my boyfriend cares about his friends more than me, we been together

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I've had to deal with this from a friend recently, quite similar story to yours other than the ages, it's not going to last long term

>>18062230

yeah I know it fucking sucks...

it just makes me feel so bad like am I not worth it? thers someone else he would be the right person with? its not fair like I deserve more :( it hurts me so much

>>18062219

Guys need to be with guys. They don't compete with his love for you. His male friends complement him. If you cut them off, he is going to be miserable.

>>18062242


lol obviously I cant cut them off. I'm not an abuser. I'm just saying I wanna be his top priority. we're in our mid twenties. if we had kids someday I hope our family would be more important than his guy friends.

I'm supposed to be his gf and his top priority not a bunch of dudes. he can spend all his money travelling with them but wont go anywhere with me (when Ill pay for my own costs))

>>18062237
This is literally like I'm talking to my friend, jeez...

Unless you've done something really bad you deserve a boyfriend's full attention

>>18062250

ive never done anything bad hes done some shitty things. I did one thing (Kissed a guy when we broke up a year ago for three days because I really neber wanted to see him again from what he did)

Ive never done anything bad I'm ALWAYS there for him, I always try to make him happy, etc etc etc etc hes never been there for me when I need him and he takes me for granted it hurts me so badly . like I'm 25 we been together 2 years I don't wanna start all over again with someone else at all but I feel like that's what I have to do and it just breaks my heart so much

>>18062242
This anon had the right idea. I mean, no one can say for sure other than you as it would take way too long for you to provide enough detail to come to a solid conclusion, but as a guy I can say that a big part of this issue is simply that men need time with other men.

I'm no misogynist or anything, but spending a lot of time with women, particularly ones that we lust after, can be immensely difficult. Men and women simply aren't the same, and personally, I find that I often put up with a lot of differences that I wouldn't put up with if I wasn't getring laid for it.

Simply put, have patience with your man, give him his space, and if it's too difficult for you to do that then unfortunately he's probably not the one for you.

Bros before hoes

>>18062308


I mean kinda it hurts me a lot I put him as a priority of my life and id rather hang out with him than any friends or like whatever id always rather be with him if I had the option and it just hurts me a lot that he doesn't feel the same idk whatever hes not even that great desu love is just blind. I'm gonna stop making him a priority

>>18062329
That's not entirely a bad idea. I'm sure there have been a lot of times where you've put him as a priority, and that leads you to expecting, or at least hoping, that he'd do the same, but when it comes down to it, expectations are counterproductive in so many ways. If not placing him as a priority is what you need to do to stop having expectations of him, then by all means, drop him down a few notches in your mind.

>>18062450


im going to. its just hard because I love him and its a natural thing for me to make him my top priority. like hes my boyfriend and we been together 2 years I see people I date as potential getting married to and having kids with you know. I care deeply for him and naturally I put him above everything else. so its going ot be hard to change that.
I'm just going to start making other plans and basically putting everything... working out, new friends, homeowkr, literally everything in my life first until at least he puts me in the same place that I put him in..because its not even and its not fair or right like this. ill just treat him less because I'm already so hurt. I'm just not as important to him in his life so he shouldn't be that important in mine. I'm tired of hurting.

>>18062219
Дypa? He cпpaшивaй oб этoм нa 4chan!

>>18062219
i think hes probably just using you because he feels that you probably dont want to marry him because of the difference in age. also, his friends dont like you because he told them that youre controlling or they think youre a slut.

>>18062219
sorry for being off topic, but is that image supposed to be an optical illusion or am I just really tired?

>>18062500
You don't get closer by getting further apart, lowering him as a priority sounds like something you can't do because it is one of your core values, take my advice then - and don't lower him at all. It goes against what you want to achieve AND against what you believe in. It'll create distance between you two which will damage your relationship so much deeper.
If he can't reciprocate now, and you've confronted him about it and tried to plead (It's been two years), the situation won't improve.
You need someone who matches your level of love, personally I think it is extremely sweet, I've been in your position before with my first gf, then my second gf totally matched my love levels and satisfied me, unfortunately he won't magically care more by the look of it, so don't settle.

Also, there's no such thing as "breaks", and mind games are awful, there's either *together* or *not together*.

Good luck

>>18062563

they probably think I'm controlling even tho I'm not at all.

and lmao hes a year younger than me, that's pretty much bullshit.

age, especially a year, shoudnt be a factor if you really love someone.

>>18062605
yeah. true. I told him I cant hangout Monday but that I could on the weekend but truth is it feels out of character and I know its just going to draw us apart a lot.. by waiting more than a week to see him, when hes gonna be gone in two weeks for 9 days and then gone for another week a week from that.

definitely its not going to help its just going to distance us.. and make me look bad. I think we should just break up to be honest.

>>18062605


like its gonna be super hard but I think I could probably be happier in my life with somebody else. I'm just used to him and hes familiar and he can be really sweet and act dedicated to me and like he cares sometimes but a lot of the time I don't feel like that at all and I guess its not enough for me and I honestly deserve more... I should probably cut my losses and move on now instead of furthering along I'm already 25 now and only getting older....

>>18062688
I totally get you, it sucks, It's hard, but yeah as I said it ain't getting better and you tried. It's true we're all getting older not any younger and this period of your life is too short to spend it with somebody who doesn't make you happy anymore. First red flad to see the end of a relationship is a lack of sex.. I found that in both my long term relationships sex started dwindling 2 months before the breakup came up. Atleast when you break up with him be brave and don't cheat or anything, tell him you're sorry but you need more love and he can't provide enough anymore and end it

It won't be easy I know, but It's fine since there's plenty of people like you, my ex was with me for a year and 4 months, broke up end of October of last year and I've been single since, she developed feelings for someone else and branch-hopped, don't be like that, tell your guy the truth. And make the most out of being single. Someone nice will come afterwards, just indulge in hobbies and enjoy yourself!

>>18062219
Eh just stop bothering him, assuming you've straight up told him he's an ass, and let him come to you. The relationship might die but that's for the better?

Now let me ask you something. Why do you like tumblr? Every chick (and numale lol) I know uses it but I couldn't really ever get into the layout. I have one for my girlfriend but it's been dead for years.

Why prolong your suffering? Just end it there if it goes beyond him being with his friends. If he truly deems you not worthy of his time like his lads, then it's time to look somewhere else and let this ship sink.