So I stopped jerking off, got /fit/ and got a decent job. Then

congrats you are a fuckin asshole you don't deserve better

Same problem here op. Not being a sociopath is hard sometimes. I think we both know what we have to do...

>>18109935

how am I an asshole? do I have to marry the first girl I date?

>>18109945

aye

Why the hell would you break up with her? She sounds perfect. Trust me, you don't find girls like this everyday

>>18109932
>starter gf
The fuck dude

I had the grand total of 2 sexual partners before I got married at 19. I slept with one of them only the once and the other two times. I got divorced after 4 years and I was like "here we go, after missing out in my youth it is time to experience the joy of random sex".

I had sex with 2 more people, both one time only because it was random encounters before I met a third person who I started having sex with a lot within my first year single.

All the time I was thinking this is not the kind of person I usually go for. They were chubby, kind, intelligent, kind of awkward, a second year university student. After only a short time and a two unsuccessful and gross attempts at hooking up with other people in a row I started seeing this person at least once a week.

Bunch of good sex. Nice food. Taken care of. Really liked me. Like REALLY liked me. I could never really get over the fact that I was going to have to dump them because I could not see myself being with them in the long run at all and I wasn't looking for another relationship.

My ex was much more successful socially, financially and conventionally much more attractive. I imagined I would eventually be looking for a relationship which would have been an upgrade from my ex. This went on for almost a year. I wasn't sure how to break it off without devastating this person and also losing somebody who was gradually becoming important to me. Eventually I thought fuck it, maybe I better just tell them what they want to hear, that I loved them and get on with actually being in a proper declared relationship.

It wasn't that this person was unattractive. It is just my ex was the kind of person who everybody liked, everybody though yeah they are attractive, they were popular and sociable and conventionally 'cool'. They were an easy person to be with. This new person had about 3 friends, all bookish intellectual types, they dressed like they'd just sort of stopped being a teenage goth and were buying a few new clothes.

>>18109932
The grass isn't always greener on the other side, OP. New girl might be cuter but she could also be crazy. Finding a girl who isn't 100% batshit insane is hard enough as it is. You're with one whose only issues are being clingy and shy. Cherish that dammit.

>>18109965
Nice blog post, was there a point to it?

>>18109967
this

take a step back and think about potential consequences

>>18109932
Breaking up with a sane, decent looking girl that you get along well with and who treats you well for no reason probably isn't a good idea. Good partners (of both genders, as evidenced by you being a tool) are not easy to find.

Breaking up does sound like the best idea though. Your best bet would be to make her want to dump you. If you don't want to cause her any pain, you could just try to start doing things that she dislikes but that don't really harm her. Maybe discuss politics and express drastically different views.

>>18109972
Well shit, the OP didn't exactly even pose a question, just rambling about wanting to upgrade, but not wanting to hurt this girls feelings.

You could try and find some action on the side and then break up with her once you've managed to secure somebody else though you are going to wreak her and risk being labelled an asshole. You could break up with her and try and find somebody else though they might be worse in so many terrible ways and you might never find somebody else ever or as good again, but you don't know unless you try. You could stay with her and eventually come to accept your choice as a mature one putting long term stability and suitability of personality over being crazy and fucking you up.

Like I'm 34 and I hold the opinion that all women, even the good ones are snakes with tits who will eventually fuck you over if you let them and the battle between the sexes is constant and ongoing and brings spice to life. If you don't like it, don't play along and just opt out when you are done.

Looks change/fade/become irritating in a long term relationship. The ability to be kind and thoughtful and caring is actually quite important to me in comparison to being completely hot and completely crazy.

Like this topic has been talked to death, but basically if you are very good looking and in your sexual prime, there is no benefit to maintaining a fair, honest relationship opposed to enjoying your life and seeing what doors will open for you. Women understand this, men tend to not like it because typically they invest most of the resources in trying to bring about a relationship.

>>18109932
Some people deserve to suffer

>>18109945
>>"Not being a sociopath"
I don't think you know what a sociopath is

>>18109955
No, but it's wrong to use someone

File: 2347c9482521c09401cf4fe66e97f9ec72f6d9df6acd141b69b90a87006bf761_1.jpg (28KB, 548x306px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 548x306px

>>18110001
>all women are snakes, even the good ones

thanks for the tip

>>18110012
I believe that relationships have this window where they are useful which is typically where you combine resources for the purposes of attempting to establish a home within which to raise a family.

After that is done however, you've got what exactly? Companionship? Regular sex? What about when hormones start to fade and sex isn't that interesting to you any more? Most of it is driven by the desire to create children.

