When you KNOW its never going to get better. What then? I am

>>18040358
bruh, just get laid.

>>18040358
No one knows anything with 100% certainty so anything's possible. If you don't want to kill yourself then embrace life and take the necessary steps to improve yours.

>>18040358
get a hobby or do sports

it's just as easy as that, all you have to do is force yourself (but that's the hardest part by far).

>>18040388
>>18040370
>>18040361

JUST B URSELF

I think living in that 50/50 split of wanting to kill yourself and knowing you won't is probably the worst. The suicide thoughts will keep you from making improvements because you know it won't matter. Thus your in a state of nothing. You live because you don't really have a choice. At this point, might as well accept it and try to find new things to like about living.

I recommend a healthy commitment to personal emergence. I've got a comparably sordid past and the best thing I've come up with is to occupy myself with endeavors that contribute to personal development.

For example, how good is your diet? In the manner you describe yourself, I'd wager that the decisive factor in your food/dietary choices is a. Convenience and b. IDGAF; maybe not all the time, but some?

Then there's exercise and stretching. If you haven't stretched in a minute, there's probably all sorts of tension that you've tuned out.

Exercise is kind of a given when it comes to a healthy, functioning system so if you haven't in a while, go for a walk.

Basically, your mood could be because you're depriiving your body in some capacity, so you might look into that while you're waiting to die (no diss).

>>18040358
What happened in your life that you failed?

>>18040358
Write down how much you hate your life on a piece of paper. Start improving yourself in every waking moment. Every time you feel your motivation slip, read the paper to remind yourself that you have nothing to lose

Smoke weed