My mind doesn't make any sense, my memories are filled up

>>18065286
Yes, it would. Do it ASAP.

Get angry and use it as fuel to make something of yourself. If you're not on meds, get to a doctor and see about getting yourself some

>>18065286
shit, what you describe is mostly normal life.Only most folks don'thave enough insight to realise half of it.
Only considersuicide if you have enough balls, otherwise it's just a waste of time

I don't know what is wrong with you but if you need mess which it sounds like you do then see a doctor and get in them. If you are disabled get a disability check and then go from there. Just because you are disabled doesn't mean you can't live a decent life. You might not can get an official job but you could do stuff on the side. Good luck, hope things get better. Also don't kill yourself, that's a permanent solution to temporary problems.

>>18065373
I got sent to a psychiatrist once, but it was unbearable, so I ignored the letters I got and never went again. My trust in the medical system is lost too and I mostly try to fix health problems on my own.

>>18065384
I'm not sure if this is "normal life", because of my own mindset I'm a completely sheltered person, so I shouldn't know anything. Atleast hoping that there could be more was something okay. And I'm not sure if I have the balls yet, I feel physically and mentally ill and started to burn my skin again, but driving my car into the ocean seems like a better alternative each next day.

>>18065286
Sounds like aspergers/autism

Do this:

http://www.rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php