How weird is it to be a virgin at 22 really? I have a job, apartment,

D in the S*

>>18060533
If you missed out on romantic and social experiences during your teens, you life's pretty much done in these matters.

At 22 there might still be a chance for you since you seem to not be a loser as is usual with virgins in their 20s.

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>>18060548
Fuck.

>>18060533
It's not that weird, most people have just lost their virginity by your age because i: easier to achieve than your other accomplishments.

>>18060548
That's a little extreme, don't you think? 22 is still just barely an adult, he'll be fine.

I'd say the most important part is just not to bring it up/think of yourself any lesser for it. It's not some big life-changing event like everyone makes it out to be, but it is fun, so I'd suggest more actively pursuing a relationship now that you've got everything else set.

>>18060586
It depends.
Virginity after a certain age usually signifies that someone is a loser, or at the very least a social loser.
That usually means lack of the experiences that allow someone to function in social situatitons and it's impossibble to acquire them at that point.

But OP seems to be kind of a normie in other aspects so he might be fine.

>>18060590
They're definitely not impossible to accquire, but it could take a while depending on how inept someone is. As someone who's been in that situation, I'd say it's a lot harder approaching it with the defeatist attitude you're suggesting than just working from a neutral stance.

>>18060610
Not the same guy but have you ever seen anyone successfully land a girl while being a 25+ virgin on /adv/ or even IRL?

Cos every thread in this vein usually dies at this point.

>>18061668
it happens every time this thread is made

I didn't lose mine until I was 21. I've had four partners in the year since I lost it. I don't own my own home though.

Sex is a lot of fun but I wish I had more independence really

It's only a hindrance if you let it bother you.

Nobody knows that you're a virgin.

If you keep your social circle big and eventually find a girl and have to confront her with your virginity, just say you just never got around to it.

Nothing to worry about.

It is weird in the sense that you're in the minority and thus isn't normal (i.e. weird).

I'm a 26 year old virgin with a net worth at about $100k right now and a decent job and social life. I think I'm personally doing well in every aspect of life besides romance, so I don't think being a virgin holds you back that much as long as you can control your sexual urges.

For what it's worth, I'm probably going to hire an escort this year or next year just to experience sex for the first time.

I mean Im 26 and a virgin. Im finally finishing college this May since I started late. I had to live at home with parents in order to work and pay for school to finish with no debt. I also managed to save over $20k. If you count my car it's more.

I've had so many chances to fuck but I have no where to take the girl so I just end up not doing it. I'm actually rather good looking, fit, and have good social skills. Contrary to what most people will say about virgins my age. I just feel like shit about myself for shooting myself in the foot education wise and not being able to make more than $30k a year and no health insurance. Hopefully that will change soon, since software development is suppose to be money and I enjoy it. This has severely fractured my ego and self worth as a person and I don't posses the confidence to tell a girl about my situation in life and just don't want people to know I'm a failure.

So yeah being a virgin at this age is not normal and I would not tell a girl I was about to get with about it. I plan on losing it real quick as soon as I get a good job that Im proud of and moved out of my parents house. If I was you I'd put some effort into losing it as I plan on doing once Im in a position like you.

>>18061743
What does?

>>18060590

This is so not true. I've known some very attractive virgins that had everything going for them but just wanted to wait till they found a lasting relationship.

>>18062284
>I've known some very attractive virgins

You know very attractive liars.

(Or at the very least, people with huge red flags.)

>>18060590
Why would you even want to function in social situations? Have you seen how the world outside is like?
Here are a couple things you never considered op
How about you have sex and find out you don't enjoy it
What if you aren't even able to have sex? Who knows
Maybe you accomplish sex and it's good but you are never able to have it again
Maybe the person you have sex with is mean and tells everyone bad rumors about you
Maybe she has some horrible std
Maybe she gets fucking pregnant, how about that?
If someone told you that you actually had sex a couple years ago and you were too drunk to remember would it change anything? Of course it wouldn't because you are looking for satisfaction and fulfillment in the wrong places, interacting with other people will only bring misery, go watch some anime

>>18062342
Some people have different ideals.
A fairly recent study concluded that mellenials are less sexually active than previous generations. Plus if you lurk here, there's 20+ yr olds posting daily about it.
It's not really weird till you're 30+ imo

>>18060548
>this is how shut in autists think normal people think

>>18062284
And how did these 'attractive virgins' lose their virginity in the end?
They did lose it right?

