Let's start a thread with most fucked up things an ex has

>>18029289
That's hot.

Cared for someone who emotionally and mentally fucked me up. Was literally going crazy and had to move to my parent's home state to regroup.

He compared me to other girls. Constantly looked at other girls in front of me.
Had his mum and step dad refer to me as his gf when I wasn't (damaged and confused tf out of me)
Would ghost me for days on end when he was the only person I knew in a different state and city
Constantly called me disrespectful without evidence to back it up (wound up catching him bringing a girl over to his apt then found her thong laying in the floor in his apt days later)
Constantly lied to me and bluffed when I could see straight through it and had witnessed things with my own eyes -- all without his knowledge
He wanted all my quirks and kinks but didn't want to stick things out when I was upset or had a depression spell
All around Chad
Believed in that alpha/beta crap and tried to convince me I should sit idle while he bangs other girls because I should be grateful of my feelings for love towards an alpha
Browses /pol/ and b*tched at me for coming on here and /r9k/
His youtube videos aren't even that funny but that's probably because I know he's a total piece of manipulative shit irl
Dude's also hit me, broke my belongings like punching holes through doors and walls

Was a truly shit guy. I should of set his stuff on fire back in August when I had the chance. Stay tf away from the north east if you're in the USA.

Wow. I'm really sorry you had to go through that. What the actual fuck is wrong with people. Glad you're done with that thrash "individual".

>>18029402
Let's be glad we're onto a new chapter

>>18029289
I found that really hot. But then I've cut my ex with a knife while I was fucking her for our enjoyment too, so idk how normal that is

Dated me for 9 months
Broke up telling me he never actually had feelings. He just told me what I wanted to hear because I was just fat and ugly so he knew he wouldn't have to put in as much work and he just wanted some experience so he could get with chicks who actually were attractive.

Never dated since. One eating disorder later I'm much thinner but I don't think I'll ever trust people when they say they like me or find me hot. I immediately shut all compliments down and remind myself they don't mean anything they say, they're just trying to get laid.
Even though I know it's unfair to think that way.

Well, you should open yourself to the possibility that some rare people will see underneath and actually appreciate you on the inside. Also, what's "hot", people??

By cuts I mean literally there was no uncut skin left. Anywhere.

>>18029440
Assuming you're referring to me,
I know, as I said I know deep down it's unfair to reject everyone and assume the worst of them the way I do.
I just bought into this guys lies so easily. I never even guessed it, I thought he was perfect. He never did anything to ever tip me off he was using me. Hell, he stuck out the lie for 9 months, and I never actually did bang him. Just sucked his dick. I thought it was so nice how patient he was being with me. He was literally just sitting back and waiting though.
I think the only reason he came clean was because he moved and therefore had no use for me anymore.
He seemed so believable, so I just fuck myself in the head thinking "anyone could be doing this and you won't ever know."

>What's hot people?
I don't really even know. Only thing I do know is it's skinny.

>>18029451
Skinny?
But have you reached the point of acceptance?

>>18029454
Personal acceptance?
No. It's hard because my entire lifes goals and purpose kind of revolve around others. All I ever wanted was to love and be loved, in that specific romantic sense. Basically, I just want to be someone's wife. It's all I've ever wanted.
Ergo, I need to be accepted by someone else to really be happy. But it's hard to believe them and allow myself to be accepted given my experience.
Dude really destroyed my whole life.
The anorexia kinda eats at my brain, clouds my judgement and just keeps whispering "It'll be better when you're skinnier. You weren't good enough for him because you were fat. He would have actually loved you if you were skinny." Too often I keep believing that voice.

From what you posted it's clear the guy is utter crazy garbage.
If there was one way someone could help you, what would it be? He abused you, you deserve better and you know it. Never forget it.

>>18029462
Have you tried seeing a therapist?
And besides, do you have any friends? Someone who you could trust to be truthful enough?

>>18029467
Idk, its weird because I'm completely rational about the fact I'm fucked up, I have a mental illness and it's irrational thinking. I know all that. But I can't seem to stop it.
Therefore I also understand that there's literally nobody who can fix this for me, but me. Yet I still for whatever reason cannot seem to do it, or know how to.
I know what would fix this for me would be to get into another relationship that would hypothetically be much more healthy. I'd be able to see the good side of it all, since he was my first and only serious boyfriend.
I'm having difficulties finding that though, given the climate of the adult dating scene, the fact that I lost all my friends post high school graduation, and well, the fact that I'm a basket case which will obviously turn most people off. I've been trying to get back out there, I've been using all the usual methods of meeting people, the closest I've come to is offers for fuck buddies.
I thought it was helping to some degree. Even though it is just a strictly physical relationship, the fact that they keep coming back does help me believe them a little bit when they say nice things about me. However, I still have yet to have any of them reach out to /me/, I'm always the one contacting them. Ergo, I feel like they don't actually desire me at all, I'm just presenting myself to them so they'll take it.

I don't really know what the solution is. I know I should just cut off the physical crap but I just hate having nothing at all.