Most people who start families end up very different by the time the children leave home. This is when relationships are more cohabiting friendships where people stay together out of convenience or company. Or they break up and they get half your pension.

>>18110025
>so you make a family together
>Then what, companionship? Regular sex?
>someone to keep you company as you grow old and die? sharing memories and experiences together?

sounds comfy, desu
The older I get the less I care about male friends and the more I enjoy doing things with my gf, just the two of us.

> What about when hormones start to fade and sex isn't that interesting to you any more?

good thing there's more to life than sex, and having someone to share it with is great. Plus there's always testosterone replacement therapy, viagra, and girls can get estrogen therapy too...so even when you're in your 60s, 70s, 80s+ you can still have some decent old people sex. Might even be good if you are relatively healthy and fit.

File: abuuse.jpg (30KB, 512x512px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 512x512px

>>18110012
>being so desperate that your only alternative to cucking yourself is haumosexing

I suggest less TV watching anon

I'm married and still feel like upgrading every day

Try poly

>>18109964
>starter gf
Practice gf, whatever you want to call it. Didn't you have one?

This is interesting.
For me it is a bit different.
I see myself as a huge loser, an eternal underdog who bit onto something I actually started to like and got some kind of mental and physical rigor mortise.
You see, I catched up on academic qualifications so I could study.
Started it with no idea about it with 23 and sucked so hard I became a mental husk for literally 2 to 3 years
I think having been an apathetic mess before but still having the "rest of power" left, it kind of gave me the rest to force me to acknowledge that I might have a problem that slowly grew in me like mold grows in bread.
I started visiting the shrink and got meds, which helped and still helps along my chosen rocky road.
I never had a gf in my 27 years, the reason being that I think that I just can't open myself to another soul completely.
Yet I think calling your gf a "starter pokemon" is not nice.
What are you even looking for in a relationship?
If you just want to fuck, there are escorts and prostitutes, you do not seem to lack money.
And she seems to like you a lot,
if it isn't an act.
Why did you even look for a relationship anyways?
Please, I am not judging you.
I am also just a horny guy, but I am asking because it might be the question you might have waiting for.

>>18109955
>how am I an asshole? do I have to marry the first girl I date?

You went into it knowing you were just going to use her. The only way that is even remotely ok is if you are up front about what you're doing and the other person is honestly fine with that (which means not sitting there hoping that you change your mind).

You're still using her and still not being honest about it.

You have no integrity. You're avoiding having a conversation with her about what's going on because you're afraid it's going to be unpleasant. You don't really care about her happiness or feelings beyond not having them be an inconvenience to you. Oh no, she might feel bad or upset and you'll have a guilty conscience. So instead of letting her know that you're a piece of shit who used her, you're there dithering what to do because you want to know what sort of lie you can tell her that gets her out of your life while also getting you off the hook from her knowing you're a piece of trash. Or more likely, you don't want anyone else -- like the new girl you're interested in -- finding out.

The way to stop being a piece of shit is to be honest, accept the consequences of your behavior, try to put right what you did wrong (if possible), and try to be better in the future.

Your girlfriend might be angry and upset with you. Her opinion of you might drop like a rock. Well, that's probably as it should be. But she also won't be wasting more time in a relationship that's a dead end, and she'll be free to go find someone who actually cares about her.

>>18110064
Nope, married the literal first girl. Was going to be First and Last, real romantic.

Was.

>>18110115
I want to date OP's gf. She sounds really cute and nice.

>>18109932
Those tits aren't big. Post your real gf, OP

>>18109932
Just do it as soon as possible if
1 - you're sure/zero doubts
2 - okay with the possibility of not getting the one your upgrading to. Who knows you can upgrade with a different chick

But as for right now, if you believe #1 was practice and that practice is over, any time you're both being together for is wasted. Time is the most valuable thing in life so just hurry and make a decision

Post contact info. I want to be her rebound man, OP!

>>18109932
>>>18108806
Not OP, >>18108445 here, I agree with you on the shittalking part. It says more about the OP than it does him. Its like by shittalking him she's reducing her responsibility of her wanting to leave him. I was a lot like the guy she's posting about, and all I ever needed was a push. Instead I was humiliated, shittalked, and treated like a dog and it took me years to finally get my shit together and become well adjusted to this stuff. I was changed through a negative experience. Still, I wish she was more forgiving and understanding and helped give me a push. I think that would have given me a positive experience to grow from. Ah well, shouldnt dwell on the past
Kids don't understand what it means to love someone. Oh well, break up with her OP and you'll find out. Besides she deserves better.

>>18110229
Ah fuck misspost

Anyways break up op

>>18110064
>starter gf
It's a meme bro. You might have autism.

