usually just us not wanting to admit we want dudes to check us out and fuck us, less we sound like sluts.

>>18189630
Ehhh, random boners are understood, but not particularly a turn on either. We get it, shit happens, if our junk immediately gave us away we'd have the same problem.

I would not be advertising your boner outside of a private encounter that's already in the direction of having sex. So yeah, I would hide it to the best of your ability because it is awkward. But if you're found out, its not that huge a deal. Usually we'll just ignore it.

>>18189613
You're probably over thinking it. Just start talking again.
"Hey whats up anon, been a while how ya been?"

>>18189650
>That being said, even making a post about your religion every day is kinda cringey.

Oh I understand that, I suppose the time I thought that would be okay to pass before sharing or posting anything may be too little.

>>18189649
>>18189650
>>18189660
Makes sense, it never occurred to me because I have people added who share their faith but I wasn't bothered by how much they decided to be open about it but I suppose not everything can be sunshine and rainbows.

>>18189623
how do i get an ass like that?

>>18189616
It wasn't really a sealed deal though. We chose to not become a couple because she was recovering from a breakup. Now, she's just about over that, and nothing has changed from me, but she suddenly wants my friend instead? Feels pretty bad.

>gets gf
>all kinds of wild fucking
>she licks my ass
>i eat her pussy
>busts multiple nuts inside her
>loses gf

now i cant stop thinking about all the people shes fucking at the moment, and i feel like a cuck because i jerk off to it.

>>18187665
It is not quite my experience. Before the date, maybe a bit, it is hard to know girls that show interest in you, probably because of the number of guys that hit on them everyday. If she doesn't show interest in knowing you, if she is distanced and closed, I move on, it's her loss anyway.

So I only date girls who show *some* interest in the first place.

Now when it comes to dating, what happens is that about 80% are nice normal dates, and about 20% (I am making this numbers up, it is just to give the idea that it is not the majority) try to play games or are a bit bitchy. I don't know why, could be a shittest, could be that they are a bit bitchy, could be that there was no connection and they regretted the date, could be that I am not showing enough interest and they defend themselves that way.

I don't let that affect me, there is plenty of fish in the sea and I prefer to wait a bit for the right catch then to bend over backwards to get laid

>>18189687
You have good genetics in the first place and then work out enough to get it.

>>18189689

Basically you were her emotional rebound and now she's ready for a real relationship.

>>18189694
nothing I can do to change that? I mean, I'll live if she just wants to be friends, but I'll miss what we had.

>>18188157
>>18188161
>>18188166

There are guys who are reserved and can only express what they feel if they drink a bit. That might be the case. He might like you or not, no one will be able to figure that out from two lines of text in a vietnamese imageboard.

What you have to think about is weather you like him or not. If not, its all good, if he ever makes a move you can then decide how to proceed. However, if you do like him, consider about making a move yourself. Even if he likes you, he may never take the initiative for fear of rejection. There is no shame in asking someone out and not be corresponded. At least you tryied

>>18189655
You're a Godsend, anon.

>>18189673
I mean, can it be seen as a sign that we're into you? Is it a compliment like that? Were you, say, grinding up against my crotch, would a bone there be appreciated?

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>>18189705
Just doin the lords work my friend.

So, this girl I'm into may or may not have been broken up with. Should I text her today and see if she wants to go out? How should I phrase it? Should I ask if she's single now first?

Or should I ask her out when I see her this weekend? I'm only like 40% sure she's single now.

>>18189708
Well I mean yeah, its 9 times out of 10 a sign you're into us. But are we into you?
If she's grinding all up on your cock on the dance floor, shes probably into you so sure. She'll likely pull you off to go fuck at some point in the night anyway.

But in other situations, when nothing sexual is going on, it's not much a compliment. Just uncomfortable. If you get a hard on just talking to me, I'm not always talking to you because I'm interested in you sexually. So yeah, if I talked to a dude in a friendly manner, but not sexual or romantic, and I catch that he's raging out down there I'm probably just gonna get out of the conversation as fastly and politely as I can because that's not something I'm interested in.