Look, I'm not saying exceptions don't exist.
But, most of the time, being a virgin in your 20s is a sign that you're a loser.
Why do you think there's so much stigma involved with it anyway?

>>18062349
I wholeheardly agree. Anime and videogames are much preferable to real people. I despise the real world and humans in general.
But you can't go full redpill on this board, remember, this is /adv/ which is normie central, you can't tell them the truth outright you gotta ease it in.

>>18062355
>virgins in their 20s
>normal people

Choose one and only one.

Im 23 and a virgin and don't give a fuck because I've yet to actively try and lose it. Do it whenever the hell is convenient for you, it's not like you have to tell anyone.

>>18061775
>For what it's worth, I'm probably going to hire an escort this year or next year just to experience sex for the first time.

Sex with escorts is usually pretty bad desu. I'm not saying you shouldn't do it, but it wont be some big revelation. The experience wont be that great in itself, but If it lets you move forward then its probably worth it.

Getting a GF and exploring her body is completely different to just getting laid.

>>18062370
But getting a gf is something that will never happen for some people.

>>18062372

but it will for most if they want it enough. Get dating apps and join online websites. Put the work in, go on dates and it will work eventually.

Walk through your local town and you will see hundreds of fat/ugly people who have gf/bf's. You have self esteem issues sure, but there will always be someone crazy enough to be with you.

>>18062357
>, most of the time, being a virgin in your 20s is a sign that you're a loser.

You're pointing to something that seems to forever go over anon's heads. Namely, sex being something that organically happens as you grow and form bonds between people (both platontic and otherwise).

Having no sex well into your 20s usually means that your social life is lacking.

>inb4 anons pointing out exceptions.

>>18062384
>hundreds of fat/ugly people who have gf/bf's.

Actually I've found that in your late 20s all the lower end girls have basically been taken. It's like they panicked and settled straight-away.

>>18062384
I live in a big city and I've never seen any fat/ugly dude with a girl.
Granted, I don't go out much, but still.
I'm past the point of no return myself anyway, it's not only about looks.

>>18062389
That's what I've been saying the whole fucking thread. If you're a virgin in your 20s, chances are you're a social loser. Yes, exceptions do exist, but they are just that, exceptions.

>>18062398
Second this
There are like 8 million people in this city and you never see fat people much at all even tho there is an obesity epidemic simply because they don't step outside
Funny thing I have seen more fat people buying candy at a gas station at 2 am on a single night than I saw in three three months

>>18062409
And it's totally understandable too.

Being fat usually means there's something else wrong with you.

There's a reason noone finds fat people attractive, and it's not only their fatness.

Personally, I think of fat people, myself included, as suhumans. I don't leave the house out of embarassment.

>>18062413
I don't get the embarrament part
Every single human being is horrible
You are just horrible in your own way

>>18062413
You may be swinging too far in one direction. I've seen ugly/fat people with attractive girls.

>>18063066
I live in a big city and no mattter where I go I've never seen anything like that in real life.
I've only heard about it happening, when the guy has alot of money.

>>18060548
This couldn't be more wrong. Statistically, the earlier people become sexually active, the more likely they are to be dysfunctional in many areas. Early age at first sex is a widely accepted predictor for divorce, for example.

>>18063082
Then why is virginity in your 20s a synonym for being a weirdo loser?

>>18063075
I live in a big city, most people are evenly matched but there are quite a few ugly/fat dudes with hot chicks. I don't think I ever seen it the opposite thought.

>>18063082
You're acting like people in the 50s never had sex till they were married. This is not a new thing.

