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i feel like there is something wrong with me :(
i love sex, i think about it all the time, but i don't really watch porn much it's boring.
i masturbate maybe once or twice a week and i think about getting pounded by my boyfriend constantly. there isn't anything boring about our sex life, we're into bdsm and explore tons of kinks and are open with our fetishes.
it's just that, sometimes, i feel like it's really difficult for me to get turned on when we first start up? i'm not sure how to explain,
i feel my heart racing, i get heated, but i feel like i'm not completely there? whenever we're together i anticipate fucking him the entire time, and when it starts to happen it's like my vagina has stage fright or some shit.
it's like we're going through the actions, and i know it's good but it's like my vagina doesn't want to kick start?? or my brain is just wandering somewhere else and not thinking and realizing whats happening in the moment? it's never a problem when i'm wasted or stoned, it's just so annoying to get started!!
this has happened in my past long term relationships as well...
does anyone get what i'm saying? or has been through this?
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Maybe try to make your next time special? Make yourself anticipate not only the pounding but the whole occasion? This sounds like getting used to sex. I had a similar phase with my ex girlfriend, we'd fuck like crazy but it didn't really feel all that good.
In any case, consult a doctor about this. Sign up for some counseling for couples. Maybe this has to do with your psychology and it takes a professional to spot it. Good luck!
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Completly normal, it's called performance anxiety. That's why booze and weed bypass it. Guys have it too, just read all the stories here of guys going flacid going in.
I had it for a while with my gf. My way of fixing it was doing something I was comfortable with until I was really close of the point of no return for an orgasm, and then going in. You can do the same, talk to him and get him into it. It's great treatment and kinky roleplay. My gf loves to play a virgin, maybe try that.
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