>>18109932
For your sake, I sincerely hope this is nothing more than a bait thread.

>>18110115
This. This is what a real man should do OP.
Listen to this wise anon

Always knew slugposters were shit human beings

>>18110053
that's depressing

>>18110281
It's not even like I can find anyone worth upgrading to, just horizontal trades

If she's nice just convince her having 2 gfs will be great.

What does not jerking off actually do? Do you suddenly acquire social skills? I mean I'm not socially retarded or anything, I have male and female friends but when it comes to flirting I have 0 skills.
How does not beating my meat help with that? I don't get it.

>>18109932
>starter girlfriend
>starts relationship with full intention of ending it
Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?

>>18110115
>>18110115
>>18110115
This anon speaks truth.

Thats pretty harsh m8.

Don't listen to these cucks, keep doing what you're doing.
And you don't necessarily have to break up with your gf when you can have 2 girls at the same time. Or at least wait until you fuck the other girl.

>>18109932
You gotta break it off. If she is as good to you as you say she is you should be good to her and let her go before you waste anymore of her time.

>>18110146
You're in the extreme minority.

>>18109932

>got a starter gf
>now i want an upgrade

treat girls like a product and you're going to hate yourself.

Not really sure where all the hate is coming from.

Do you all seriously only initiate a romantic relationship with someone only if you think they're "the one" material or something? Seems totally reasonable to me to just want a girlfriend rather than always being looking for a life partner, especially if you're like OP and have limited relationship experience. He wouldn't even be able to make an informed opinion about what he wants/needs in a lifelong partner at that point anyway.

It's a little harsh to call her a starter, but if you knew this relationship had a time limit for you, that's fine. In the future, I would make it clearer upfront that you're looking to date a bit more casually. You don't tell someone "Just so you know, I'd date/fuck you but you'll never be wifey material" or anything like that, but you can definitely let it be known that you're "looking to date and see where it goes" or something like that. That is dating code for "I may pull the plug on this thing. Fair warning." Knowing that, most people who are at all marriage-minded will be looking to have a conversation about the state/future of the relationship within a year if they've developed strong feelings for you, and THEN the only responsible thing to do is not waste their time if you're still just not feeling it.

>>18109932
I don't think you're an asshole.

I think you are probably taking for granted how important this girls affection is to you. I've made the same mistake before.

What's probably going to happen is you're going to dump her and go on to date a few 8/10s -- maybe even a 9 -- that are total pain-in-the-ass unfaithful whores before you realize what you squandered. If you're lucky and don't get trapped, then you'll try to go back to the devoted 6 or 7/10s only to find that they've all been wifed.

>>18110905
>Not really sure where all the hate is coming from
It's probably because he's more or less saying she's too ugly or something to make into a life partner and he's just using her for sex and validation.

Imagine being with a girl for years only to find out she was using you to get experience before upgrading to Chad. Nah, seriously, there's an entire subreddit dedicated to talking about bitches and whores. They call it the Red Pill.

>>18109932
>FUKN KEK

WELCOME TO LIFE YOU AUTISTIC KEK, people upgrade all the time, you act like you're in a moral dilemma, but EVERYONE does this. Stop being a bitch and fuck both or dump the girl that doesn't excite you anymore.

>>18109945
Anyone that refers to themselves as a sociopath is a full on fedora tipper.

kinda related

>want to find a gf
>I'm in a master's program so I'm gonna be gone in a year, maybe a year and a half tops before I go to another school for a PhD

I know not all relationships last that long but it makes me a little uneasy because I want to find something longterm.

>>18109932
>starter gf
Wow, you suck

Dude, you fucking cunt, are you literally referring to ditching this girl and getting a cuter one as an upgrade?

Fuck off. Don't deserve shit. Best advice I could give.

>>18111834
This.

>>18109932

Look, other people can't make your life choices for you. You've laid out the issues and you have to make the call.

All I will say is that you don't need "cause" to end a relationship, and your happiness matters at least as much as hers. It is not a kindness to stay with her because she'd be sad if you broke up.

>>18109932
You are going to regret it. I almost guarantee it. Devotion is easy to take for granted, but it is hard to come by someone who is truly devoted to you. It isn't something a wise man would squander.

>>18109962
This. Bro the grass is almosr never greener.

>>18109955
if you had not used the word "starter gf" and "upgrade" I might feel bad for you. But you didn't, so fuck you and I hope you die alone.

>>18109932
what kind of scum are you to break up with your girlfriend for someone who is cuter. she legit cooks for you. OPEN YOUR EYES.

>>18110053
i heard louis ck make a joke about how when you have kids you ask your self i should have just divorced.

>>18109967
This