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>>18061775
>I'm a 26 year old virgin with a net worth at about $100k right now and a decent job and social life. I think I'm personally doing well in every aspect of life besides romance, so I don't think being a virgin holds you back that much as long as you can control your sexual urges.
This is also my coping mechanism. Aside from the social shit I'm doing better than old acquaintances so I manage to feel a slight sense of superiority despite being a 26 year old virgin. I'll never have a romantic relationship but who cares? I'll be rolling in dosh anyway.

>>18063093
He's just looking for stats to bolster his view that being a virgin in your 20s is perfectly normal, even though when you listen to older generations nothing's really changed when it comes to one night stands and sex before marriage

>>18063099
What? I didn't say that. But honestly if you want to talk about that, the longer two individuals postpone physical intimacy within a relationship, the lower the divorce rate and the higher the overall satisfaction. So there's that.

>>18063093
>implying

>>18063106
How are you social and yet never had a relationship?

>>18063114
>postpone intimacy
How long? Til you're 30s?

I mean, there may be some sort of correlation but these are sex surveys so I doubt most people are honest.

Look at 4chan, there are a lot of dudes that have "postponed" sex and a lot of them end up with /d/-level fetishes and/or end up having sex with a trap. Look at /soc/ see how many gay/trap threads there are. Out of sheer desperation and no healthy output for sex.

>>18063129
>How are you social and yet never had a relationship?
People invite me stuff so I go. That's all there is to it. I'm not a good conversationalist though and I sometimes wonder if I have aspergers. I'll see someone go up to a girl I like, talk to her for a bit, and she'll be laughing in seconds. I see it often and every time it makes me realise I'm a boring shit and there's no reason for girls to be interested in me. I'm not interesting or charismatic, I'm flat and lack opinions on most things. I think that's the reason many people always say I'm a very calming presence, I'm a cardboard human for them to offload their shit onto, a pseudo-therapist. That's the extent of my relationships. Besides, as lonely as I get I don't generally enjoy other people's company, I don't enjoy talking to them even though I want to.

I've tried asking girls out twice in my life and got shot down both times. The last one told me she cared about me "a lot" but didn't see me that way. I've accepted that's how it's gonna go for me so I just work on making my self as comfortable as possible alone.

>>18063129
No, I'm talking about relative to age or even previous partner count, the longer a couple postponed sex within their relationship, the better and more successful their relationship was. This is backing up waiting until marriage or at least waiting in general.

As for age wise, no of course not 30s. For example, for age at first marriage, divorce rates begin to increase at 32 and keep climbing after that. 25-32 is the ideal range there.

But that's not even the original point. Of course there are people here who are socially inept and this is why they can't form relationships, sexually or otherwise. I never denied that. But the original claim that if you haven't lost your virginity as teen, then you're a loser is just factually incorrect. In fact it's the opposite. People who became sexually active as teens (or even earlier) are vastly more likely to dysfunctional in relationships and other areas in life.

>>18063153
>People who became sexually active as teens (or even earlier) are vastly more likely to dysfunctional in relationships and other areas in life.

Obviously if it's even earlier they're going to be fucked up but most people, like the vast majority, lose it in their late teens.

>>18060533
The average age for loss of virginity is 17-3/4. That means that for every kid who loses it at 13, there's a just-turned-22 virgin. So, while you're running latre, you're not off the chart.

>>18063177
Yes? I wouldn't go so far at to say they are "losers", but it's just the truth that they are more likely to have problems compared to those people who became sexually active as adults.

For example, or course someone who became sexually active at 13 would have the highest divorce risk. Someone who became sexually active at 17 would have a lower risk, but someone who became sexually active at 23 would have an even lower one. The same thing applies to early/unwed pregnancy risk, depression risk, STD risk, etc. Age at first sex is a negative correlative predictor for many factors.

>>18060533

I'm 27 and I lost my virginity just a few months ago. Don't worry too much about it op.

I have a great job and I'm successful in my field of work. I studied and lived abroad and I got stories to tell. I dress well, I work out and have gotten more confident over the years.

I thought being a virgin was a huge deal, but now that I lost it, I would tell you my life isn't that much different. Sex is fun, but it is such a minuscule portion of relationships.

I would argue you should find someone you like, who would have some casual sex with you. I made the mistake of entering the relationship with the person I lost my virginity to and as much as I liked her, things just didn't work out.