>>18189710
Damn boy give the chick some time to mend her heart before you go tryin to stick your dick in her

For dudes:

Say you had a friend-of-a-friend/acquaintance of two years who you were attracted to and finally got a chance to give it a go.
How would you feel if, before you had a chance to seduce or 'win her over', she basically jumped on you and admitted she'd wanted you the whole time?

Would it be disappointing to miss out on the chase and feeling of accomplishment, or would it be an ego boost to have an attractive, hard-to-get girl want you so badly?

>>18189719
It's been almost 3 weeks since I found out.

>>18189722
Oh alright, you good

>>18189721
Ego boost for sure. All guys pretty much dream of that exact situation happening, so I'd say go for it.

>>18189594
Thank you for that perspective.

>>18189729
So... what do I do?

Girls, you're vagina is really comfy, did you know?

>>18189752
I'd say wait until the weekend, that seems like the best option to me. I know it sucks to wait, but I feel like trying to basically ask if she's single via text might make her feel like you're trying to jump on her as soon as she's available. Which, that'll feel flattering later, just not an ideal feeling for someone who just got burned by a dude

>>18189717
Please, don't flatter yourself.
9 out of 10 times your boner has no relation to how attractive you find your company or how aroused you are

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>>18189766
Idk man, granted I have not talked to many dudes who get boners in non sexual situations but I would say most dudes are not getting boners talking to random chicks unless they are some degree of attractive.

That is, if you're not a teenager.

>>18189687
Squats. If anyone really wants a good looking body you can get it with enough work.

>>18189775
It might surprise you, but hormones and hormonal fluctuations are not exclusive to teenagers and woman.

>>18189721
Fuck the chase. I want the girl.

>>18189717
Is there any real way to mask a boner? Like, what are the go-to signals that draw your attention to that fact? I just used to lean back and prop up one leg against the wall, trying to block my crotch

>>18189775

Personally, it's the fact that a (pretty) girl is interested in me at all that does it. As in "Holy shit, she's actually coming over to chat with me?! I dunno what to do. D-does this mean she finds me attractive?" Stupid shit like that.

>>18189789
Yeah, but seriously, 90% of the adult male population are not popping boners ever 4 minutes. Yeah, adult men will have the occasional random no good reason boner, but not frequently enough for it to be an issue to talk about on chinese image boards.

>>18189612
Bump

>>18189816
Whatever floats your boat hun

>>18189811
Idk man, I don't have a dick.
I've heard some dudes talk about tips, like tucking it into your waistband or something. Also, maybe just don't wear tight pants if you have a problem with it. Honestly if you're getting boners over everything though, I might talk to your doctor about that.

So yeah, this is a specific case of you do find the chick attractive. That's cool, can't help what you like, but still you gotta figure something out man. First of all, sounds like you need a confidence boost or something, you overreact to women. They're not that big a deal, even the hot ones.
But again, if it happens, fine. Just don't deliberately call attention to it.
>>18189826
Ok man, keep pretending it's perfectly normal to have a boner 24/7 for no reason at all lol.

>>18189201
Define kind of okay. Probably nothing. But then again I draw more than kind of okay so I dunno.

>>18189829
>I can't read

By all means, keep feeding your delusion.

You are totally the cause of every boner in your vicinity ever, not just narcissistic. Makes way more sense

>>18189612
It's honestly really hard to tell from that. She could be being flirty, but she could also just be looking for a good friend. Either way, you're fine.

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>>18189841
kek. I was saying every boner I've come across came from a sexual encounter. I have never come across a random boner in my life, and neither have any of my friends.
I'd say that you have intentional boners more often than you have random ones, therefore, yes, 90% of your boners are intentional, from seeing or being with an at least fuckable chick. Unless you're trying to tell me dudes have absolutely ZERO control over themselves and their dick just waves freely unattached to you or something.

No where did I say that chick was me. Project harder man.

>>18188187
Bump?

>>18189845
It just bothers me that I can't tell, lol.

