Hello everyone. Been in a relationship for a long ass time,

>>18170481
Because of the pressures of society to get married.
Its traditional.
Its something we have been doing for a very long time.

Don't let it get to you. If you are happy with the way things are, don't get married.

I feel the same way as you anon.

marriage can be helpful in a legal sense for division of assets, next of kin etc but most of those things can be arranged without marriage

>>18170481
In America you get extra benefits if you're married.

>>18170495
We wouldn't b subject to the financial benefits, since it'd still be in our interest to file taxes separately. The inheritance & stuff at least right now doesn't pertain to us, and we don't have kids.

>>18170503
Then don't get married. What's the problem here? You don't want to, you see no reason, so don't. End of thread. Fuck what other people want you to do or think you should do with your relationship. Stop giving a fuck what others think. Your life will improve.

>>18170509
I'm asking because I'm wondering why everyone else seems to think my situation isn't 'valid' unless I'm wearing a ring. Why do others seem to think it's so important?

We're not going to get hitched, likely ever. But even though we've been together for 7 years, people still act like it's a short term thing unless we get married.

>>18170481
>Why is it so important?
It's not, unless you make it so. Some people like tradition, some don't. If I didn't receive benefits and decent health insurance, I wouldn't have married my partner (it was essentially a courthouse wedding). A piece of paper does not make someone more committed to you, it just makes separating expensive.

>>18170512
>Why do others seem to think it's so important?
If you're talking about friends/family, it's likely because they're more traditional and aren't as practical when it comes to relationships.

>>18170512
Because it's an old out dated way of thinking. It's nothing wrong with not getting married. Unless like I stated earlier you can financially benefit from it. If you two love each other and both agree you don't need to get married than just continue living and being happy as is.

Being a husband is very different to being a boyfriend. At least for me it changed for the better. I'm not religious at all and neither is my wife but she likes the whole marriage stance so I took the plunge for love and romance.
Being married is just more respected in society because that's the way it is. It's like a fat person claiming they're in optimal health and you don't quite believe them because fat automatically and usually means unhealthy. Same with marriage. Marriage = committed and in for the long haul. Boyfriend/girlfriend = bouncing out when ya want.

>>18170532
>Marriage = committed and in for the long haul. Boyfriend/girlfriend = bouncing out when ya want.
You can do the same thing when married. Nothing actually changes.

>>18170533
Something for us did. Not for everyone but it did for us.

>>18170533
I think what anon was getting at is that society's perception is that marriage = top commitment, and society values commitment in a huge way. It's why we have stupid bullshit like employers tossing out resumes of people who stayed at a company less than two years, regardless of their qualifications. There's arbitrary commitment judgments thrown around all the time, in all aspects of life. Right or wrong, logical or not, that's just the way it is.

>>18170543
So you're somehow more committed because of a piece of paper, not because you're two decent people that genuinely like each other and want to make each other happy? Not trying to be a dick, but I don't understand what changed within the relationship. Can you explain it a bit more?

>>18170557
>>18170543
You see, for us I suspect it'd work the opposite way, which is why we're not going to do it. Both of us are the kind of people who really don't like the idea of being stuck in a situation, or for there to be something that forces our hand.

With out marriage, we made a choice every day to stick together. We each individually make enough money such that we really don't need the other, and we'd be fine on our own, but we choose to be together because we like each other.

>>18170557
its what you declare when you get married
if you have any sort of self respect you gona try your best to make it work because you gave your word
loads of ppl make an ass of their mouth when getting married because sure as hell they dont mean it

Marriage in a traditional sense it's the irreversible gift of yourself to your spouse, you basically are supposed to stop existing as an individual entity.

In our contemporary pagan society is just a contract, no different from a internet subcription.

>>18170576
Honestly, this is a good call! My husband wanted to get married (and his family is pretty traditional, so it would have been awkward in their eyes to keep living together and not get married) but I had a hard time with the idea, as I think it's outdated. Now that I'm married, I feel trapped. I think it makes more sense as a step you take when you decide to raise children together, rather than as a commitment to a love partner. Especially since now that we're married everyone pesters us about when we're having kids. Not yet, jeez!!!