Go have some safe sex to get it off your chest. Then just date around for a while to see what you want and to get more confident. That's my advice.

I don't think you're a loser anon. I'm 25 and have never had penile, vaginal intercourse and I don't feel like a loser. There are more worthwhile things in life. There's honestly more to life than just sex. You'll have your time eventually. Don't stress about it and just keep doing your thing. You're only 22 ffs.

No one cares.
Keep it to yourself and don't wear it as a badge of shame?

>>18061668
Have you ever seen your actual brain when your 25?

27 KHV, don't really care. I have no interest in women at all, never even had a woman friend.

>>18063200
these charts also rely on self reporting. it's like asking someone if they've ever been fired for a job in an interview, some will be honest, some won't so it's not a hard number

>>18060533
are you a neet?

>>18060533

You are fine. Stop obsessing.

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You have the highest odds of losing virginity when you are a little below 100 IQ. The higher IQ you have from this breaking point, the less probable is for you to reproduce.
Intelligent people start later and have less sex overall.

Quite sad. It proves that being too stupid or too intelligent is equally bad for reproducing. The more normie you are, the higher chances you have.

I lost my v card somewhere around 24-25. Now 28, single again and my dick is dry like a desert stone.

>>18060548
I always wonder who the person who comes in and posts this is and on what authority they can say this

>>18061758
>If you keep your social circle big and eventually find a girl and have to confront her with your virginity, just say you just never got around to it.

Couldn't I just pretend I'm not a virgin to her?

also to the morons who constantly perpetuate "just don't tell anyone" and don't understand how basic social dynamics work

if you have the typical shitty friends and are around them a lot, they will know you are single
they will have known you to be single the entire time you knew them, and if they know you well enough they can easily tell that you definitely never got laid

like clockwork, they will spread this to everyone in a laaaarge social circle
everyone will know, and all you can do is despise them for patronising and looking down on you, and then just completely withdraw socially
i hate them
every single one

>>18063515
yeah i tried to prove this point and got called a bitter virgin...which is somewhat true

but it is the truth, something like 50% of ivy league undergrads have never had sex, compared to 70+% of high school students

>>18062362
Fuck off, asshole.

>>18063530
>who comes in and posts this
Someone missed out on those experiences.
>on what authority they can say this
Personal experience and years of being here.

How weird is it to be without your own independence at the age of 28?

I have fucked girls and women, I've just never lived completely on my own income for more than a year in a row.

>>18060533

I was a few months off turning 22 when I lost mine and I don't remember caring all that much prior to meeting the girl I lost it with, it's just something you know or at least expect will happen eventually given you're at least somewhat attractive and a decent human being.

I have a couple of friends who are 25/26 who have yet to lose theirs and they are extremely normal and nice people who just aren't motivated to chase women.

My suggestion is to better yourself and your future meaning focus on study/career and your health and fitness and somewhere along the road you will meet one if not several ladies interested in you.

>>18063572
exactly
the only people this dire with the
"if you're not by X you're life is over" shit are bitter depressed virgins themselves
a horrible crab mentality that has very little do with giving any advice or clear-headed analysis of the situation
this is exactly what r9k was made for, to contain crabs to their bucket

>>18063574
extremely normal even in the US
you are in an age group which now remains living with parents more than any other option and often gets financial assistance even when on their own
also I love the retarded double standard that girls can just keep living with their parents until they move in with their next provider
literal leeches

>>18063600
Let's hypothesize.

Let's say that there is this person. And the only things you know about him, is that he grew up and lives in a western country, is in his 20s and is a virgin.

What is the first image that comes to mind about him?

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>>18060533
No offense but if you're 21+ and never had a gf, you're so far behind it's not even worth worrying about anymore. It's not going to happen. Even if it did, which it won't, you'd be so inexperienced she'd drop you in less than a week. You have to understand that girls are hooking up and having relationships from the age of 13 onwards. You're a fully grown man and you haven't even held hands. You cannot recover from that.

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>>18063613
This, you would be like a middle schooler trying to debate with someone with a PhD about German philosophy. It will only be good to embarrass you.