>>18189854
You have so little understanding of the male condition that I'm starting to think you're a mra false flagger.
>the girl wasn't me

Really

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What does love mean to you? How do you know if it is true love?

>>18188187

What do you mean by "lead me on".

>Have you been dating?
"Hey <anonete>... it's been cool seeing you, but I don't feel like we have chemistry". Done.

>Has she just been flirting?
Go live your fucking life and stop trying to drum up drama by "cutting people out" Just stop responding back.

>>18189867
Again, I was never claiming to be a hot chick who experiences dude's getting boners left and right, you're just buttmad and insecure about yourself, so you think tearing anyone down who even so much as appears to have a high self esteem will make you feel better. But bro, I am not a hot chick and I will never pretend to be one.
I'm an average chick who pulls average- below average dudes. I've been around a little, but not a ton, because most dudes do NOT get it up for me.
Because most dudes only pop boners for hot chicks. (See where I'm going with this?)
If what you're saying is true, my ugly ass would see a lot more boners. But I don't. Because you all typically need a hot chick to spark said boner.

There, that make you feel better? I'm not trying to boast about "omg I'm so hawt ALL dudes want me!"
No, I'm an ugly sack of shit that really no dude wants to fuck, and that exactly proves my point. You don't get boners for ugly chicks, and you certainly don't just walk around with boners all day every day for no damn reason. Maybe every now and then, but not enough to be an issue.

We done now?

>>18189829
Thanks. Rando boners aren't so much a thing anymore, and this latest girl in question was definitely into me, at least, so no worries there. I was more worried about what other people would say if they say me sporting a boner while walking a feisty, drunk girl back to her place, but hell, I doubt they'd be looking for anything down there anyway. I just hope I don't come across as pathetic.

>>18189877
Well I mean, most people are gonna be concerned if they see a drunk chick heading out with a dude who's clearly ready to go, that is, at least if he's not just equally as trashed. (but with todays feminist culture, who knows, you're a rapist if you fuck a drunk chick even if you're worse off than she is) So just be careful about it all man. Morally I and most sane people will find there's nothing wrong with 2 drunk people making a mistake. But the law might disagree with you, and she's got more privilege than you.

But this is more a rant about "don't fuck with drunk chicks because they can literally throw you in jail at the drop of a hat if they wake up and decide you're not as hot sober as you were drunk."

I suppose this is a question for any women in the thread, but anyone's answer would be appreciated. I have two different girls I'm interested in, currently am dating neither. Both of them might be potentially interested in me tool, but obviously nothing can be known for sure. I'm not sure which one I should make a move on, and I'm here to outline what I see as potential pros and cons of each, lets call them E and S.
Pros of E:
>Higher ceiling of a potential relationship
>If she says no, I don't risk losing a close friend
Cons of E:
>She has kind of a crazy friend she's really close with I slightly worry about
>Lower floor of a potential relationship
Pros of S:
>More likely to say yes
>More stable, and higher range of how a relationship could go
>Cons of S:
>If she says no, I could lose a close friend

If there's any more info you want to try and asses, I can happily give it to you. Thanks.

>>18189854
>I have never come across a random boner in my life,

Another anon chipping in:

If you're a dude: Bullshit.
If you're a chick: You're uninformed and spreading misinformation about something you have no clue about.

Fuckin-a, just do some basic googling and your entire post gets thrown out the window:

Literally the first result for "random erections"

http://betterthansexed.com/is-it-normal-to-get-random-erections/

>>18189888

I'm going to add to this conversation >>18189630

How often have you noticed OTHER dudes have a boner?

Basically fucking never right? Same shit. Tuck it away and stop overthinking it.

>>18189888
Read the context. I'm not saying it never happens, I'm saying it doesn't happen NEARLY as much as your intentional boners, and you aren't having such a fucking issue with it every day of your life that you find the need to ask adv about it.

>>18187490
>>18189399
Funny how I was convinced I could handle her not being interested but I'm beginning to feel depressed about it. I can't read signals well but I'm beginning to guess she isn't that into me anymore. I feel so upset and unwanted, I just want to become withdrawn and be alone. If anyone can help me I'd appreciate that.

