So there's a girl I know. A few months ago we got drunk

Seriously though guys, I want to know by tomorrow morning. I'll say something then
I just want to know now what is real. It seems now that she feels like I'm important, like my feelings about her appearance means something
That's what "salon" implies
I want that to be true
Surely it can't be

>>18088094

She likes you or she wouldn't be looking to you for advice she can get from any girlfriend

>>18088103
That's assuming salon means "hair salon"
Surely that can't be
The friendship we had was an academic one
We had both the same interests

The last time we spoke, which was 3 months ago since this message, she said "God, I've wanted to talk to someone like you forever. I don't need to pretend at all about what I'm interested about"
So we talked about history, anthropology, politics, and philosophy
I enjoyed that a great bit and that really endeared me to her.
We got to talking about what it means to talk to someone and how rare it was to really be understood
I went away from that conversation thinking that it'd be a long time until I talked to someone like her

So what the fuck is this salon shit about?
Is she being coy?
"Oh let me talk about how you talked about my hair"
She's not a vain person, not remotely.

Everything is pointed towards a straightforwards interpretation of her message. That she cares about how I think.
I think she's playing pretend, like I am.
That's she's acting the woman to seem innocuous.

Fuck. I like her very very much. I can't handle the idea that she may like me the same way

>>18087896
look dude, if she's in a relationship then don't even attempt to be anything more than friends. cheaters are toxic and if she cheats on him then she's going to cheat on you, too. plus it's not fair to her boyfriend to encourage that kind of behavior.

>>18088150
That's my thought
I never dealt with her because her boyfriend was one of my good friends

Like, I dated his ex, she introduced me to him, and he introduced me to her.
That's the chain
I can't be a fuckhead and steal her
But...
Like, she and I are more similar than he and I
It's not about cheating, it's about similarity
The type of people we are is rare
The boyfriend and I already have an Eskimo connection.
What's one more, right?

You meet one person in a thousand who thinks like you
She thinks just like me
That's why she was in a relationship with her boyfriend. That's why I was friends with him
We're both attracted to him, hetero and just platonic.

But like, I can't ignore this spark we had.
It's fucking existential and shit.

>>18088172
you sound inexperienced with relationships. trust me, she is nothing special, you will connect with tons of people in your life. just ignore your sudden crush, if not for yourself than for your friend. infatuation tends to make your brain believe someone is better than they actually are. she is probably nice but certainly not irreplaceable.

>>18088203
You are right. I am inexperienced
But I am older than you expect.
A bitch that should know better.

But she has had experience
How do you explain a several month gap then?

We are not young people.
I've let her go due to infatuation

But her she is messaging me about her appearance (?).

To be totally frank.
I'm 27 years old. And so is she
There is no reason why we should be so coy about this
We had a moment .
We connected
She had a boyfriend. So leave it behind, right?

Her message complicates so much because I want her so much but restricted my wants because she was taken.
So now, I don't know what to do

>>18088295
what you should do is get over her. it's not worth it, you are both going to hurt her boyfriend and that's fucked up. and if she flirts with other guys behind his back, she will 100% do the same to you if you date her.

trust me, let it pass, date someone else.

>>18088309
I'm such a faggot that I'm going to reject your idea
We had a thing going. A thing that was indispensable.
And now her message reinforces our connection.

Do you have any idea how often I meet someone like me?
Twice in 20 years.
She is one. Just one of the two.
And I think she is the same in the judgement.

Tomorrow I will greet that message.
The fact that she was first to say something shames my masculinity.

>>18088321
>I'm such a faggot that I'm going to reject your idea

Well at least you admit it. Just remember this when it all goes to shit, because it will. You're 20? Yeah, you're still young and naive, you'll look back on this and regret it later. I feel sorry for your friend.

>>18088374
I'm 30 you fuckhead
I feel like she and I had a gentlemens agreement about not talking to eachother
But she broke that

And now I have to say something that really says I care
And I do
I hate saying shit that I care
]

>>18088380
if you're 30 then you shouldn't be this fucking dumb.

you really need to tell your friend that his girlfriend is interested in other dudes.

Asking a bunch of strangers to read someone's mind for you does not seem too bright.

Believing that you think the same as her, so that if you have a crush on her, she must have a crush on you, is a fantasy. If you really believe that, why are you here?

Thinking that the content of her message to you must have some deep significance and that if only you could decipher what she means by "salon" you would understand the secrets in her heart ... that seems almost schizophrenic.

My take on it would be that it's just a conversational gambit inviting you to talk to her. Trying to read into her intent beyond that is foolish. She may be interested in reconnecting merely because she thinks you would be an interesting friend, not that she's secretly and desperately in love with you.

The person I would want to be in a romantic relationship with is not just someone that I like and enjoy spending time with, but someone who has integrity. I would assume that if she is not a shitty person, were she seriously interested in me in a romantic way and wanting to pursue that, she would make herself single FIRST, instead of pursuing an outside romantic interest while still in a relationship.

But hey.

If you want to talk to her, then talk to her.

If you want to let her know you're interested in her romantically, then tell her. There may be fallout with your friend.

You want to meet intelligent women who have an interest in academic subjects? I wonder where you could possibly go to meet them...

>>18088397
>>18088408
No, I am not too bright
But I know what she is saying in the few words that she did
She wants me
And that makes me afraid

I'm gonna try.
Fuck me in the future you fucks.
You didn't help me at at all about what she thinks, just how I should react

>>18088428
>You didn't help me at at all about what she thinks, just how I should react

How the fuck are we supposed to know what she thinks? We aren't mind-readers. The important detail is that she's already in a relationship so there is a 100% chance of this going wrong. If she leaves her boyfriend for another guy, then she's going to do the same to you. Don't be surprised when she inevitably cheats on you.

>>18088438
It's complicated, ok?
Like, I totally get why she'd want to leave him
He's one of my best friends
I get him
I understand him

But here we are leaving him
Honestly, I'd let her leave me for someone else if she were happy
This shit is complicated as shit

>>18088450
Why are you on the advice board if you're not going to take anyone's advice? You are just looking for justification to steal your friend's girlfriend. That is not okay to do, and you are delusional if you think she is your One True Love just because she sent you a text message regarding a haircut. You need to get a grip on reality and forget about her, seriously. Stop being so fucking stupid and stubborn, it is 100% a bad idea to flirt with her. Don't. Fucking. Do it.

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>>18088465
You are right
Who am I?

But I must try
You have to understand that I need her to say that

I am a total leech faggot
But I need her to say so