Thread replies: 10
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2
File: 1330110895546.png (12KB, 343x386px) Image search:
[Google]
12KB, 343x386px
So I was on okcupid and ended up chatting with a girl who said she was single, but non-monogamous. I was curious about some non-monogamy, but it was really just curiosity at best. Anyway she was pretty fun, conversation flowed easily, etc. I really enjoyed her company. After we hang out a few times, it comes out that she has a boyfriend, but he's leaving for the military in a few months and their relationship essentially has an expiration date. I wasn't wild about the situation, but I agreed to go along with it because she was the first person I thought there was potential with after doing the single thing for a few years.
Fast forward to now, about a month and a half later. I'd told her it would be nice to date someone who wasn't a teetotaler like my last gf, and would at least drink and go out and do stuff with me. She said she didn't really drink anymore, but would do it with me if we just drank at home and skipped the bar scene. That's fine with me, I'm pretty easygoing. However both weekends this was supposed to happen, she's backed out for various reasons. This is after making a semi-big deal about how she struggles with drinking anymore. I'm not really upset about that, but then for some reason she's sent me texts (on two different occasions) telling me about how she's having a great time getting drunk with other people.
This seems pretty crappy to me. I'm not upset about her not wanting to get drunk with me, but after it became this twice-missed out on thing, then her telling me she's out getting twisted with other people just seems kind of disrespectful, and like she doesn't really care about how that information would seem like to me. Honestly I think she should have just said nothing to me, because volunteering that information just seems like a blatant disregard for my feelings, and would only be useful if you're trying to make me feel unimportant.
>>
>>18180307
Nice blog
>>
Honestly, I'm just not sure how I'm supposed to feel at this point. Where before I was ambivalent about seeing how things went, now I'm just downright apathetic. Not to mention that I'm spending most of my free time with her, that I could better be using dating other girls. I'm not in a position where I don't get dates, so this seems like a spot where I'm just poorly using my resources to get what I want (a girlfriend).
I'm just curious what you other anons position on this is?
>>
>>18180312
sorry bro, my blog post got too long before I could ask my question. Hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me
>>
File: weeks_in_your_life.jpg (3MB, 2550x3300px) Image search:
[Google]
3MB, 2550x3300px
>>18180314
Let that sink in
>>
>>18180354
That's kind of my thought at well, anon. I'm not getting any younger and this doesn't seem like what I want, nor a good use of my time. Thanks for taking the time to read my post(s)
>>
selfish girl is selfish
>>
>>18180317
You're forgiven, I'll actually reply.
I'm of the opinion that you have to just either cut your losses or determine how much time you actually want to spend with someone. This particular girl sounds like my roommate's "girlfriend," and a lot of other girls I've run into in my time, someone who just doesn't really know what they want, or just isn't that interested in anyone but themselves. Which is fine, don't get me wrong - if you're that kind of person too. But they manipulate and hurt and don't really give a shit that they do it.
I'd find someone else.
>>
>>18180417
Thanks, bro. I kind of feel the same way. Do I owe this person an explanation? Should I just ghost her? That's kind of the point I'm at, where I need to determine how to disengage myself from the situation
>>
>>18180447
Well, there's two approaches here - but odds are, either approach with this kind of girl is going to make her act like you're being clingy and some kind of problem and "not chill," which is bullshit... BUT...
You can either be upfront and honest, and say "hey, I like hanging out with you, but it sucks that you're going and doing the stuff you say we were going to specially plan to do after you've canceled our plans, so let's talk about that and fix it," or you can just kind of slowly fade away and hit her up less, and IF she hits you up and wonders where you've been, explain why.
If she hits you up, it means she actually gives a shit about you, but she may get mad at you for being passive aggressive with #2.
Thread posts: 10
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2