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>>18189895
Got it

Am I wrong for thinking my bf is too passive because he didn't get mad when his autistic friend slapped my ass/flirted with me behind his back?

He basically thinks its my responsibility to tell his friend to fuck off, which I have multiple times. But then he himself won't confront his friend and just makes excuses like "he's a good guy he's just retarded and doesn't realize its wrong".

Am I really the bitch in this situation cuz I don't think I am and I feel undervalued.

>>18189922
Idk man, dudes literally retarded. Retarded kids do stupid shit.
I'd just stop associating with the tard.

>>18189875
Projections, assumptions and to top it all, bitterness.

And I was talking about context not frequency, as you clearly didn't understand, hence you keep blabbering about " boners left and right every four minutes".

Simply put, correlation does not imply causation.
And your assumption that if a guy has an election while talking to you (or lthers) means he just must have poor self control over his arousal and get boners every time is just offensive and ignorant.

>>18189904
>I'm saying it doesn't happen NEARLY as much as your intentional boners

http://www.sexhealthmatters.org/did-you-know/male-erection-frequency

>The average man has about 11 erections each day and several more at night.

>But these erections don’t always happen because a man is sexually excited. Sometimes, there is no sexual stimulus at all.
>Another type of non-sexual erection is the reflex erection, which can happen when a man is nervous, scared, angry, or under stress
>Reflex erections are more common in a man’s teenage and young adult years. Many adolescents worry about getting erections at the “wrong” time, but reflex erections are a normal part of growing up. As men get older, the frequency of reflex erections tends to decrease.

http://teens.webmd.com/boys/questions-about-erections
>First of all, don't feel uncomfortable. You are not alone: Erections are a normal part of growing up
>Often, the erection happens at inappropriate times -- on the way home from school, at the swimming pool, or at the breakfast table.

TL;DR: Errections happen all the fucking time, for absolutely and totally arbitrary reasons. At times WAY more often than intentional ones

As a man in his late 20's who's actually been there, done that, and grown past it, stop telling young guys what the fuck to think about their erections--when you've never even had one and don't know the first thing.

That'd be like me telling a teenage girl that her having periods is fucking gross and she should feel disgusted about it and ashamed for not being able to control all the emotions she's going through or if I was outright chastising girls who are self conscious because of how easily their own period cycles are influenced by other women's, saying it's their fault, calling them weak and pathetic for being so easily affected

I wouldn't because I don't have the first fucking idea, I don't presume to understand, and as far as I know, it's not under their control anyway.

>>18189936
The context was a dude who got boners very frequently (that later admitted it was due to attraction).
I still stand firm, that you have more intentional boners than randoms. Otherwise an ugly chick like me would see more of them.
>>18189946
Well then they are never big enough to even make a bulge so enjoy your constant erection. Ive never once seen one in my whole life that wasnt from sex, and neither has anyone I've ever known. Ergo, if they really are happening all the damn time for no reason at all, why is this dude feeling weird about it? Probably because these average daily erections are not ragers. Maybe chubs at best. Easy to conceal and hide.
*also can't help but notice this is clearly for young kids, teens (adolescents) who will have this happen far more than say, your mid to late 20's who's, in your own words, grown past that phase.

Also woah, projection much? I said it was no big deal, you just don't need to scream at her BTW I HAVE A BONER RIGHT NOW.
Just like, you know, how girls aren't typically screaming to the world they're on their period? Most of us keep that shit discrete.
Nobody's calling anyone a pathetic loser mate, you're insecure and projecting that hard.

But be real, just like if a chick accidentally bled all over herself and you'd feel awkward even though you know its not her fault. We're gonna feel awkward knowing you have a boner, even if it's not your fault. It's just a weird situation, nothing you can do about it.

Anywho, should probably chill the fuck out mate. Not everyone is out to get ya you know? Only one making you feel bad is yourself.

>>18189922
>Am I wrong for thinking my bf is too passive because he didn't get mad when his autistic friend slapped my ass/flirted with me behind his back?