>>18029475
I have before, but I never felt I got anything out of it. Because it felt kind of like the same process. I'm paying her to tell me what I want to hear. None of what she says is real, I'm giving her money to say it.
I don't have many friends, but I don't put much stock in their opinions on me, because A, they're straight women. What do they know about what's appealing to guys? and B, I already know them to sugar coat everything. The morbidly obese people on My 500lb Life are "just as beautiful as anyone else!". They're too optimistic.

>>18029396
Alpha/beta crap? You think its bs.

Also someone please give me the rundown on the chad meme. Obvious newfag here.

>>18029527
"Chad" is the name given to the types of dudes that are "SUPER MANLY".
Think like, frat boy stereotypes. They drown in pussy and are the definition of pure testosterone. Was coined on r9k I believe.

>>18029495
Oh, so it's you from yesterday. I even remember your thread from 6 months ago or so?
Anyway, did you tell them that? About how you feel that you're just paying them etc.
About your friends, gender has nothing to do with what's aesthetics, it's relative. Even guys can't agree on what's attractive.
About the sugar coating, I don't know, I have friends that are honest enough to call me on my bullshit, to tell me exactly what's wrong so maybe try to befriend honest people? I don't know.

>>18029551
No, I stopped seeing her a long time ago. I don't have the money to see another therapist, I can go to the shitty free thing my campus offers, but I really just don't see the benefit. And I don't want the school sniffing around me too much. I don't want the stigma that comes with seeing a therapist. I'm stubborn, I know.

Idk, I just only put stock into what men think of me physically. Even if 2 different men think opposite things, I take it all into consideration. I'm not trying to attract women, so I don't care about their opinions.

>>18029582
Well if you're the same girl from 6 months ago (you still obsess over the same pictures), you just didn't hear what they said, your thread derailed into THICC posting after you left.
So no you don't take it all in consideration, you're too biased so you only read what comforts the idea that you have of yourself. If you're the same girl, we told you that you just need to hit the gym, so you'll lose your beer belly and you'll be totally fine.

>>18029610
I don't really remember. It might have been me, I've posted my experience with this shit a couple times.
I guess maybe I should rephrase it, I take stock into what guys I find attractive like. Since, they're the ones I'm trying to attract.

but youre right. I still need to lose some weight. I'm really hoping I'll be fine when I get there. I just want to see some results soon. I want someone to like me genuinely soon.

>>18029623
And what are they attracted to?
Because usually
, fit guys like fit girls, not skinny. That means the "high test" as they call them, which you could totally be if you hit the gym are attractive too.
And how do you do to lose weight? You know that starving yourself won't help you.

>>18029644
I'm not really into fit guys. I like skinny guys.

It seems to have been working pretty well... It's just a problem when I break and binge. But it's not often enough to really be a failure to me. I still slowly but surely drop down eventually over time.

>>18029666
I am a skinny guy myself (180 cm for 52 kg this summer) and I'm so attracted by my gf even if she was on the 60'ish side so err no, not all skinny guys like skinny girls.
Yeah but what's you're routine? The way you count calories? Iirc you went to 1000 calories a day right? How much do you eat right now? How many times a week do you hit the gym? How much weight are you losing and how much muscle are you gaining?

>>18029679
I'm only doing 3-500. I count by just eating prepackaged food that tells me its calorie count.
I do 1 microwave meal at night, and some tea usually. I don't work out much, I do some time on the treadmill and a couple push ups every now and then. I don't really want to gain muscle, it makes you look bigger.

I probably have talked with you before, this conversation does seem familiar.

>>18029435
That's awful. Fuck people who just use and discard others.

>>18029696
Yeah, pretty much.
Worlds cruel though, he'll never be punished for it. He went on to have all the hotties he wanted and a pretty successful life so far.
And then theres me.

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>>18029694
Yup, we did.
But let me explain something, your body doesn't consume much when you're idle, you need to actually push it, doing sloppy exercises won't do much, while doing an hour of workout twice a week is enough to see some results.
And no, muscle is way denser than fat so it makes you look smaller (pic related) and healthy, and that's what attractive, not the number you see on the scale. My gf has a pretty strong back because she swims a lot and if that's not attractive, I don't know what is.

>>18029715
It'll make you look bigger than just skinny though. Like if you're just scrawny with no muscle, you're smallest. Then muscle, then fat, in terms of bigness.
Plus theres the masculine factor. I think muscle, even small amounts, just look masculine. I want to look as dainty and feminine as possible.

>>18029727
I think that you're mistaking petite and feminine. You can be both, or you can be small but tomboyish or you can be big boned and feminine. The wide hips, big ass and tits, that's a plus you have, you think that Marilyn Monroe is too fat? That if she lost weight and muscle she'd be more feminine?
Masculine is wide shoulders, and V shape, while for women, it's the hourglass shape with wide hips.

Also. It's not like you have much choice, you can't get smaller, or tighten your hips. So embrace your curves and turn them into something that makes you look healthy and active, not like a fat lazy slob.