>>18063611

Anyone with any kind of life experience wouldn't think twice about a situation like that, a 20 year old is a literal child. Hell I know some attractive, career driven introverts who have yet to lose theirs who are in their mid 20's.

If you want to worry about anything it should be the lack of relationship experience and not the sex. Ask anyone after losing their virginities and how life changing it was after their first time... it wasn't.

Even relationship experience can be learned from friends/family, some people who have never had a relationship will go on to have a more successful one then the person who has had several.

>>18063611
nothing
I know absolutely nothing about this person
there is not enough information to create an image

>>18063609
well im kinda from a way poorer and smaller country, but ok

shit has kinda been stressful when i changed my career path after doing some work in my actual field that i studied for and liked.
and for various reasons i came back to live back home and work something completely different. i practically started learning new shit from the scratch. we will see how it turns out. i can always go back being an agronomist lol.

>>18063696
>well im kinda from a way poorer and smaller country, but ok
then you are normal not just statistically but culturally
if you're not married you've got nothing to worry about in that regard

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>>18060533
OP, here's a question: do you WANT a relationship?

If you're happy being alone, be alone. Save up for a house and get out of the rental trap.

If you want a relationship, go out and talk to women. If you talk to enough, you will eventually get a relationship.

This is how men have been doing it since language has been invented. It's not rocket science.

>>18063713
thx anon

it sounds silly, but i think you raised my hopes a bit

>>18063719
>If you talk to enough, you will eventually get a relationship

Kinda reminds of that anon that hit on every single woman in his campus and got a rep for being a creep cos he kept asking everyone.

>>18063611
Jon Snow?

>>18063611
A 2nd or 3rd generation immigrant.
Literally people who are still adhering to the culture of their parents'.

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>>18063515
HEre I have this official graph too and it confirms that sex is for retards

>>18064172
kek

Speaking of social awkwardness, what do you guys do when conversations with friends (or otherwise) drift towards sex/relationships?

>>18065123
Nice filename.

These sort of threads always end unsolved and bitter virgins mad at women.

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>>18065147

>>18060533
If you feel like it's an impediment to dating, use the pay from your job to go to Navada and legally buy the services of a professional whore. It's probably not your virginity that'se the problem, but if you are obsessed with it, it is something you can change.

>>18065253
Seconding this, but there might be places closer than Vegas. Don't use backpage/craigslist, because you're always playing Russian roulette meeting up with people from those sites. Go to an indoor brothel where it's legal, which probably means Vegas if you're in the western US.

Every time a rich guy gets shaken down in divorce court, we all ask ourselves "how many whores could that have bought?"

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>>18062389
22 year old virgin here like the OP. The virgin part doesn't particularly bother me, but the lack of a romantic relationship does; most of the friendships I have also feel pretty vapid. I don't know if you're right, but I know you're true in my case.

>only child
>poor household
>raised only by my mother
>mother was mentally ill
>was beaten and emotionally maltreat frequently as a child
>was kept often from going out to see other children as my mother was overprotective
>only things I had were mostly video games and books
>worked hard to get to top uni in hope of becoming happy
>now here, but suffer frequent depressive episodes and feelings of loneliness
>tfw no gf, etc

I've tried expanding out and meeting people in a fuckload of societies and mingling. But still no relationship. It's probably due to me lacking the knowledge of how to flirt, how to talk 'normally' to girls, and having these memories and the emotional pain that keeps flaring up (although I cover my probable plethora of complexes up with a cheery, bombastic, and clownish persona).

It's probably because the only close relationship (with my mother) that I have had in my life was pretty fucked up that a lack of girl in a loving relationship hurts so much. Virginity itself I couldn't give a fuck over, but for me it closely corresponds with the fact that I've got nobody who I can love and who loves me. And seeing others around me being happy and comfortable with other people in such relationships but being completely lost and alone in that regard hurts a fucking lot.

If any anon has any tips for making up for a lost childhood and adolescence (socially and emotionally, that is) and learning to integrate properly, I'd appreciate it a lot.

>>18065134
Usually say nothing. May make a joke to lighten moods. Turn to self-deprecating humour when the topic turns to me, if ever.