Have you talked to him about it?
About how you want HIM to stand up for you and how him not doing it bugs you and makes you feel undervalued?

The thing about relationship, if you don't ever speak up, it's hard to be understood.

Stop running on assumptions, because I bet he's got his own, and unless one of you speaks up, shits going to continue the way it is.

P.S. Since you're the one that's bugged, it's on you to bring it up.

>>18189886

You're over thinking the shit. Instead of making flowcharts, go fucking ask someone out. You don't know the first thing about if you'd work either way. That can only be learned through first hand experience.

Also that's some flaky as fuck friends if a "no" loses you a "close friend".

whats the least creepy/best way to ask to meet a girl
1. E-mail (she doesn't know I know her email but might not question it)
2. Facebook (I would need to make a fresh account just to add her)
3. Twitter (combination of 1 & 2)
I don't plan on asking her out through these just to meet irl so I can ask her then

>>18189962
My god, are you so ignorant you think your anecdotal evidence is worth more than the medical community's consensus?

You know why you don't see guy's boners all day? Because we cover it, hide it, cross our legs, use baggy pants etc... You are way out of your element

> those are just "chubs"

What a physiologically relevant definition.

>>18189962
>I still stand firm, that you have more intentional boners than randoms
>Well then they are never big enough to even make a bulge so enjoy your constant erection.
>all the other stuff where you mention erections

I will repeat:

How do you know that?
You are not a urologist, do not have a penis, and do not have teenage sons.

So stop making declarative statements like that with no factual, nor even anecdotal basis.

> Ive never once seen one in my whole life that wasnt from sex, and neither has anyone I've ever known.

That's because clothes are pretty good at hiding shit. doesn't mean it's not there or that it's not a raging hard on. This DOES happen.

Also quit with the "projection" shit. That's two different anon's you keep using that word with.

I don't give a damn about having boners, and long since learned to tuck it and not give a fuck in my teen years. I'm the same guy who told the other guy that not even OTHER GUYS notice this shit and he should just tuck and stop over thinking.

What I DO find annoying as heck is you keep talking like you know anything, and then just keep spouting misinformation to cover your own ass.

Stop.

Why do White girls always have the ugliest dogs?

>>18189963
I have spoken up about it and he just made excuses for the dude but tonight I'm gonna be more stern and tell him I'm not happy with how he doesn't seem to give a shit.

>>18189977
>I don't plan on asking her out through these just to meet irl so I can ask her then
So ask her out to ask her out?

>>18190008
I dont see her in person

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>>18189993
Then its clearly not a big deal if they're hideable so why is op so fucking concerned? kek.
You're just projecting louder now mate.
>>18189997
Seeing is believing, ugly chicks don't get boners. Hot chicks do.
Yall both projecting too and its pretty clear lol. Maybe you're just hiding your kink for fat ugly chicks or something idk

>>18190011
Does she know who you are? Maybe cyberstalk her to she if she'll bad an event you'd like near by and then meet her there. Would be best to purge them memory of doing that so it seems like you saw her for the first time and struck up a conversation.

I know nothing about women and they never love me just disclosing that.

>>18190012
And now you just kick the shitposting to eleven and retroactively claim you were just pretending to being retarded.

Or you are just so far up your ass that no amount of reason would persuade you. Either way, this ends the discussion

>>18190000
>I have spoken up about it and he just made excuses for the dude but tonight I'm gonna be more stern and tell him I'm not happy with how he doesn't seem to give a shit.

No.

I'm going to repeat:

Have you talked to him specifically NOT about how you're upset at his friend
His friend is his friend, fuck him, who gives a shit
What you're upset at HIM for not standing up for you.

You're not upset at his friend. You're upset at him.

Tell him that.

Tell him why.

Don't let him think this is purely his friend's fault, don't let him shift that blame, don't let him play mental gymnastics.

If you do, he will NEVER get it.

>>18190012
>Seeing is believing, ugly chicks don't get boners. Hot chicks do.

How would you know? Didn't you already call yourself an ugly chick?

