I've been recording this damn script over and over again,

>>18114039
Biggest mistake ever is to read from a script. Unscripted is always funnier. Cut the script and read from the heart

>>18114047
I stutter, though. I use words incorrectly. I stop saying a word partway through and say a different word. I'm not good at putting sentences together on-the-fly.

stop judging yourself so harshly and post the immediate next take you do.

>>18114320
But if I make a total fool of myself, people might decide they want to mess with me. I have to come off as semi-competent just to not get harassed.

>>18114333
So don't use the script. Get the main ideas down and then just do it based off of memory. It always sounds more natural that way, and if you have a hard time remembering just use key points to remind yourself rather than a script.

>>18114362
That's not a bad idea. I think I'll try that! Thanks!

>>18114039
do you have a recording to show us anon? Don't worry, I'll just give you constructive criticism

>>18114521
Sure, just give me a few minutes to put all the fragments I recorded into the proper order.

>>18114521
>>18114588
Okay, so here's the first two minutes. There's some visual stuff that doesn't make sense in audio form, I think you can still judge my speaking ability.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0LXYtcN22U8

>>18114633
You really sound fine. If I was just watching the video without knowing about your struggles beforehand I wouldn't have thought of anything.

Now that you've been pointing out how you feel it's inauthentic, it's perhaps because you sound rather neutral. Not all that emotionally engaged. By no means I'm suggesting you to scream and go full blown, but maybe keep in mind why exactly you want to tell the audience what, and what motivates you to make those reviews. Or act like you're telling this to a friend. Be passionate!

The first sentence about the Lego movie is good in that point, but later on about the Spongebob movie you sound a little bit like the narration of some neutral news documentary.

>>18114633
You've somehow managed to sound expressive and robotic at the same time. I don't even understand how such a thing is possible, but you've managed it nonetheless.

>>18114664
>Now that you've been pointing out how you feel it's inauthentic, it's perhaps because you sound rather neutral. Not all that emotionally engaged. By no means I'm suggesting you to scream and go full blown, but maybe keep in mind why exactly you want to tell the audience what, and what motivates you to make those reviews. Or act like you're telling this to a friend. Be passionate!
I was trying to show that I care about SpongeBob without invoking a "haha, look at this grown man getting so invested in children's cartoons" reactions. I guess I can't have it both ways, though.

Unless.. maybe the key isn't seeming almost indifferent, but rather, not seeming angry. The main point of contention people have with Mr. Enter (a guy who literally does what I'm trying to do for a living) is that he gets really angry at the stuff he's reviewing and acts like the people behind it have done some crime. My reaction to SpongeBob 2 was basically "man, there was so much talent involved in this, I just wish they turned out a better product."

Thank you so much for this advice! I will definitely try to show my passion when I record again tomorrow! (I can't do it right now because I might wake up a family member.)

>>18114688
Kek.

>>18114717
Try looking up ProJared's game reviews. He's a guy who can critique something while still remaining level-headed. He has a, for lack of a better word, "wholesomeness" to him, even when he's disappointed in something. Things matter, they just don't make him flip out.

Maybe watch a video or two or his and see how he pulls it off.

>>18114722
This guy's great. He's not really funny, but that sort of thing is just flavoring. I watched his Tamagotchi video and now I feel like I've actually played the game.

I'm surprised at how much helpful stuff I'm getting out of this thread. You guys are great!

>>18114633
Some parts do sound a bit scripted, and I know that it is, but if you're trying to go for the "non-scripted" sound, then you have to work on the spacing and time of the words. I would say to record lots of takes, close your eyes and listen to them back over again as though you're a viewer. Take what sounds good and bad and separate them. Obviously toss the bad parts out and work on improving them to sound like the good parts. Also people like emotion in what they are listening too. In some parts you have a range of lowering and raising your voice to emphasize important parts and in others it's very clear you're taking your time reading a script.

Nevertheless, you could use the advice of someone above and make key notes of what you wanted to talk about like "the title", "this specific part", and start talking about it in free form with no restrictions.

Imagine sitting around a table with a couple buddies, maybe a drink or two in you if you're into that, and let it all out naturally.

>>18114039
And don't think of making a public speech. Imagine the camera is a friend of yours and talk quietly one-to-one.

>>18114722
Integrity's a better word, but yes, precisely this.