Is it a bad idea to tell a girl she makes you nervous? I'm

Not at all. Tell her, she'll probably feel more comfortable around you because you would be being so real. It's totally flattering.

>>18172983

Sounds good. I should have done that when a crush i had once came over to watch movies. I actually was pretty confident with her on the first date, because she was really talkative and warm towards me. Second date she came over, i had spent the entire day cleaning every nook and cranny of the house to make everything perfect, but when she got there i was a fucking nervous wreck, and REALLY put her off. Maybe if i had just admitted it we could have laughed it off and it would have been smooth sailing from there.

Anyways, i failed speech class 4 times, that's how severe my anxiety is.

>>18172976
I've told a girl she makes me nervous as fuck before she smiled and blushed a bit and the we went back to normal conversation, really just depends on how you go about it. For me it was in passing while we were hanging out, I had a gf so couldbt really push it forward.

I've also always been very blunt about people

>>18173012

She didn't ask why? What if they ask why? Should i just say "you're a very attractive woman, that's all i can say"?

>>18173054
Unless the girl is a complete idiot she won't ask why, or unless she's fishing for compliments

Yeah, I think it's fine to tell her. But just say you're a bit nervous. No more

>>18172976

I like shy guys. I think it's super cute when their face gets all red. I get shy too so it makes me feel more comfortable around them.

If she's even meeting up with you at all, especially off of tinder, she's into you, and telling her you're a little nervous won't make her change her mind about you.

>>18172976
Depends on the girl. Most girls probably would be somewhat turned off. Other girls might find it endearing.

>>18173099

I feel like it's something i should probably get off my chest.

>>18173106
Unfortunately girls hate when guys are open about their feelings, I'd say keep it to yourself

>>18173116

Dammit

>>18173142

You could text her something causal like "do you ever get that anxious feeling before meeting up the first time?" Or something.

Insecure guys are the equivalent of fat girls. It's damn hard to be attracted to either.

>>18173176

Fuck everything then. It takes guts to admit something you don't want to admit, it takes guts to step out of your comfort zone like i've been doing.

Guts> stupid arrogant confidence. I would out-survive chad in a deathly situation because i'm bold enough to do what scares me. Chad would pretend he's got it covered and wind up dead.

I thought life was survival of the fittest.

>>18173176

And it's not a matter of being insecure, it's anxiety. I know i'm cool and can get girls, but i'm just a nervous person with a lot of adrenaline and a resting heart rate that's probably higher than yours. I'm uneasy around all strangers.

>>18173208

If you are insecure talking to fucking girls how the fuck would you ever be able to protect her from greater dangers. Since you brought up survival of the fittest and all.

File: 1486567803118.jpg (151KB, 855x655px) Image search: [Google]

151KB, 855x655px

would you feel excited and fun when a girl is nervous at the sight of you?
yea sure its humbling but if your an attractive girl shit happens ALL THE TIME
it gets boring
they want someone different like any person would.
think like you would because men and women are the same in most ways except women have power with their looks and shit

>>18173252

It's not about being nervous just because they're pretty, but more so because you like them a lot and you don't want to screw it up. In my case, it was "alright, i got this qt to like me, the first date went awesome, now this is the one that counts and holy fuck am i nervous."

Or idk. I guess i'll just keep trying to hide it and keep failing until someone finally isn't turned off by my behavior.

>>18173286
It really depends on the girl, dude. I hate it when people try to give universal answers to specific questions, which happens a LOT on here.

It also depends on how you say it. A cute, witty guy who admits "You make me nervous" but maybe turns it into a funny joke and still manages to be charming? She probably won't be put off. A guy who, you know, comes across as NERVOUS, not just date-nervous ... it's more likely she will be put off.

>>18172976
Depends on if you can pull it off with actual sincerity, depends on how you do it, and depends on what kind of person she is.

I feel like a better statement would be, "To be honest, I'm pretty nervous about this whole thing/right now/etc" is better than "you make me nervous" if only because it's doesn't sound as personal/accusatory.

It's an intimate and sincere admission, without being as leading.

Genuine sincerity and honesty is a novelty in dating that a lot of people don't seem to get nowadays. It can definitely work to your advantage, as long as you can channel it and stay true to who you are.

I say this as a guy, who where basically my main attractive quality has been: I come off as incredibly sincere. aaand in fact... it's actually to the degree where at some point while I was starting to date, I had to learn to tone it down because it would actually get me in situations that I never intended (I.E. hurting people over a mismatch of feelings... which sucks... especially because I've known what the other end of that feels like).


As more advice:

As a former socially anxious(nigh phobic) individual who became gregarious through years of hard effort, you may need to just deal with your general social anxiety first.

The way I did it was just to slowly escalate my encounters bit by bit and kept pushing myself to do things I'm not comfortable with.

I started making myself to ask questions in class
Start talking to teachers
Speak to class mates.
Go to parties with friends
Introduce myself to strangers at them
Start conversations at them.
Start going to restaurants after work and sit at the bar for a meal
Start conversations with bartenders
Start conversations with whoever the heck was around me

Bit by bit i'd ramp up. Over and over. Specifically because it terrified me.

After a few years I realized I could now talk to anyone, anywhere, regardless of age, gender, or if I found them attractive.

>>18173307

Best advice here. Thanks anon. I do some of what you listed and it makes me more confident. If i keep going to bars and parties, eventually i end up getting some, but it's not the same as a date. There's alcohol involved when i go out for social outings. It makes things easier.

Who is this girl in the image? Got my diamond pretty hard desu

>>18172976
only if you don't seem nervous.

if you actually seem nervous, it's like telling someone you just pissed yourself when you've been pissing directly on them the whole conversation.

sperggg

>>18172976

If your nervous, you could mention it. See how she reacts. I've done it before on a netflix and chill date and the grill was endeared by it. She might have been an outlier though. Just see what happens.

>>18172976
She's not making you nervous. You are making you nervous. Don't start off with an erroneous statement.

I would be really turned off by that. Social awkwardness isn't quirky or endearing to me. If we flow well, it'll feel natural.