>>18190024
Also, be less accusatory to start.
Putting someone on the defensive is NEVER a good way to start a conversation, and will further his tenancy to deflect.

My aggro just carried over from dealing with this other troll, so my bad with the wording.

If that doesn't work you can slam in the guilt hammer, but otherwise

Be patient, avoid emotion. Try to understand him as much as he understands you.

>>18190017
I sort of have been cyber stalking her but she doesn't really post anything to non-friends (or she posts nothing at all idk)
we had a class together the last semester and I'm pretty sure she was into me
Im probably going to hold out in hopes of seeing her for this one last week then just go with one of the above methods as a last resort, they just all seem to show that I was being a creepy internet stalker (which I obviously dont want her to think)

>>18190035
>they just all seem to show that I was being a creepy internet stalker (which I obviously dont want her to think)
Yeah well this is exactly what it is. Find another girl to think about before you really hurt yourself.

>>18190024
Ok... I get what you're saying, and yea I texted him earlier before I posted that I am put off by how passive he is and that I think he lets people off the hook too easily. Gonna talk more later tonight and I'll make sure he understands that its about him not standing up for me, and not about his friend.

>>18190031
I agree... he's super super defensive and its so hard to talk to him sometimes... but I'll try to be understanding and not accusatory.

What do you mean by guilt hammer?

>>18189537
He said she was really cute and would like to get to know her. Then asked for her number. She gave it to hi with a smile.

>>18189076
I guess you're right, I'm going to try tomorrow
Thanks for the motivation

>>18190143
She could just be that retarded and not know his intentions. Or she knows his intensions but is scared of rejecting people because of their boo hoo feelings.

Do girls ever act playful and tease guys they're definitely only friends with?

>>18189560
>>18190167
Thanks for your input. I think she was just trying to be polite, but the way she came off was confusing.

Girls, what kind of description and photos do you like seeing on Tinder profiles?

>>18190203
stuff about your large penis

>>18189390
>the most common thing to think when getting to know someone is that it's going to be a friendship

Not for guys if the girl is even remotely attractive.
do you get that?

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Are there any femanons right now?
Any opinion is good but femanons may know better.

If I only attract average or fat looking girls, does it mean that I'm unnatractive too?
I kind of know the answer already, I just want to know if girls tend to lower their standards when it comes to dating and if they are more courageous (about approaching or sending signs) when the guy doesn't seem hard to reach.

So far only ugly to average (in appearance) girls have gone far enough to hit on me in some way.
They seem to not be afraid to send me signs they like me.

But I never received this kind of attention from the cute ones.

Once I had a literal freak trying hard on me.
And it makes me feel bad about myself because in my head it means only one thing: I'm not the best looking guy around so they think they stand a chance with me.

Asking this also because it happened recently, some girl(not too bad looking) hit on me during class.

But despite her looks I really like her as a person, and I don't want to interact or date her based on her idea that I'm an easy or guaranteed date for her.

Girls

In what type of situation would you roll your eyes at at a guy?

I wanted to see what people thought about this.

My gf was finalizing a divorce when we got together. She lives decently far away until we move in together in December, but we still see each other pretty often.

Relationship has been perfect so far. No lying of any kind and we both seem to have fallen pretty hard for each other.

Out of nowhere today I got a message from some random guy telling me my gf is sleeping at her ex husbands house. I find this very unlikely. We video chat/talk everyday between the hours of 10-12. She has class in the mornings on weekdays and works early on weekends. She told me that her ex admitted to telling people they were still seeing each other in hope that we would break up and he can try to win her back.

As I said, I find this very unlikely as I am seeing her in her house through video chat till late hours of the night and she's gotta get up early every morning. I told her I believe her and trust her and we're doing okay but I am a little worried. I've been cheated on before and I just want to keep my guard up but this girl really seems like she's in love with me and we have had no problems so far.

>>18190304
It could be anything. Sometimes out of annoyance, sometimes out of love. It just depends on the situation.

>>18187403
If a woman gives you the opportunity to have sex with her but you're too shy to do anything to initiate, could she get offended?

