In some hours, I'm having a differential calculus exam,

File: 1391557219207.jpg (56KB, 597x519px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 597x519px

In some hours, I'm having a differential calculus exam, I haven't studied since I got back to university a month and a half ago.

I feel like shit, actually I don't even how I feel, I don't fee anything, I know I need to study but I can't find the motivation to do it, or in fact to do anything.

I enjoyed lifting, I lifted religiously for 3 years before going to university, after that I felt I couldn't do it anymore, I didn't have enough time or energy to do it, eventually I got fat.

I stopped talking to my old friends and hanging out with them some months ago, they've messaged me but I do not respond. I don't have any social media besides my phone, I've never liked it. I haven't got out in months, not even to university parties. Last weekend I got invited to one, but I refused, I don't know why.

I think I have become insecure in the past years. I always tried to be strong, not only physically but mentally as well, I used to be very confident in my abilities, however nowadays I feel like a bitch because I'm not doing the things I know I can do and what I need to do to succeed. I don't want to disappoint my mum and my grandma, they are the only family I have.

For the past days I have been thinking about taking a semester off but I also feel anxious about it because I'm 23 and I'll probably finish my degree in 2.5 years because I fucked up, while all my old friends are already finishing theirs.

I don't know what to do, how to get my life back on track again, how to get out of this.