>"hah, anon fucks watermelons!"

or shit like that

>>18061668
I didnt get laid until I was 19 I think to a prostitute. I'm fairly normal at this point. Still a bit of a loser but I can close and perform in social situations. Some people were losers for a certain stage of their life, it doesn't mean they are 100% losers. Some people just have rough patches.

>>18065383
I'd like that kind of advice as well, but I doubt we'll get anything more than "Go to places where people congregate, and talk to people". That's all the advice that people like us are ever given, perhaps because its all we need.

>>18063594

Did she know you were a virgin?

>>18065631
>19

Get off this thread.

>>18060533
Considering the amount of threads here on the subject, I'd say not unusual at all ...

>>18065390
I just leave BEFORE the topic turns to sex. It's important you leave before, otherwise they'll notice you leaving at a certain point.

I don't think anyone "knows" I'm a virgin mostly cos most people don't give it a second thought.

>>18063556
>if you have the typical shitty friends and are around them a lot

You need to get better friends.

>>18061668
I personally did this. I lost my virginity at 26 to a willing partner. Shortly after, I began a relationship that lasted over a year. Now I'm just dating very casually.

>>18066650
>I lost my virginity at 26 to a willing partner
>willing partner

That's an odd way to put it. What in God's name were you planning to do before?

Ignoring that, how'd you get past your complete lack of experience? Or was she similar to you?

>>18060533
if you don't proactively go out looking for sex/intimacy, had never had the luck of someone from the other gender randomly being interested in you, and aren't a person who's into the whole getting-drunk-every-weekend thing, not having sex is the default way of life.

>>18066879
If you don't proactively go out to the grocery store looking for food, had never had the luck of someone randomly cooking for you, and aren't a person who's into the whole going-to-a-restaurant-and-getting-stuffed thing, not eating is the default way of life.

>>18061668
only IRL
never on /adv/ (how would one even verify lol). I'm working with a bunch of mathematicians. Back when we were in gradschool half of our class are virgins. None of them I would describe as bad looking, I'm the only one who browses 4chan and ironically also one of the most socially active guys, TAing, organizing two talks and one seminar and keeping our connection with math department of overseas universities (mainly through collaboration). The "virgins" are all married with kids now though.

Damn, im almost a Wizard, i should kill myself?

>>18066903
If you don't proactively go out looking for fresh air, had never had the luck of someone randomly giving you an oxygen tank, and aren't a person who's into the whole going-on-a-mountain-and-getting-kinda-high thing, not breathing is the default way of life.

Just turned 23. Feel kind of the same way. By practically most measures, I'm reasonably successful, but I've never had any luck with women.

>>18066913
How'd you know they were virgins?

>>18061668
My brother was a 30 yo virgin but he's engaged to be married

>>18069093
Sounds like an arranged marriage.

Porn doesn't quench your thirst. In fact it seems to make it worse, so you go for more novel porn like /d/-level stuff.

I bet that's how some anons start going for traps.

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>>18060533
I'm almost 19 and still a virgin. Don't really give a fuck to be fair. Never had. You will fuck someone eventually. Be yourself dude.
Society as a whole makes a big deal out of sex. Don't feel ashamed about it.

>>18069493
>19

Why is it that stupid teens need to come over to threads that don't include them?

>>18069493
>19

Kek you merely adopted darkness kid.

>>18069493
>19

Please fuck off.

>>18069561
how does this subject exclude him in any way you piece of crap

>>18070006
He doesn't have an issue at this age.

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>>18060533
23 here, mostly given up on the chance of it ever happening.
Same situation as you, job, apartment, everything.
I practically never go out, unless it's my job, the gym, movies, etc. I don't do proper social activities that would let me meet people.
At least there's the internet and fiction to replace most things.

>>18070810
>At least there's the internet and fiction to replace most things.

Somewhat but I don't think porn, especially the shit we get here, is a healthy outlet for sexual desires.

If you are under 30 its normal. Over 30 you might be doing something wrong. I mean a lot of 18 year olds are already worrying about this shit. And it just doesnt matter.