>>18190022
Kek if you say so. You've got some good shitposts there.
>>18190024
Exactly. ugly chicks don't get boners. I'm an ugly chick, I would know lol.

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>>18190568
No matter how hideous you may look in life, I appreciate you answering my questions and making this corner of this website just a little more beautiful.

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>>18190600
No problem mate. Some people just wanna argue lol.

My boyfriend of 5 months visits his ex-girlfriends grave on occasion, and this is making me unhappy.

All I know about his ex-girlfriend is that they were really close and that he had even bought a ring to propose before she died suddenly in a rip tide when she went on holiday with her family. He was planning on taking her away somewhere shortly after and proposing.

This was 4 years ago, so I don't think it's okay that he visits his dead ex's grave. I'd understand if it was the first year, but 4 years, seriously? How do I tell him that I'm not okay with this? He does this a few times a year, and I need him to stop.

>>18190692
You can tell him, but I think it's something you just need to let be. A girl he wanted to marry died suddenly. Of course he's going to have very powerful emotions about it, even years later.

>>18190064
>What do you mean by guilt hammer?

Responding late (was out) I think you guys need to have a real and honest conversation.

I'm not sure you know how he actually feels and thinks, and I'm not sure he does you. Or maybe neither of you can go there yet ( it does take a certain level of mental maturity that's rare when you're younger--and that's perfectly reasonable because that kind of shit can change almost day by day when you're younger, so keeping in tune would be exhausting a pointless)

I'm not sure you understand the reasons WHY he's not sticking up for you and I'm not sure HE understand WHY it is that you want him to stand up for you.

You need to approach this from a place of genuinely trying to understand one another, of not placing blame, of not making it anyone's fault.

At this point it's not necessarily anyone's fault, this is a misunderstanding. This is you two not understanding one another. Work to resolve that and get why the other thinks the way they do.

If he's not willing to do that then go ahead and try and pressure him (because there are cases where it takes shock cases--an "oh shit, she's threatening to leave me" level shock for people to turn around) but you should realize that this is an absolute last ditch effort because most of the time, these kind of guilt/shock tactics are temporary and don't really change anything in the long run.

The real changes come from when someone gets where you're coming from, and WANTS to change to match it, and you want to change for them too (so that it feels reciprocated).

Of course--being real here--the possibility exists he's just a chickenshit and it's up to you with what you want to do with that.

>>18190568
> I'm an ugly chick, I would know lol.

Biiitch. You already said you've never seen a guy pop a boner, and neither have your friends. So when the fuck have you seen a guy pop a boner because of a hot chick?

Get the fuck out of here with that shit.

P.S. I'm drunk.

>>18190702
Yeah but it seems stupid to still be like this after 4 years. It's like when you break up with someone, you need to move on. I know he didn't break up with her, but she's still an ex and he needs to move past her.

It makes me feel jealous. They were together since secondary school, and we're in our mid twenties. I even asked if he still loved her, and he told me that he didn't want to talk about her. Wtf? Isn't this almost like cheating? He didn't answer me, so that must mean he still does have feelings for her. I mean I'd be happy if he stopped visiting her grave. He said he only does it a few times a year, but still he shouldn't be doing that at all at this point.

>>18190714

Iit was his ex fiance. Someone he was planning to spend his life with. On top of that someone he knew since childhood. Of course he's still visiting her.

But yo... She's literally dead.

If she even exists, she's in another fucking life/celestial plane/whatever the fuck you believe in.

Why the fuck are you feeling jealous of someone who is literally the most inaccessible that can possibly be.

You may as well be jealous of Jesus Christ/God/Allah/whatever for all the sense that makes.

If you can't deal with this. Bail. Because what he's doing is actually reasonable. It sucks, but if you can't understand, you don't really have the right to knock him for it.

If you want to talk to him and try to make your feelings known, that's your prerogative, but you don't have the right to make demands.

Hard truth, it's the same shit with anyone who decides to try to be with a widow/widower, they gotta understand what the fuck they're getting in to. If you're not prepared to do that, then don't