I need help with a complicated potential relationship... Or maybe

Do you actually think you're going to have a relationship with her...?

Getting in a real genuine relationship with her might be tough if you can't even get clear answers from her. I have a gut feeling there isn't going to be too much of anything substantial from this girl.

It's possible a relationship with a girl who has another guy could work but that doesn't mean this specific case of it will

>>18091255
I'm not sure, but I think there's potential. She told me she "doesn't just hook up with random guys, etc." That I'm the only guy she's gone on a date with from the gym. She seems to really like me, she thinks I'm intelligent and very mature for my age... Things just aren't clear, and it's driving me nuts. All my past relationships didn't start like this, there was always clear signs they wanted to be with me and make it serious.

Point is. I would if she'd tell me what's up. But it seems she doesn't even know herself what she wants

>>18091260
*sigh* I really just don't want to be wasting my time with her. But there's so much that shows me she thinks about me, at least a little. She works at the gym I go to, and one day gave me a roll of film because she found out I use a film camera. She also sent me a few IG accounts to follow etc.

To make things more complicated she says things like "I'm not sure about my current relationship (w/ guy far away), it's changed a lot due to the distance..."

>>18091276
>I think there's potential
She straight up told you she has a boyfriend and she's in an open relationship with him. She has told you the deal, I don't know why you think she's being evasive or confusing.

>>18091311
No she never said open or not. She said "I'm allowed to see other people."
Okay, how many? Polyamory is a legitimate thing people do. It essentially means they you're in a *closed* relationship with multiple people. Open on the other hand means it's a fuck for all and I don't want that. I deliberately asked her which one she's a part of and she did not give a clear answer.

But I understand what you're saying. I am probably just a fuck for her.

>>18091321
>She said "I'm allowed to see other people."
Any reasonable person would understand that means it's an open relationship.

And even if it wasn't, would you be willing to be part of this polyamorous relationship? No? Didn't think so. There is no reason for you to be hanging around

>>18091249
>what I want is a real relationship, someone I can talk to comfortably and get to know.
This is not the girl for that type of relationship.

If you need reasons...
You asked for an explicit discussion about this exact topic. Instead of responding in kind, she subtly rerouted the conversation and avoided answering you square.

Someone who can't respond to an explicit, objective question about the type of relationship they are in or want in the future, will not be in a relationship with explicit, objective parameters.

This is a 'no labels' kind of 'lady'. It is what it appears to be, take it or leave it.

>>18091327
I have no idea why you're so harsh man. Yes, I would be okay with a closed relationship with more than two people (poly). But like I said, not an open relationship, reaosn being that's there's too high a risk of STDs.

Anyway, I'm getting the picture now. I thought I was just insane noticing how she wouldn't be clear. I don't think I'll continue to see her.

>>18091330
Thanks for this, it's what I was thinking, but I needed to know I wasn't just neurotic. I think she just didn't want to say the wrong thing (aka the turth) and have me run the other direction

>>18091249
You're overthinking and the overthinking is both getting in your way and putting her off.

Just go with the flow.

>>18091340
You're catching feels for the town whore

>>18091461
I don't see why catching feelings for someone who you're personally compatible with is a bad thing. It's a bad thing if we don't want the same thing. Which I don't think we do. So I'll be telling her she's great and all, but we want totally different kinds of relationships, unfortunately.

>>18091425
That's great advice if it were even remotely safe for me to do that. I have no idea how sexually active she is or has been. She doesn't seem the type to slow down for a condom, and there's no way I'm risking an STD or pregnancy. I guess I'm the only guy who gives a shit about fucking total strangers lol

"Never sick it in crazy." Rings in my head everytime a girl wants to fuck on the first date. Idk who the hell the girl is yet.

>>18091908
So you're not willing to get an STD from fucking, but you are from kissing? What's up with that?

>>18091950
Are you joking? Please tell me you're joking.

>>>18091311
>But I understand what you're saying. I am probably just a fuck for her.
Just what I'm looking for but can never-ever find .. could be worse, OP

>>18091971
I must be fukt in the head compared to normal guys. I can't even stay hard fucking a stranger. I look at them and I know that all they see about me is my dick and my ability to pleasure them... All I see is a whore willing to suck and fuck any guy who's hot enough.
I didn't get fit to fuck strangers, I did it to gain self esteem after a breakup. Now I'd like a chill qt gf who gives a shit about me at least a little lol.

>>18091977
Well .. divorced five yrs back and not looking for anything more serious than a fwb as I'm too absorbed pursuing what I like to spend my time off work on. Every grill I run into fairly soon asks me what she is to me, e.g SO or just someone that's nice to have along when I have nothing else to do .. being honest about it has so far 'cost' me the grill 100℅ of the time .. nothing fucked up about wanting something else, but not what I'm looking for (in vain)

>>18091249
You are way overthinking this. Tell her what you want and ask if she's cool with it. If she says anything other than "yes," then find someone else.

You should not have went into this expecting a real relationship. I would just get her shagged but if you can't get hard because you can't get over the fact that she isn't exclusively yours then tell her with authority it's over.

Alternatively if you can get over her being a dirty little whore then fuck her in every hole she has. You could also laid down some rules like when you are hanging out and fucking there is to be no mention of her bf or any other lovers.

Personally I would have just said get to fuck if a girl tried to pull this shit with me. Polygamy is cool in porn but in real life it creates a a shitstorm of envy, vitriol and anger. It can lead to violence often as well.

>>18092290
I don't think I had any expectations other than her just telling me straight up what she wants.

> I just think you're cool and cute. I thought it would be cool to hang out
> proceeds to push for sex

Wtf kind of answer is that, and she just kept saying it. I wanted her to say "Yes, you're just a fuck buddy for me." or " No, I'd like to actually get to know you and build rapport before fucking."

So now I'm sitting here with the decision to either just go with it (knowing she's a whore in denial) or put a hard stop to it.

Problem is, same with most anons, I'm lonely af and have been single a while. Fuck it.

>>18092312
She is a woman. They are constantly calculating what they should say to a potential fuck. She won't answer because she doesn't know how you will answer. Also a lot of women don't use the word cute as an implication that you are in the friend zone. A lot of them want to fuck the brains out of a cute guy. It's a common mistake to make as I have been described as cute in the past but depending on the woman it can have different connotations.