Either way, try it and if you gain too much muscle you can lose it by cutting a bit and stopping exercising.

>>18029396
>Stay tf away from the north east if you're in the USA
>over literally one dude
Over reacting at its finest

>>18029679
Jesus. Isnt that unhealthy? Im 186 cm and weigh about 65 kg and thats already underweight, though not dangerously so. Try to eat and move more, get some flesh on those bones.

>>18029766
I'm 62 kg now (with 2 kg in 3 weeks) by hitting the gym twice a week and eating until I almost throw up.
But for that weight, I usually get down to 52/53 every summer so I'll try to pack up some muscles before summer.
Thanks for the advice tho

>>18029747
Idk, I think she would have looked better if she weren't chubby and I know a lot of people in the modern era would agree, at least that she's considered chubby.
I know I'll never look the way I really want to, its a hard pill to swallow. I'm having a hard time coming to terms with that. I wanted to just be like "I'll get as close as I humanly can to perfection" but my close just wont ever be close enough.
If I had dudes I liked lining up to tell me how great my curves are, I could probably be happier. Instead I just see a bunch of posts like, "curves is just code for fat these days, you aint foolin anyone".

I'm just afraid of gaining the muscle and not liking it, because losing fat is easy. Losing muscle is difficult, because you just have to let it atrophy. And I;ve already been trying to get my thighs to atrophy for years, but they're still big and meaty because I have to use them so much walking around my stupidly large, hilly campus

>>18029782
When I said embrace your curves, I didn't mean that you should be in denial, but more that you should use the assets that you have.
For exemple, I've always been a lanky dude, long slender arms, narrow chest, and kinda convinced myself that I'm okay with it. But now that I'm training, I used what were once handicaps and turned them into levers, being skinny means that gaining weight is much more visible, having a metabolism that quick means that I'll use my nutrients much quicker so I'm not afraid of gaining fat etc.
You should try to write down what are the perks of having a body like yours, and try to find solutions to the disadvantages, for example having strong thigs mean that you could be much more efficient in squatting which will lead to a better way of getting a shaped ass etc.
You can turn everything into an opportunity, you're American after all heh

>>18029289
Mine started off slow and casually escalated into a disastrous abusive situation
He took my virginity by pressuring it out of me when he wouldn't take the fact that I wasn't ready for an answer
Said that waiting two months was too long
I was literally underage at the time it happened
Afterwards everytime something went wrong he convinced me it was my fault
I was constantly apologizing for everything
Constantly felt like shit for everything
Had me be only with him and his friends and got upset every time I went to hang out with my friends
When he travelled out of country a few months on a trip much further into the relationship he was posting photos with other women and I got upset when he openly admitted they were flirting with him and he bought them presents to mail from America
"But anonette I'm just being a good sport they've never had American X, Y, Z"
Eventually it got to the point I was having constant anxiety attacks over the way he talked to me and made me feel and I was convinced the entire time it was my fault
Sexual abuse started too where he just kept getting kinkier and kinkier in bed and I didn't know how to tell him no anymore when things started getting way out of hand with what he wanted to experiment with
Started losing weight I was barely eating
Finally my friends come by and force an intervention for me
Do a complete 180 and tell him really quickly we can't be a thing anymore after this went on almost two years
He says he understands and I promptly take him off of facebook as a friend
The very next day his friends who I thought had become my friends start messaging me saying I'm a horrible person for all the sick sexual shit I did to him and I actually believed them
Blocked the ex and refused to have anything to do with it
Friends supported me
One day many months later his friends come up to me an apologize saying that he started being awful to him too
To this day I'm terrified of getting into relationships

>portrayed herself as the best waifu and loyal girl ever
>I went abroad, she was mad jealous and made my life hell while I was there
>came back, started living together
>find out she has cheated on me while I was abroad
>I break up
>she threatens to kill herself
>I can't call paramedics cause her studies allow nothing on her record (country's laws)
>decide to work it out
>meanwhile she searches for someone else to pay the rent without me knowing while I actually give my all to patch things up while she's being a total manipulative bitch
>visit family for Christmas
>get a message she has no feelings for me anymore 01.01.2017
>I come "home" to see all my shit packed in boxes so I leave
>find out from stranger she has found another guy to live with her
>month goes by, refuses to give my shit back
>finally gives me 1/800th of whats mine to a friend
>call her up and call her a fucking thief and a whore
>says she's sorry and that she loves me LOL

He obviously ditched her after a fuck and now she wants back, the pathetic bitch.

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My ex penetrated me in my sleep, came inside me and then claimed he was sleep walking.

>>18030155
You must be loose as hell if you didn't even realize you were being dicked, either that or your ex had a micro-penis.

>>18029289
wow thats super gross i feel sorry for you, but it sounds like you were dating someone a little underage.

i guess reading his/her facebook and reading some nasty shit about me between his/her friends. and how people make fun of me for being poor.

>>18030155

you obv need to pay more attention to your man.

>>18029762
Yup

>>18030149
Why didn't you call paramedics? You could've got ridden of her and still fuck her life.